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  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | Eligiu | deficiT | paranoid android

I'm fucked up at 15.

yeah. the good thing about your situation is, if your parents aren't doing enough, you can report them to social services. it is their moral obligation to do so. if not, then I would call 911 immediately until you get placed into appropriate care. you deserve to have all the amenities available to you because you can't legally work. if you were a little bit older, the situation would be much different as your parents can tell you to fuck off if you are over 18. luckily you are still 15. you can dickride. ride that dick until you can't anymore. you have a 3 year reprieve to get your shit together and think about what you are going to do. if you were 18, i would tell you to fend for yourself, but you are still young. listen, go to school and do what you have to do. you have so much free time yo.
 
Thank you guys for the replies.

I've been doing better recently toothpastedog, thanks for asking. How about you? Feeling up or down in the dumps?

Can't express my appreciation enough.
 
^I'm glad you are doing a bit better Nix. I just think you are such a sweet and interesting guy. I feel that you do have the resources to come to grips with the issues you are facing. It may take a while, and you'll have to get good at patience too ;), but your enquiring and introspective mind is seriously the greatest tool you have to dig your way back to somewhere you want to be. :)

I think Herby's advice, besides being absolutely beautiful and poetic, is something well worth taking on board too. <3
 
Yeah, to me everything you are saying about your life and environment - and your emotional response to it - makes perfect sense.
I didn't experience the real joys of life until i left my dysfunctional family and made my own "family" of friends and acquaintances.

15 is a tough age. Things can - and i have no doubt will - get better though.
Just be careful with the opiates. They can negate negative emotions a little too well. So much so that you stop working on making your life better...because addiction focuses your attention solely on your next fix.

I got some really good advice as a depressed teenager - "you need to go out and have fun!"
I took this advice, sought out all the fun i could, and built a really happy life for myself.
That was many years ago now, but don't downplay your emotional struggles. They're very real and very challenging.
The key for me was to stop indulging my unhappiness - and instead telling it to fuck off and leave me alone.

Sometimes i need to remind myself of this, but it usually works out ok. The struggle goes on, but it is worth fighting to be a happier person.
Your family relationships - like some of mine - seem very unhealthy. It wont be long before you'll have no reason to rely on these people any more or to have to follow arbitrary rules. Just try not to get too caught up in it, hard aa that may be. It will pass.
 
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Nix i am impressed by your way with words and grammar.
If you need to talk do not hesitate to pm me ... I know someone (a family) member in a situation close to yours
I'm the same when it comes to "living with the weight of the world " on my shoulders . I have little to no relationship with my mom. She gave me more self worth issues then I deserved. I joined the military to be a peacekeeper and gained confidence. Don't do that lol
It makes my heart hurt to hear of a young man in so much pain:)
Be well and please pm me if you wish to talk
And remember your a unique important person no matter how you feel. Hell you could be the person to cure addiction, your kids may end hunger. Your young with your life ahead of you. Know your important ok:)
 
I know how you feel nix, I never had a psychologist so I'd constantly lose my self in deep, philosophical thinking or I could even be thinking about simple, trivial matters for hours on end simply because I had no one to talk to. For years I though that made me weird and I never spoke about it even though I went out a lot but now I realise it's the best thing I have - the continuous over-thinking of everything due to anxiety and depression made me think about who I was and come up with realistic goals for who I wanted to be. Take a step back, think how you want your life to plan out (even if that means using drugs recreationally) and most of all accept that people like your parents may never fully come to terms with you - do your own thing.
 
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