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I'm 37 and still a VIrgin!?

Markomarkh

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 18, 2013
Messages
510
Hi all yes I'm 37 and still a big V, I will 38 next year in January and not really had a propa relationship with a girl or woman in my life time! I'm I a rare breed or is there more people like me than I think. I had moments where I've been offered it and times it could of happened, I've even tried to do it at 13 back in early 90s, with two girls who were just friends under a willow tree but nothing really happened much because I didn't really understand what I was doing and didn't get turned on by it. I often dream of getting a nice woman young twenties slim and all that but am I too old for that now. I find most women my own age 37 not very attractive and think I should just forget about getting a wife or partner! Anybody else in this situation or what are your thoughts?
 
It's not that big of a deal, clearly you agree. Just enjoy your life and be happy
 
Why do you think you're too old to have a woman in her 20s? There are younger women who are attracted to a guy your age. Don't give up hope. If you're really interested, look for the type of woman you want and date around. See what's out there. I don't think it's a big deal you're a virgin.
 
He has to start somewhere, just like anyone else. Once he gets some experience, he'll be fine.
 
If you can find a good partner it can be worth it. Sadly, with 99 out of 100 people you will meet, you're better off living alone like a monk or priest. If you feel lonely, get a pet. Some people find that doing opiates helps, but that carries its own risks.
 
Hi all yes I'm 37 and still a big V, I will 38 next year in January and not really had a propa relationship with a girl or woman in my life time!

I have a friend in exactly same age and situation as you are in. He has unrealistic expectations towards women, life in general and himself. He's only interested in young girls with 9/10 looks, says that he wants the best and anything short of best is not good enough for him. To me this point of view on realtionships is just childish and detached form reality. His "all or nothing" attitude, considering that he himself is far from being perfect (average looks, shitty job, living in parents basement, no self esteem, no confidence), prevents him from learnig how to be with someone and care for someone. It's like he's got lost in dreams of perfect life that exist only inside his head and doesn't want to let it go.

I often dream of getting a nice woman young twenties slim and all that but am I too old for that now. I find most women my own age 37 not very attractive and think I should just forget about getting a wife or partner!

That two sentences make me think your problems might have similar sources.
 
He says he wants wife/partner. I don't think loosing V to a prostitute would help him with that.
 
try online dating. all you have to do is message women you like saying "hey I liked your profile, would you like to chat?" DO NOT: compliment their looks until after a few messages exchanged DO: comment on something like their hobbies if you can.

this was the formula for success. the online dating game is an endless supply of women.


about the age thing....unless you are rich or ripped and very fit. you will not get 20 year olds that are slim.. Thats the ting about getting older....your prospects get older too.

if it makes you feel better women in their 20s are awful to date (i'm early thirties). They are shallow and will cheat on you most of the time.
 
The biggest turn off wouldn't be your age, it will be that you fuck like a virgin

I fuck like a virgin. Women don't give a fuck. They just want to be desired. So I vouch, the age could be the bigger issue.

@OP : If you don't have moral standards, just find a call girl in your preferred age group. Should not be that expensive. In any case less expensive than financing a ~20 years old for being around for a while.
 
try online dating. all you have to do is message women you like saying "hey I liked your profile, would you like to chat?" DO NOT: compliment their looks until after a few messages exchanged DO: comment on something like their hobbies if you can.

this was the formula for success. the online dating game is an endless supply of women.


about the age thing....unless you are rich or ripped and very fit. you will not get 20 year olds that are slim.. Thats the ting about getting older....your prospects get older too.

if it makes you feel better women in their 20s are awful to date (i'm early thirties). They are shallow and will cheat on you most of the time.

Fuck you man, I'm in my 20s and I'm not shallow, and I've never cheated. Don't take your bad experiences and suggest all women are like that. Also I have a friend who's 35, he's not a virgin, but id totally go out with him if I weren't already taken (I don't cheat you see). He's also dirt poor, average looking, and I'm not fat.

People are more complex than you make out, and generalizations are not universal truths.
 
Don't do it man. You never know when it's going to happen. I met a guy who was perfect for me and we have been together now for 5 years. It was a total and complete fluke. The tiniest thing could have easily resulted in me not meeting him. I absolutely promise you there is a perfect woman for you out there. And you will find her, but only if you're alive. You don't even have to be trying, sometimes when the time is right, it just happens. But only for the living. I promise you, your woman is out there, you just have to find her.

There are too many people in the world for anyone to need to be alone. Everyone has someone for them out there waiting. Don't give up, you could be so close. I met the love of my live not even a month after I tried to kill myself. If I hadn't been stopped, I would have missed out on the love of my life, and he would have missed out on me.

I know it seems impossible now, but I can promise you, your life, anyone's life, can change for good or bad in an instant, and forever alter the rest of your life.

I'm a long term IV heroin addict, I have ptsd and all sorts of serious emotional problems. When I found my soulmate, I was homeless, I'd just tried to kill myself and ran away from home after my mom discovered my IV heroin use. I tried to kill myself simply because id had one really bad day. If that day hasn't happened,none of the great things that happened to me after would have. I could never have known I was so soon close to finding him.

If I can find someone, anyone can, you can, no matter how impossible it sounds, it's not. And there's lots of people here including me that want to help you. You're welcome to PM or skype me anytime. Any time you feel down or alone, I promise, if I can, ill listen. And there are others here too who I know want to help you too.

Don't give up man.
 
My only advice is don't stop caring and don't give up, trust me eventually it'll consume you and make you dead inside.

I'm not a virgin I lost mine at 18 and ironically when my marriage ended in 1998 so did my sex life, a year after that ended all forms of physical contact with women. I'm attracted to women of all age (within reason) but even if I was capable of dating I would be completely lost when it came to sex, communication, basically everything. I don't leave my apt other than for work and groceries. My only dating experience is with teenage girls and the oldest women I've slept with was 21 and that was my wife.
 
