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Intense Depersonalization/Derealization After Marijuana Consumption

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yteek

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Dec 13, 2011
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I've seen a few other complain this and was wondering if anyone else has anything to add.

Depersonalization (or depersonalisation) is an anomaly of the mechanism by which an individual has self-awareness. It is a feeling of watching oneself act, while having no control over a situation.[1] Sufferers feel they have changed, and the world has become less real, vague, dreamlike, or lacking in significance. It can be a disturbing experience, since many feel that, indeed, they are living in a "dream". Chronic depersonalization refers to depersonalization disorder, which is classified by the DSM-IV as a dissociative disorder. Though degrees of depersonalization and derealization can happen to anyone who is subject to temporary anxiety/stress, chronic depersonalization is more related to individuals who have experienced a severe trauma or prolonged stress/anxiety. Depersonalization-derealization is the single most important symptom in the spectrum of dissociative disorders, including dissociative identity disorder and "dissociative disorder not otherwise specified" (DD-NOS). It is also a prominent symptom in some other non-dissociative disorders, such as anxiety disorders, clinical depression, bipolar disorder, borderline personality disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder, migraine and sleep deprivation. It can be considered desirable, such as in the use of recreational drugs.
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I would add that it is a very common effect of psychoactive drugs and it is not pathological in of it self in the scope of it occurring while intoxicated with a substance. While all psychoactive drug classes can cause it, it is far more common with psychedelic/psychedelic like drugs, including cannabis, and with depressants. But one can observe it in some people even with psycho-stimulants and opioids.

It is exploited in the clinical setting with depressants when used for procedural sedation and sedation of mechanically ventilated patients with depressants like midazolam or propofol, to make the unpleasantness of the situation seem distant and not real.

Anyone into dissociative recreational drugs is surely familiar with the effect as well, and as in your quoted text, is a sought after effect in that setting as well.

While some persons may find it to be an adverse effect, it is generally harmless and does not indicate any sort of underlying psychopathology. Although it can provoke anxiety, particularly from a drug without with strong sedative and amnesic effects.

I enjoy it myself, and like good potent sativas which I find produce it more readily then indicas.

I get from cannabis sometimes, and find it either neutral or positive.
 
Derealization happens to me all the time.

I have PTSD though, I'm sure it has nothing to do with the cannabinoids I consume, for myself.

It could be different for different people. <3
 
Wait... you're telling me people smoke/consume marijuana and then enter an out of body state of conscience? I have only heard of this happening with dissociatives like Ketamine and MXE. Perhaps I am more ignorant than I think, but I believe "anomaly" is an understatement. I have smoked weed for many many years and have never had this happen to me and have never seen or heard of it happening to anyone else, ever.

Is this dependant on dose?
 
Intrinsic man said:
Wait... you're telling me people smoke/consume marijuana and then enter an out of body state of conscience? I have only heard of this happening with dissociatives like Ketamine and MXE. Perhaps I am more ignorant than I think, but I believe "anomaly" is an understatement. I have smoked weed for many many years and have never had this happen to me and have never seen or heard of it happening to anyone else, ever.

Is this dependant on dose?
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I can see it happening if you eat too much herb in edibles. I read an essay by Dr. Andrew Weil where he described something like this happening when he intentionally ate too much hash.

