I don't know how longer i can keep up with this

[nznity]

Crushing poverty. Crippling diseases. But this isn't my thread thanks though

You're not alone. Going Through something similar atm. But, there's always light at the end of the tunnel.

 

[stayUpallN1ght]

You're not alone. Going Through something similar atm. But, there's always light at the end of the tunnel.

Man I don't know you, but I got to let you know that I haven't been doing great with my BPD and this time of year. I hadn't made exact plans but I didn't plan to be around much longer. Thankfully there is people like you who got me to hold my breath till the last post on the thread showed you didn't do it. Goes a long way

 

[Jnowhere]

This time of the year sucks, and the cold and overcast came early this year. This time of the year messes with me too. I am alone depressed and miserable. I have shit to deal with but that's life. Vitamin d helps. Death may seem like an easy answer, but suicide ain't the answer. Please try to not dwell on the negatives of life, and do what you can better your situation. Spring hopefully will come soon, but until then hang in there. I was supposed to be dead years ago, sometimes I mad that I am alive, then I snap out of it, and realize that the doctors were wrong, and realize I have a second chance, besides the feelings of hopelessness and despair are usually gone after a while.
My sister's drug overdose was ruled a suicide, even though she had problems( medically and was on a lot of meds, I am sort of not sure if suicide or her abusing her meds. In any case, please don't do anything impulsive. You will only leave pain and misery for those who care about you.

 

[yubacity]

Hey guys,
Long time since I've posted something on the forum. I'm not doing very well lately. My physical health has been declining for the past year and I feel utterly desperate. All I feel every day is sorrow and despair. I've gone into a very dark deep spiral for the last 2 years. I'm still heavy addicted to opiates but try to keep my doses at the bare minimum. I'm just keeping the wds at bay, opiates are the only thing that seem to help a bit with my mood and crippling depression. Lately, I've been ruminating a lot about suicide and ending my life. I think about it at least 20 times a day, I'm broke, Ill and my stress is through the roof. My life is fucked up beyond repair...idk, I keep questioning If it's really worth it to keep going.
Perhaps, this is a desperate call for some words of encouragement and help before I seriously do some crazy shit like harm myself but I don't think I'd die anyway, I'm too weak to even successfully accomplish something like that. I'm broke asf, lonely and trapped in a super fucking horrible snowball. Meh, guess I'm looking for some Sympathy at least.
Hope everyone is doing well and wish u guys would help me with some words at least(like I've done my fair share of helping others in the past here). Happy holidays for everyone. I love you guys,
From the bottom of My heart
Sincerely,
Nick.

My brother if opiates bring do mood carry on not something I normally say but knowing you for a while here and the type of good clean opiates u can get no judgement here

As some one who has atte.pted suicide and who lost his loved cousin to it dont my brother as low as life can get there are also highs if you commit suicide thats final and you will leave your loved ones with pain sorrow and question there will be a high message me any yi.e u want I have known u here for few years your a good person anytime my brother

 

[JackARoe]

I'm craving Vitamin D, but my condition won't permit even that. wish I could at least Seat at the park for a couple hrs everyday. But I'm stuck with this.

Just read the thread Nico. You can bet a lot of us, if we lived in the area would grab you and take you out. It is kind of sad that people that would be inclined to do that are usually far away from the person. Someday we will be able to click on a post and be in the room as the person that posted. For now we are stuck with correspondence. But this did not even exist some years back. People were stuck with postal letters that took months. By the time someone else reads it who knows what could happen.

Glad you are still here Nico. And I know there have been a few posts over the years where life gets heavy and death seems the way out. And it is but it has to be in its proper time. Too soon and It would be like dropping out of high school. Then you need a GED. No easy way out. Might as well stick it out. Come here, post and take things day by day. And know some of us would come and get you and sit out in Nature if we could. And Nature says a lot. The caterpillar sheds it's broken body and flies away. Keep that faith. For now we are all stuck trodding through the mud.

I hope you feel better than when you posted. Life makes no logical sense. So we have to sometimes put the mind down and stick with the heart.

 

[nznity]

My brother if opiates bring do mood carry on not something I normally say but knowing you for a while here and the type of good clean opiates u can get no judgement here

As some one who has atte.pted suicide and who lost his loved cousin to it dont my brother as low as life can get there are also highs if you commit suicide thats final and you will leave your loved ones with pain sorrow and question there will be a high message me any yi.e u want I have known u here for few years your a good person anytime my brother

Thank you @yubacity @JackARoe broooSs for the kind
Wordssss. Much to u guys
im on a much better place rn. I randomly met this girl...she's making me fix my life, GOD IS GREAT MAN
So I went on a fast kratom taper 4th January, the first 3 days were uncomfy but I'm just on pregabalin now, I went through 70 grams of fucking medicinal red Bali shit from 120mg of morphine pills/iv.
Shit, I don't wanna stick a needle in me anymore, my trackmarks are healing, I'm still wding a lil but much better. Everything is getting back in place, I know the way I gotta follow. Love heals everything.
Thank you guys

 

[AngelsandFairiesarereal]

Thank you @yubacity @JackARoe broooSs for the kind
Wordssss. Much to u guys
im on a much better place rn. I randomly met this girl...she's making me fix my life, GOD IS GREAT MAN
So I went on a fast kratom taper 4th January, the first 3 days were uncomfy but I'm just on pregabalin now, I went through 70 grams of fucking medicinal red Bali shit from 120mg of morphine pills/iv.
Shit, I don't wanna stick a needle in me anymore, my trackmarks are healing, I'm still wding a lil but much better. Everything is getting back in place, I know the way I gotta follow. Love heals everything.
Thank you guys