Well, I can't say I blame you about doctors. I've had bad experiences with them too so I can understand your feelings about them. With time ive cooled down but there was a time I would have said of them just as you did.

Is it possible you're meeting the wrong sort of girls for the kind of guy you are?

I'm not interested in what would be described as "normal people", and I doubt they would be interested in me either. Is it possible that some of the problem is you're trying to act normal and attract normal women, when in fact you're not normal (which there's nothing wrong with, I'm not normal, fuck normal people) and should be going after girls that are abnormal too? All the best people ive ever met and liked have been people mainstream society would consider castoffs, rejects, losers, whatever. I hate mainstream superficial shit and I'm wondering if part of the problem is you're going after mainstream chicks, and mainstream people generally suck.
 
Thousands on nutritional suppliments, you do know that you only need a finite amount of nutrition and if you eat well as you say, you don't need more. He'll some nutrients are harmful in higher dosages.

I'm sorry I don't want to be argumentative. I just fear some people, I'm not saying you, but some people, overuse nutritional supplements because they fall victim to charlatans peddling snake oil working in marketing. Good nutrition is important,very important. But generally if you're eating well, generally healthy,and not elderly, it isn't very hard to get more than adequate amounts of essential nutrients for the body to function at it's best. I don't know what you take, some drugs, mainly I'm thinking of nitrous oxide, impair the bodies ability to process some vitamins like b12, others cause you to eat less, either of which could validly warrant nutritional supplements. I don't know your specific circumstances or reasons so I certainly can't say taking nutritional supplements isn't a perfectly sensible decision, I just hope it is. Too many people fall victim to so many snake oil peddling opportunists.

No not everyone will want to help, and many more won't be able too, but there are many compassionate people here who would want to help however they can.
You seem like a smart guy, which is more what I meant by abnormal. You see, to me, I think being abnormal is a good thing. I generally dislike what I would call normal people, or perhaps a more accurate description would be people who obsess with being seen to be normal and value normal materialistic things. To me, normal is not the same as good. The abnormal, people with real problems, addictions, depression, poverty, or quite likely in your case, above average intelligence, are often the best kind of people ive met. I would argue that intelligence itself is abnormal and that that's a good thing. But it often means unfortunately people like us who aren't the norm find ourselves feeling isolated and alone. By definition, most people will be normal people, and the abnormal will generally find it difficult to find other people who understand them. I tend to think it's better to accept, and indeed embrace our abnormalities and stop seeking what society tells us we should want. I think people who find themselves unlike the mainstream will be much better serves and much happier in rejecting the established norms and finding their own kind of people. Embracing their differences as often either superior, or providing greater insight into human kind, society. And that our closest friends will be best found among other people who share similar differences.

I would even go so far as to say I would feel somewhat insulted by being called normal. I didn't always feel this way, like almost everyone, I wanted to be normal for a long time in my life, it took my a long time to realize that what I wanted wasn't worth having. I felt rejected by mainstream society for a long time and eventually I found that accepting, and eventually preferring to be one of the outcasts was where I would find acceptance of my own situation, and over time I increasingly came to see that the norm, the desires of the majority, were all things I rejected, and so it's little wonder I have little in common with them.

So my suggestion that you might be abnormal shouldn't be taken as negative, I certainly don't mean it that way. It's a compliment to me if anything. To me normal is to want the material, to want status, to want admiration not for what is truly good about you but for your material wealth, status, power, etc. Rather than to want to be liked and accepted because of what to me is all that really counts for a persons value. Which is if you are a good person and want to help people. I admire the bum on the street that helps out the other bums far more than I value how much money someone makes or their job or their wealth or their status.
 
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I can chime in and say I learned a lesson about being slightly more forward too. Turns out i went to a bar with my friends just fora trivia night ended up getting really drunk, not that i recommend this, and then hearing stories about how i was hitting on this girl (though very inappropriately) and she just kept joking about it. I was literally like "shit dude and that girl didnt slap the shit out of me for behaving like that..." I mean next time i wont get so drunk and be so inappropriate but it literally showed me that what holds me back is me. Here I am all afraid to approach women let i black out and start hitting on as my friends put it "the hottest chick in the bar" literally woke up and was like WTF i know i was saying "this is trumps america time to disrespect women!" as a joke but i definitely accidentally embodied it and was not slapped for it which i am still amazed at.

Very embarrassing to hear i was definitely being disrespectful but she either understood or enjoyed the attention for the moment. Point being dont get all into your own head, i now know if i approach the "hottest girl at the bar" i can actually win. Like the girl in question even apparently invited us to a different bar... i must have spent hours grabbing that girls ass and having her not do anything to stop me. The real me is like "god how embarrassing at least i can say i was drunk" but the other me is like "yeah i definitely stand behind my decision for the evening (she is very attractive)" Never doing that again but that was the level of aggressive hitting on that i needed to hear i did and not have it end badly to understand its all me holding me back. I mean if she didnt at least not mind me she would have slapped me, i mean she even said that LOL. Talk about lowering the bar for myself god, like i said im extremely embarrassed i behaved in such a fashion completely out of line with who i am.

Again i do NOT recommend what i did but it really opened my eyes to how i just need to approach the girl at the bar... perhaps actually giving the better parts of my personality will yield something slightly better then a free ass grab pass for an evening.

Go me i suppose.. I needed the realization i just kinda wish the lesson wasnt learned the following morning but rather as it was occurring.
 
I think people like us are fucking worthless losers, and it is unfortunate that there isn't a death squad hunting down all the 30+ virgins and ridding the earth of our useless pathetic flesh.
 
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