Hello there,
It's nice to hear that you are planning to see your friend through this. Your presence and support are going to make the experience far less excruciating even if all you can do is be there, not judging at all.
I have a massive amount of respect for anybody who is willing to assist with another person's detox - it's not any easy thing to watch. Seeing someone you love at their absolute lowest can be heartbreaking, and in a lot of cases people can be unpleasant (sometimes down right cruel) when they're in pain (I'm confident you're prepared for this and will be quite patient and understanding). Remind him that as low as he may feel, this is a high moment in his life - a turn-around point, and remind him that as weak as he may feel, a firm decision to quit heroin is an inspiring display of strength. As much as I may have resented hearing how proud people are of me (it's hard to hear praise when you're hating yourself), some of it always soaks in.
I would suggest sitting down with him prior to the endeavor and working out an hour-by-hour schedule for the first week. Let him sleep/rest for as long as possible (at a point this will no longer be an option), and then attempt to encourage him to adhere to that schedule as closely as possible. Obviously, his physical state will dictate how much of your schedule he'll be capable of completing, but if he forces himself to do as much as of it as he can, time will pass more readily and he'll probably feel better for it (not to mention derive a sense of accomplishment from completing menial tasks). Doing this stuff with him (excluding the hot baths, perhaps - but who knows, right?) will probably keep you from going insane as well. If you just sit on the edge of the bed while he writhes around, you'll both just be counting the seconds... tick... tick... tick.
Be as sympathetic as possible, but try and be firm enough to encourage an active recovery. You obviously don't want him to shut you out or resent your being there, but I think if you establish some ground rules prior to the detox you'll know your boundaries and what he wants you to try and enforce.
Basically, this is for him and any way he wants to do it is how you should do it, but I would present him with these suggestions - they may really help. Just having somebody who cares nearby is going to be a massive comfort, and having somebody to be accountable to may reverse potential triggers for relapse. You're doing an amazing thing, and he's not going to want to put you through it again, so he might just stay clean.
Some stuff you may already know: You may want some over the counter medications, but you'll have to figure out how cold he likes his turkey and go from there. I would suggest some Dayquil/Nyquil and some Valerian at very least and possibly some loperamide or Imodium (the lope comes with its own set of problems - it is an opioid - and some people choose to avoid it when going cold turkey). Anyhow, there is a laundry list of OTC supplements you can buy to help with a cold turkey detox which I'm sure you can find on BL (or, if you'd like, I can list for you my personal arsenal).
I found this sample schedule on howtoquitheroin.com and modified it slightly. I actually really like this schedule, though you'll obviously want to tweak it. He'll obviously feel like death, but if he can start doing the walking early on it will make a world of difference. I personally had panic attacks trying to take long walks by myself while I was sick, but if you join him it may make it easier. Anyhow, this may give you some ideas regarding how to segment the day during the detox/early recovery period, and you can subtract and add to your heart's content, but i think there is some good stuff on here (my favorite part is "sit in a hot bath and think about 'Rocky'").
6:00am - Stay in bed till 7am. Focus on making it through today. |
7:00am - Get up, stretch, take Imodium (if this applies) and listen to some inspirational music. Pace the house. 10-15 minutes. |
7:15am - Eat a slice of bread w/peanut butter. Take vitamins. Drink a cup of water. |
7:30am - Get dressed, stretch. Then go out and take a long fast walk somewhere far. 1-2 hours. |
9:30am - Come home, vomit. Then watch TV for 30 minutes. |
10:00am - Take a shot of Nyquil (or DayQuil, or Benadryl) and 2 to 3 Valerian Root capsules. |
10:07am - Take a hot bath. Fill up the bath tub with hot hot water and stay there for 30 minutes. |
10:30am - Get dressed and get back into bed under the covers. 30 minutes. Think positive. |
11:00am - Get up, stretch and listen to some music. |
11:15am - Switch rooms, lie down and watch TV, browse the internet, or choose another activity. |
12:00pm - Eat a slice of bread with peanut butter and drink a cup of water and/or Gatorade. |
12:15pm - Get up, dress warm, take Imodium (optional) and go out for an afternoon walk to the park. 1-2 hours. |
2:00pm - Come home, chill and watch more good TV or sitcoms. 30 minutes. |
2:30pm - Take a shot of Nyquil (or DayQuil, or Benadryl) and 2 to 3 Valerian Root capsules. |
2:45pm - Fill up the tub with hot hot water, bring in TV and stay there. 30-45 minutes. |
3:30pm - Get dressed and get back into bed with a movie on in the background. 30-45 minutes. |
4:15pm - Get up, stretch and listen to some music while pacing the house. 10-15 minutes. |
4:30pm - Switch rooms to living room. Lie down and watch a little TV or another activity. |
5:00pm - Get up, dress warm, take Imodium and go out for a long evening walk for 1 mile. 1-2 hours. |
7:00pm - Come home, chill and watch more good TV, a movie or another activity. |
7:30pm - Eat a slice of bread with peanut butter and drink some water and/or Gatorade. |
7:45pm - Pace the house while listening to some music for 10-15 minutes. |
8:00pm - Take a shot of Nyquil and 2 to 3 Valerian Root capsules. |
8:05pm - Take a hot bath. Fill up the bath tub with hot hot water and stay there for 30 minutes. |
8:30pm - Get dressed and get back into bed with the TV on in the background. 30-60 minutes |
9:30pm - Get up, stretch, to some music and listen d pace the house. Reflect. |
9:45pm - Switch rooms to living room, lie down and watch TV or choose another activity. |
10:15pm - Take a hot bath. Fill up the bath tub with hot hot water and stay there for 30-45 minutes. |
11:00pm - Dress warm. Get in bed. Watch an inspirational movie like Rocky. |
1:00am - Take a shot of Nyquil and 2 to 3 Valerian Root capsules (or another sleep aid). |
1:10am - Take a hot bath. Fill up the bath tub with hot hot water and stay there think about Rocky. |
1:30am - Get up, get dressed and switch rooms to the living room. Relax, and watch TV. |
2:00am - Get up, stretch, drink some water, eat some bread and pace the house for 15 minutes. |
2:15am - Get back in the bed, under the covers. Watch an inspirational movie: (Seabiscut?). |
4:00am - Take a hot bath. Fill up the bath tub with hot hot water and stay there for 30 minutes. |
4:30am - Get up, get dressed and switch rooms to living room. Relax for 60 minutes. |
5:30am - Get back in bed and under the covers. |
Anyhow, no matter how you end up deciding to tackle this, you're doing a wonderful thing. So many of us wish that we had a friend like you to see us through this type of mess. Just remember, whatever happens, don't get down on yourself or get discouraged. Figure out beforehand how much pressure he wants you to lay on him and lay it on. If the train gets derailed, no big deal, hop back on... beyond that, be understanding and forgiving, and, most importantly, just 'be there, not judging at all'. Bless you and good luck.
PS: If you throw him a bone and offer him a massage, he will love you forever.