Recovery I can't go on, I'll go on

[Stargazer]

Thinking of you Sim.
Like chompy, I'm trying to keep putting one foot in front of the other.

Hope you're well.

 

[simco]

I have decided that it's time to retire this thread. I'm going to close it after I write this entry.

Writing this journal and reading input from others has been a huge boon for my recovery. I hope it has helped or at least entertained at least a few other folks too. Maybe still others will find it later and enjoy it; I hope so.

I'm not ending this journal because I've finished anything in particular or even reached any specific milestone. Really it just feels like a reasonable time to move onto other kinds of reading and writing on BL (I'll still be around on SL). And besides, nothing lasts forever.

I started writing this when I was in a fight for my life. I'm still in that fight. I think I've gotten better at handling the adversity that my fondness for drugs and self-destruction raises. But that fondness is still very real and very active. At this particular moment, it's been about three months since the last time I used. I try every day to do what's in the best interest of my recovery. Some days I succeed and some days I mess up. Nowadays, I tend to succeed in this goal more often than I mess up, so in that sense, I'm proud of my recovery, and I feel like I am getting better.

Lastly, the name of this thread--I can't go on, I'll go on--is a line from the Samuel Beckett novel, The Unnameable, just in case you like trivia.

I love you all.