http://www.erowid.org/plants/cannabis/cannabis_writings5.shtml

Dr. Andrew Weil "The Natural Mind" 50-51 said:
In 1968, when I was studying marihuana in Boston, I deliberately consumed an overdose (6 grams) of potent hashish in order to experience this reaction. I took it orally, under observation, and kept notes as long as I was able. The effects of the drug were felt within forty minutes and were pleasant but strong for about a half-hour. Thereafter, things became quite confusing. I could not understand what was said to me, felt physically sick, and soon was unfit to do anything but lie in bed and wait for morning. Auditory hallucinations were prominent, especially threatening voices that rose in volume to a crescendo, the faded out. For about twelve hours I remained in a stage of consciousness between sleeping and waking, marked by vivid nightmares. Lucid intervals were rare; for much of the time I did not know where I was, even thinking I was six years old and sick from measles. By morning, most of the worst symptoms had disappeared, but I had a powerful hangover that left me prostrate for another twenty-four hours. I would not willingly repeat the experience.
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When I was 17 I accidentally ate too much herb thinking that I'd have to in edibles since I'd been smoking it for the past few days, and that it was schwag so I'd have to eat a lot of it. I had an expererience much like the one I quoted and I remember I had periods of time when I forgot I was on drugs or that I'd taken something and they didn't last long but it wasn't fun; but there were also times when it was like I was just an observer to what was happening to me. I also remember when I was trying to sleep it off that I was lying in bed and it felt as though I was floating and spinning in the air. I'm glad I was alone and my parents were not at home since it would have been impossible to hide being high from them. It was a psychedelic experience but before that I'd just taken a high dose of LSD one time and smoked a fair amount of pot.

I also remember on the large dose of LSD sort of getting some derealization/depersonalization but it didn't last that long at all, and I got it stronger on a moderate/large dose (for myself) of mushrooms that gave me a ++++ experience or a level 4 experience if you're going by the shroomery "levels" of trips, and I remember eating the mushrooms and they kicked in very suddenly and I said to my friend who was also tripping "Am I dreaming that I ate mushrooms?" and my friend did get worried but then I just went with it and tripped hard.

I have had it happen to me while sober but I do not have a disassociative disorder or derealization/depersonalization disorders. I did talk to a theerapist about this and I don't have any of those. When I've had it happen while sober it doesn't last long at all.

In Bluelight's the darkside forum I remember in a thread about derealization/depersonalization someone linked to a site of a woman who actually has depersonalization or derealzation and it happens to her while she's sober. I will try to look for it and post it here.

I found the website here it is: http://www.dreamchild.net/DPDR/dpdr.html

Just for fun I did a search for both depersonalization/derealization on erowid's trip reports and I found a fair amount of drug experiences.

http://www.erowid.org/experiences/e...Group=-1&Str=depersonalization&Intensity=&I2=

and

http://www.erowid.org/experiences/e...ng=&Group=-1&Str=derealization&Intensity=&I2=
 
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Intrinsic man said:
Wait... you're telling me people smoke/consume marijuana and then enter an out of body state of conscience? I have only heard of this happening with dissociatives like Ketamine and MXE. Perhaps I am more ignorant than I think, but I believe "anomaly" is an understatement. I have smoked weed for many many years and have never had this happen to me and have never seen or heard of it happening to anyone else, ever.

Is this dependant on dose?
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I think its the specific person more then anything, I've heard of quite a few people experiencing this after marijuana consumption and sometimes for a lengthy amount time.

Depersonalization is not limited to disassociates...it's even a natural occurrence sometimes thats not drug related.

There's even a movie about this called "Numb"...guy smokes weed and same thing happens.
 
I think I have some sort of derealization disorder....I have issues with anxiety and depression and from what I can see, these did start around when I started smoking a lot...But I'm not sure if it's caused by the weed because I started experiencing these issues before I started smoking frequently(maybe even before I started at all, I'm not sure). It's tough to say if it was coming anyway or if it was completely separate, and caused by the weed. If I had to guess I'd say I was prone to it and the marijuana consumption brought it out or made it worse. Maybe if I cut back on the smoking I would feel "normal" again, but I have taken pretty long breaks and never felt a difference. It's frustrating because I just feel numb to everything =/
 
I was derealized for 7 months after smoking a strong sativa and it was the worst experience of my life. I did not smoke at all in those 7 months hoping it would go away but abstaining from the weed did not help, it stilled lingered on in my head. Weirdly though, it randomly passed and faded away at 6-7 month mark. Felt like 10 years to me.
 
