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I can't stop missing my ex I feel so heart broken its destroying my life

Higherfocus420

Higherfocus420

Bluelighter
Joined
Apr 25, 2020
Messages
662
I've been away from my ex my love if my life for nearly a year now and I can't get over her it's making my drug problem so worse and I know it's not the answer Ive tried to pursue other relationships but it's not the same I need some help and advice before I kill myself
 
G_Chem said:
What are some of the details of the relationship, maybe we can remind you why she isn’t for you.. ;)

-GC
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She wouldn't be with me for my violent behaviour I have severe adhd
But the best years of my life was with her she understand me we were complete I can't get over her ?¿
 
jane douloureux said:
Can you go to therapy and/or anger management are you on the right medication? Then you can tell her that you are doing these things for her to make her feel safer? That you want to change and are changing?

i understand exactly how you feel
its awful
my situation is similar and it has made my drug and more recently alcohol use become extreme
I think about offing myself too but I think i will be reincarnated and it will all be worse
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Yea I miss her soo much no girl will compare oh well lesson learnt hate life
 
It's ok no dramas I'm a catch so on to the next gal think I'm gonna quit drugs tho I've just recovered from a crack and heroin addiction
 
Lesson learnt should be get your behaviors under control. Talking from experience people can be very forgiving if you actually put in the work. No one should have to put up with violent behavior. Even if you fix yourself and she doesn’t come back, you’ll at least be in a place to actually have a relationship with another.

-GC
 
G_Chem said:
Lesson learnt should be get your behaviors under control. Talking from experience people can be very forgiving if you actually put in the work. No one should have to put up with violent behavior. Even if you fix yourself and she doesn’t come back, you’ll at least be in a place to actually have a relationship with another.

-GC
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Yes how do cure impsivity my main problem
 
My gf and me are together for about 25 yrs by now, we connect on a really transcendental level, we share lots of the same sometimes both very specific as well ls particular interests, hobbies, preferences and so on and in the things we do differ we always seem to complete each other, we are both very loving, caring, understanding and warm ppl and tho we both really need one another we still give each other a lot of freedom, she really is the one and only person I fully trust in every way, also we really never fight, sometimes there can be some sort of argument but we seem unable to get mad at each other, it also is not in either our nature to really get mad in general... I love her to death and there is not one doubt in my mind she feels the same way, she is my compagnon for life, my soulmate, I would be lost without her...

So I can imagine how you must feel having lost what I assume was the love of your life, but you must remember one thing very clearly,.no matter how special and unique such a love may appear to be, due to the huge amount of girls that you could possibly end up with next and due to the equally huge diversity of both lovable and desireble qualities these girls must have, sooner or later - it might take a.bit searching but no worries, the journy itself also determines the eventual outcome - you will once again find the love of your life, and at this point you will find youre love for her to be of an even greater significance than with your previous love...


And realize this: this is not me trying to make you feel good, no, this is the most realistic scenario of what you can expect from your future and I am so overly confident about all this that without a problem I dare state this to be nothing less than a fact of which Im also sure you will at least see how reasonable this is, and you should always trust in reason.
 
As long as you don't realize we're born alone and learn to be comfortable alone with yourself you won't have grown enough, yes having someone on your side is good but they can come and go as please, so just be ok with it.
 
I felt this way too, albeit, perhaps, to a lesser extent, but then I met the right new person, and it faded into the background. Keep an open mind, that new person could come seemingly out of nowhere.
 
Higherfocus420 said:
Yes how do cure impsivity my main problem
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How does this situation present itself? Is it accompanied by a nagging voice or intrusive thoughts? If yes, you can use these thoughts as ammunition against themselves. When the thought presents itself, ask yourself "Why do I think this way?" It's not going to be an easy question to answer but it must be done. You might have to repeatedly ask yourself this question until you understand the underlying issues you are having. In fact, it might take years to fully understand yourself and even when you do the problem doesn't exactly disappear...it does get easier though.

Put in the work, and when the intrusive thoughts come back you can be more prepared for them because you've already answered the tough questions. You may not ever get rid of the thoughts, but the thoughts will no longer have as much power over you. You can take your life back. It's yours, you know?
 
My wife died while I was giving her CPR, so no chance of even talking to her again, even as just a friend. Concern yourself with bits of your life that you can do something about and the pain gradually subsides (be warned, this is not a quick fix solution, by any means, but probably the healthiest one regarding your emotions (I'm still a work in progress 😁)
 
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