Detox Heroin detox at home cold turkey

[HatingThisLife]

So I posted before in TDS and tried to go cold turkey twice in the last month and a half but it was just unbearable and I caved. I took a lot of the recommendations given to me on the other post I made. I have 22 klonopin which I will use sparingly, fully aware of how bad benzo detox is bc I cold turkeyed off very large daily doses of xanax 8 years ago with nothing but vitamins in a semi truck driving across the country. The person I was with kept me same and had EMT training and monitored my seizures carefully. It was hell and I hallucinated crazy stuff for 2 weeks straight. I dont really like pins the way I loved xanax and will be very careful. Any leftovers will be put away for a rainy day. Anyhow, I have 22 pins, 8 .3mg clonidine (plan to break them in 3rds and take 1/3 3xs a day for the first 4 days, so 1 a day then a 1/2 a day for 2 days and then 1/4 a day for 2 days). I have 5 750mg methocarbomal for muscle aches/spasms and will take as or if needed. I also have a good amount of cannibas. I was a daily cannibas user but quit over a year ago bc for some reason smoking weed on heroin was giving me anxiety and making my blood pressure go thru the roof. While previously trying to cold turkey it did help me sleep.

Please tell me your thoughts on my plan and also how to fight the cravings. I am done I hate living this way I want to be clean I was clean for 3 years before this relapse but have been in active addiction for the last 3 years, I want that life back, I have a great job and 2 beautiful amazing kids who deserve better and i want to give it to them!! When I got clean before I loved being sober but ocassionally got serious cravings but at that time I had moved 3 hours away from where i was from/ 6 possibly 7 hours to get something. Moving away isnt an option this time so how to I fight the cravings! Wish me luck Im excited to start fresh and zi know Im gonna make it this tine!

 

[Chem-man]

Heroin wasn’t my drug of choice, but since I was taking a pile of pills every day maybe I can give some helpful advice.
When I was trying to cold turkey I had klonopins also and would take them to help with the brutal anxiety and sleeplessness, but I don’t need to tell you about the benzo problem since you already experienced it.
What did help me was a script of Zoloft for the anxiety and a script of trazadone to help with the sleeping. I didn’t successfully cold turkey any time I tried, but that was me and not you- and maybe I just wasn’t serious enough about it.
The second paragraph of your post is incredibly similar to where I found myself in November 2020. I loved the freedom of being sober but didn’t have the discipline to pull off cold turkey.
But you can. Others have and you can to! I’m sure others with similar experiences will post as well. Prayers for you my friend, I know you can do it. I am still in recovery and on suboxone (another post) but where I am now is way better than where I was.
you can do this!

 

[Jabberwocky]

you can't really fight cravings per se. you can be mindful of them, observe that they are thoughts rather than an integral part of yourself, and that they are impermanent. i've had cravings last for like 3-4 days but got through them cos i was desperate not to put my recovery at risk.

overall, its not really about willpower. because willpower always breaks due to a phenomenon known as ego fatigue. the way to fight cravings is to reframe what using is for you. there is a reason you want to stop. if it was going great for you and you were having fun then you wouldn't be trying to quit. when you think about using and how nice it would be, you need to counter it with the not so nice reality. it requires a genuine mental shift in your attitude to drugs, and tbh i don't know how you get that. i got it in rehab when i laughed genuinely for the first time in years after being bitter for weeks about feeling so utterly joyless. its possible you can condition or reason yourself into such a reframing and certainly worth a shot.

you also really need to address why you are using. there is some psychological need that is being met by drugs, and finding out what that is and how to meet it in a non destructive way will help fight the root cause of your addiction problems.

 

[HatingThisLife]

you can't really fight cravings per se. you can be mindful of them, observe that they are thoughts rather than an integral part of yourself, and that they are impermanent. i've had cravings last for like 3-4 days but got through them cos i was desperate not to put my recovery at risk.

overall, its not really about willpower. because willpower always breaks due to a phenomenon known as ego fatigue. the way to fight cravings is to reframe what using is for you. there is a reason you want to stop. if it was going great for you and you were having fun then you wouldn't be trying to quit. when you think about using and how nice it would be, you need to counter it with the not so nice reality. it requires a genuine mental shift in your attitude to drugs, and tbh i don't know how you get that. i got it in rehab when i laughed genuinely for the first time in years after being bitter for weeks about feeling so utterly joyless. its possible you can condition or reason yourself into such a reframing and certainly worth a shot.

you also really need to address why you are using. there is some psychological need that is being met by drugs, and finding out what that is and how to meet it in a non destructive way will help fight the root cause of your addiction problems.