From what I've read, it is mostly related to either super intense dosages of cannabis, or with pre-existing mental conditions that may underline anxiety, stress, or your current mental state being amplified by a psychedelic.

Anyway, I suggest you use the search engine in the future:
http://www.bluelight.ru/vb/threads/...nalized-from-WEED?highlight=depersonalization
http://www.bluelight.ru/vb/threads/558756-Depersonalization-amp-weed?highlight=depersonalization
http://www.bluelight.ru/vb/threads/553555-Depersonalization?highlight=depersonalization
http://www.bluelight.ru/vb/threads/...tion-smokers-here?highlight=depersonalization

Myself, I have only experienced it once, on my first edible experience (consumed 3.5 grams worth of canna-oil in homemade brownies, high quality stuff). Have not yet, but I've had several "third person" view experiences on traditional psychedelics and on dissociatives.
 
Chee$e said:
I was derealized for 7 months after smoking a strong sativa and it was the worst experience of my life. I did not smoke at all in those 7 months hoping it would go away but abstaining from the weed did not help, it stilled lingered on in my head. Weirdly though, it randomly passed and faded away at 6-7 month mark. Felt like 10 years to me.
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I am going through this same exact thing. Form everybody i talk to 6-7 months seems to be the constant mark for total recovery. I am at month 3 and there has been a definite lift in my depersonalization/derealization and anxiety. emotions are still blank, but i anticipate their coming back.

Were you ever able to enjoy grass again, or did it remain unpleasant if/when you tried it again? i really hope i will be able to and it would raise my hopes to know someone else who went through a similar experience was able to enjoy it again.
 
GeekTweak.0 said:
I am going through this same exact thing. Form everybody i talk to 6-7 months seems to be the constant mark for total recovery. I am at month 3 and there has been a definite lift in my depersonalization/derealization and anxiety. emotions are still blank, but i anticipate their coming back.

Were you ever able to enjoy grass again, or did it remain unpleasant if/when you tried it again? i really hope i will be able to and it would raise my hopes to know someone else who went through a similar experience was able to enjoy it again.
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I didn't start smoking again until about 3 months after I recovered because I was terrified it would happen again. When I finally mustered up the courage to try it again like an idiot, luckily I enjoyed it and it never did that to me again. But now it is bringing up more problems in me these days, huge amounts of anxiety. I cant smoke weed anymore now without being very panick/anxiousy the next 2-3 days. After the 2-3 days the anxiety tends to go down but it shoots right back up the next day after a smoke session. I am quitting permanently after this 4/20 next week, it is presenting way more negatives than positives in my brain which I have absolutely no control over. I wish I could smoke it, I am not a drinker because alcohol's effects tend to be boring to me. Uhh whatever, sober life after this week I guess...
 
I am glad to have more new information for myself on this matter. Just a somewhat off-topic question: During those 7 months, how many months in were you actually able to enjoy life again? Like i said im only at month 3, and my anxiety/schizophrenic-like symptoms are gone for the most part, but i still feel pretty miserable. No emotions still, little enjoyment out of life. My general mood tends to fluctuate rapidly between feeling "good" to feeling generally anxious, depressed, lethargic/apathetic, and just foggy headed. I am not sure if you have had all of these same symptoms, but it would be comforting to know if and/or when you started to feel "normal/happy" again.

(kinda funny hows i will want to smoke and risk it all again once its all over) :p
 
When I was 16 I ate a few hash brownies not realizing just how much I'd taken. I ended up losing control and after calling 999 and being taken to the local A&E I started to flip out and go nuts. I literally lost control of my actions and ended up singing and dancing like an idiot right in the middle of the A&E department floor surrounded by loads ofdoctors and nurses who were convinced I'd taken something like magic mushrooms or LSD rather than just weed. As much as I wanted to stop, I just couldn't. It was as if I was a mere spectator and someone else was in control of my actions. The helplessness I felt led to just more panic and more bizarre behavior. Not only was it embarrassing but it put me off trying cannabis for years.

