• Life Advice & Visual Arts Welcome Guest
    Posting Rules Bluelight Rules
    🌌 Share Your Dreams! 🌌
    📸 15 Years of Photo Contests 📸
  • LAVA Moderator: Mysterier

If you were in pain you wouldn't be in a good mood.

Barrenian

Barrenian

Bluelighter
Joined
Aug 1, 2015
Messages
35
I have heard this from people before, and it is total bullshit. I can smile, joke around, and even laugh all while being in terrible pain. I realised that after my doctor visit, in which I was very emotional and teary eyed, that when i went into the waiting room to schedule an appointment i was able to smile and joke around with the two front desk receptionists who were so friendly that they could put a smile on the sickest face. What I didn't realise until later was that there was a doctor standing in the distance watching my every fucking move to see if my pain was genuine. I don't know if that is what she was really doing, but I think it was. This is total bs. I feel like a doctors visit is a freaking inquisition. I am living proof that people in chronic pain can laugh and smile all while being in pain.

The reason I was emotional with the doctors was because I have to share very personal and intimate information with them, and that on top of the chronic pain just leads to emotional overload. When talking with normal every day people I can't get emotional, I have to be as jovial as possible! I think these doctors are really naive or something, because their witch hunt for drug seekers is fucking up their judgement!

Chronic pain people, can you laugh and smile all while being in pain?
 
Whenever my Pokemon are low on hp and in pain, i withdraw them immediately so they don't have to endure it any longer. If i made them do it though, they would still preform for me, so i think sick people would still be able to at least smile and laugh occasionally.
 
Indeed, everyone deals with pain differently. I present a strong façade of perfection to the professional world. I don't dare allow my "blood" in the water, as my career is extremely cut throat. I don't show my real self to family either, because they devour the weak. When I leave the privacy of my home, I have mastered the façade. You cannot look at me and see the train wreck that is inside.

I have a sub-humanly high threshold for pain. This comes from childhood/teens of being beaten like an animal (by my mom). I was not allowed to cry or whimper or complain. Otherwise she'd beat me more. I truly think that's why I can handle such horrific pain that would put most folks face down.

When I finally surrendered and waved the white flag to enroll in PM...The doctor wanted me to go straight to Fentanyl patches. I refused because I didn't want to hit the top of the ladder, with no options except JUMP! He asked my "HOW have you endured such pain for decades without opiates?" Well, I felt I had to BECAUSE I MUST function at a very high level, pain and all. Whether you think you can or you think you can't...YOU ARE RIGHT.

I've not yet found any pain med combo that brings relief without deal-breaking SEs. I have no quality of life, no real sense of JOY. Of course I can laugh and engage in conversation...all a part of the façade of perfection and "normalcy". IME no one wants to be around people who are sick or in pain. I suffer in silence.

I have no doubt that if I entered a doctor's office/ER with a slashed femoral artery...They would RUSH to "fix" the life-threatening issue. However, in my case, I'm not bleeding out. I look perfectly fine...until/unless you review the CTs, MRIs, Bone Scans, USs, surgery reports, wiki-length medical records.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top