dance2tranz- i can't believe the similarities! when i went to sleep i had the exact same thing! i thought i would stop breathing cuz my body would forget how. then i would concentrate too much on my breathing and i almost would forget how to breath. at that point there was no way i could sleep cuz i was too scared. or if i did fall asleep by chance i would get that same falling feeling. there was a couple times when i was sleeping soundly and literally jumped out of my bed waving my hands frantically in the air. sounds weird, i know.....
and i related everything to my e use. if i had a headache, it was because of e. the headache wouldn't go away either because i was concentrating sooo much on it. so here i am with a headache for a week- then i assume i have a tumour or something! i know how ridiculous this all sounds, but thats how your mind works when you're paranoid. for a month straight i had "something" wrong with me. lets see.....lung cancer, an ulcer, a heart defect......or at least i convinced myself i did. and it was all because of e- or so i thought.
and you know what- now that i'm taking anti-depressants all my "illnesses" have gone away. i actually feel normal again. and i can't tell you how happy i am. living with severe anxiety, depression and paranoia is absolute torture. i wanted to die.
and yes, i realize this won't happen to everyone who uses. but from what i've read on the board a lot of people seem to be using heavily- and i'm warning you: this could quite possibly happen to you too. i NEVER thought anything bad could come from e. when this happened i lost control of my thoughts......i had to leave my job because i couldn't deal with it anymore. luckily i have good friends who stuck by me.
and i related everything to my e use. if i had a headache, it was because of e. the headache wouldn't go away either because i was concentrating sooo much on it. so here i am with a headache for a week- then i assume i have a tumour or something! i know how ridiculous this all sounds, but thats how your mind works when you're paranoid. for a month straight i had "something" wrong with me. lets see.....lung cancer, an ulcer, a heart defect......or at least i convinced myself i did. and it was all because of e- or so i thought.
and you know what- now that i'm taking anti-depressants all my "illnesses" have gone away. i actually feel normal again. and i can't tell you how happy i am. living with severe anxiety, depression and paranoia is absolute torture. i wanted to die.
and yes, i realize this won't happen to everyone who uses. but from what i've read on the board a lot of people seem to be using heavily- and i'm warning you: this could quite possibly happen to you too. i NEVER thought anything bad could come from e. when this happened i lost control of my thoughts......i had to leave my job because i couldn't deal with it anymore. luckily i have good friends who stuck by me.