Now I'm careful to not smoke more than I'm comfortable with. I have a golden rule of taking one or two puffs from a joint, waiting 15 mins and repeating until I reach a point that I'm comfortable with. The choice of strain also helps, as does ensuring I only smoke nicely cured weed that's been grown and prepared properly

I can't help notice that the way I respond to the effects of a lot of drugs is atypical. Like the time I was in opiate withdrawal and I couldn't stop myself from looking up towards the sky for hours, as if I was having muscle spasms in my neck (which I wasn't). Up until now nobody, not even doctors, have been able to explain why that happened to me.
 
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GeekTweak.0 said:
I am glad to have more new information for myself on this matter. Just a somewhat off-topic question: During those 7 months, how many months in were you actually able to enjoy life again? Like i said im only at month 3, and my anxiety/schizophrenic-like symptoms are gone for the most part, but i still feel pretty miserable. No emotions still, little enjoyment out of life. My general mood tends to fluctuate rapidly between feeling "good" to feeling generally anxious, depressed, lethargic/apathetic, and just foggy headed. I am not sure if you have had all of these same symptoms, but it would be comforting to know if and/or when you started to feel "normal/happy" again.

(kinda funny hows i will want to smoke and risk it all again once its all over) :p
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This may sound weird but for me it went on and off which really sucked, meaning I would be extremely derealized and then about 4 months in, it started to fade in and out. I would think "YES! I AM HEALED!" I would feel normal and then BOOM out of no where a few hours later the derealization would kick right back in.

Each day was better, however it would be worse on some days than other for some reason, I dont know why. I was not completely satisfied until the 7th month mark where it went away completely. It got easier and easier day by day and was generally in a better mood each day but I would slope back down when I thought "Damn, 6 months in and I still feel stoned/out of it from only one smoke session, I really fucked myself up" This generally brought me down and made me feel more derealized.

It really felt bad when I would read of people on the internet who got better after 4 months, 3 months etc. and I was 6 months in not feeling any better, until magically it drifts away.

It is different healing time for everyone, read about a guy who had it for 2 years. Your brain is basically taking the nutrients you are giving the body to heal itself and readjust the chemical imbalance that Marijuana created. Eating healthy, and I also heard a strictly juice diet speeds up the process extremely.

I also might add that it was not until I said "Fuck it, I guess I am stuck like this forever" It was not until I completely accepted that this was part of me, and I stopped worrying and thinking about it, that crazily, it just went away on its on. So it is a bit mental too man.
 
Thanks a ton bro for all the information. it is definitally easing the stress of my mental health. i definitally have a WAY bad diet (frozen pizzas and burritos, and ranch. oh so much ranch!, although i DID stop drinking soda).

Just another question if ya dont mind: at the beginning of the "healing process", did you have any form of a thought disorder? for me all thought processes almost completely halted, and i was terrified to fall asleep because i would have this (not audible, but still) incoherent mumbling, talking, etc. in my head and sometimes it would turn into screaming and i swear almost become audible. i had to fall asleep with something in the background, staying up until i just passed out watching south park or something. sometimes i would even have a random or even scary closed eye visual in my head. these always happened to me high(back when i could still enjoy it), but when lying in bed SOBER, even though it was only on a few occasions, it was definitally scary. I had thought i had given myself schizophrenia, which i kinda had, but all those psychotic symptoms have for the most part passed, although i am still kind of regaining my old way of thinking back.
Also cant drink caffeine, not even a quarter bottle of coke. Gives me anxiety attacks through the roof. as does alcohol, too much sugar, and nicotine.

So my question is:
A:did you have any of the psychotic symptoms like me? also Did your fragile state of mind from the weed over-use prevent you from drinking caffeinated beverages as well as alcoholic beverages?
B:if so, were you ever able to drink/eat those triggers again?


