I'm sorry u are feeling like this.way too many of us have been here and some make it out quicker than others, some not at all..I have a few questions that will help the fellow BLers and I help u out the best we can
how old are u? Many ppl from late teens to 20s go thru a sort of existence crisis and even older ppl can be in this mindset..can happen anytime really just when u are transferring from young adult to adiult the problem can be more pronounced.do u suffer from any mental disorders?..it can be overwhelming trying to deal with life and even tougher if your mind isn't working on its optimal level or circuits are crossed.
what helped me is Buddhism..learning that suffering is part of the human experience..expectations and judging can make life harder than it has to be..the conditions of our environment has a lot to do with the level of satisfaction we get on a daily basis.
humans now don't really get all of natures built in rewards because we are basically still hunter/gatherers/farmers with highly advanced technologies.we are not out in beautiful nature living as I believe we should be, we are stuck in our box goin from box to box in a box on wheels.
.I hope u get better and one day look back at this time in your life and u learned how to be a better person and enjoy life to the fullest..best of luck my brother...or sister..lol %)