Sorry to be so overwhelming and stuff i'd just like to get to the bottom of this. Im sure you can relate... :/
 
at the end of the day...its just pot..mind over matter...i have panic disorder that is kept in check by paxil....when you dont get that high you dont know what it feels like and you get nervous a freak it...dont be afraid to smoke after that...reach that height again...except enjoy it this time because you know its coming
 
GeekTweak.0 said:
Thanks a ton bro for all the information. it is definitally easing the stress of my mental health. i definitally have a WAY bad diet (frozen pizzas and burritos, and ranch. oh so much ranch!, although i DID stop drinking soda).

Just another question if ya dont mind: at the beginning of the "healing process", did you have any form of a thought disorder? for me all thought processes almost completely halted, and i was terrified to fall asleep because i would have this (not audible, but still) incoherent mumbling, talking, etc. in my head and sometimes it would turn into screaming and i swear almost become audible. i had to fall asleep with something in the background, staying up until i just passed out watching south park or something. sometimes i would even have a random or even scary closed eye visual in my head. these always happened to me high(back when i could still enjoy it), but when lying in bed SOBER, even though it was only on a few occasions, it was definitally scary. I had thought i had given myself schizophrenia, which i kinda had, but all those psychotic symptoms have for the most part passed, although i am still kind of regaining my old way of thinking back.
Also cant drink caffeine, not even a quarter bottle of coke. Gives me anxiety attacks through the roof. as does alcohol, too much sugar, and nicotine.

So my question is:
A:did you have any of the psychotic symptoms like me? also Did your fragile state of mind from the weed over-use prevent you from drinking caffeinated beverages as well as alcoholic beverages?
B:if so, were you ever able to drink/eat those triggers again?


Sorry to be so overwhelming and stuff i'd just like to get to the bottom of this. Im sure you can relate... :/
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To answer your two questions:

1.) Yes, at the very beginning I had the psychotic symptoms. Not psychotic, but like the feelings I got while I was high, such as the shocks of random paranoia while trying to sleep, transferred into sobriety. I know exactly what you are talking about. One time I tried to even close my eyes and drift off into sleep and I would hear random screams in my thoughts or deep in my head, not audible, but I could feel as though those voices were real. This halted however almost immediately after I stopped smoking, like one week after stopped burning this type of shit went away. But the anxiety/derealization remained.

2.) Havent had the stimulant induced panic.
 
Hey thanks for all the info. all very helpful. I actually hear all of those symptoms(derealization/depersonalization, and even those hypnogic hallucinations we had) were actually not considered to be psychotic symptoms. just thought it was relieving and somewhat intersting.
 
Chee$e said:
To answer your two questions:

1.) Yes, at the very beginning I had the psychotic symptoms. Not psychotic, but like the feelings I got while I was high, such as the shocks of random paranoia while trying to sleep, transferred into sobriety. I know exactly what you are talking about. One time I tried to even close my eyes and drift off into sleep and I would hear random screams in my thoughts or deep in my head, not audible, but I could feel as though those voices were real. This halted however almost immediately after I stopped smoking, like one week after stopped burning this type of shit went away. But the anxiety/derealization remained.

2.) Havent had the stimulant induced panic.
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I remember the night before i woke up into full on DP/DR after taking way to many pills the prev 2 days ( think i ate like 10 high quality pills or something), trying to sleep i would have full on CEV's of ambulance lights on my eyelids, it was actually blinding, i had to squint with my eyes closed, and i would also hear the siren blaring constantly in my ear. Its also the first time i experienced the brain zaps often related to messing with your seritonin. AS i was drifting off to sleep id get zaped wide awake again, it sucked. The zaps actually started earlier in the day while at work, right after i ate this weird scone. I was stressing thinking the scone was poisoned or some shit. The zaps also felt like a mini seazure, i could actually notice a seconds worth of lost time each time it happened. This experience is the reason i stopped that mdma forever. Fucking with your emotion, which makes you human, seems really stupid.
 
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