I relapsed after my 2nd child was born due to really bad unaddressed ppd and lack of help. I was in a very very dark place mentally and my cousin who I was super close with had relapsed unbeknownst to me. He asked me to take him by "this lady's house" when I was giving him a ride to work one day. I knew what time it was right away and said fuck it. I was so miserable at that point in my life. It started out slow, a roxy here and there every week or so, it took 1.5 years to snowball into daily roxy use. My cousin was my only connect. He turned to dope and said he couldnt get the roxys any more so 6 months into daily roxy use I turned to dope due to no connections and ready to get clean yet. Fast forward a year and here we are.

Ive addressed the reasons for my relapse and in a good place mentally and emotionally except for the drug use. Thats why Im ready to go thru it a d get clean.

I have the mental shift at how I look at drugs, I know why I want to stop. Right now everytime I have a craving I try to focus on my kids bc they are a huge part of why I want to get clean.

So I'm gonna really take your advice to heart, Im gonna start making some lists to focus on. And make that mental shift.

Thinking I should try some mindful meditation too.

Thank you so much for your comment!

 

[HatingThisLife]

Heroin wasn’t my drug of choice, but since I was taking a pile of pills every day maybe I can give some helpful advice.
When I was trying to cold turkey I had klonopins also and would take them to help with the brutal anxiety and sleeplessness, but I don’t need to tell you about the benzo problem since you already experienced it.
What did help me was a script of Zoloft for the anxiety and a script of trazadone to help with the sleeping. I didn’t successfully cold turkey any time I tried, but that was me and not you- and maybe I just wasn’t serious enough about it.
The second paragraph of your post is incredibly similar to where I found myself in November 2020. I loved the freedom of being sober but didn’t have the discipline to pull off cold turkey.
But you can. Others have and you can to! I’m sure others with similar experiences will post as well. Prayers for you my friend, I know you can do it. I am still in recovery and on suboxone (another post) but where I am now is way better than where I was.
you can do this

 

[HatingThisLife]

Thank you for your post.

Ive tried trazadone and it makes me wake up with these weird like flashes in my mind almost like an electric shock or something. Good luck to you too!

 

[Pillhead111]

You should be fine with the kpins and muscle relaxers. Just stay hydrated with tons of water and Gatorade, try and take walks and move your body every day even if you feel like complete shit atleast try to move around every day, that’s what helps me the most. I can’t take stuff like trazadone it gives me the worst restless legs and arms it makes withdrawal twice as bad. All the times I withdrew from heroin I never had any benzos or muscle relaxers to help. So I think you should be all set for a somewhat better withdrawal than straight cold turkey with no meds which I’ve done many times

 

[HatingThisLife]

You should be fine with the kpins and muscle relaxers. Just stay hydrated with tons of water and Gatorade, try and take walks and move your body every day even if you feel like complete shit atleast try to move around every day, that’s what helps me the most. I can’t take stuff like trazadone it gives me the worst restless legs and arms it makes withdrawal twice as bad. All the times I withdrew from heroin I never had any benzos or muscle relaxers to help. So I think you should be all set for a somewhat better withdrawal than straight cold turkey with no meds which I’ve done many times

I think so too but esp with the clonidine. The worst part for me is feeling like Im on fire, the raised blood pressure, shakiness and inability to sleep. The rest of the symptons I can deal with! I could not do it cold turkey with nothing I tried twice in the last month and a half and its just unbearable. Feeling good so far. Coffee is really helping with energy levels and w the pins it not making me shaky!!

 

[Jabberwocky]

I think so too but esp with the clonidine. The worst part for me is feeling like Im on fire, the raised blood pressure, shakiness and inability to sleep. The rest of the symptons I can deal with! I could not do it cold turkey with nothing I tried twice in the last month and a half and its just unbearable. Feeling good so far. Coffee is really helping with energy levels and w the pins it not making me shaky!!

you are so strong for going cold turkey holy shit i couldnt stand it if i tried i didnt see this thread so i posted one almost exactly the same, but i have tramadol and methadone which makes it way easier, i hope you're doing better now, the cravings rarely go away, we will just have to deal with them.

 

[HatingThisLife]

you are so strong for going cold turkey holy shit i couldnt stand it if i tried i didnt see this thread so i posted one almost exactly the same, but i have tramadol and methadone which makes it way easier, i hope you're doing better now, the cravings rarely go away, we will just have to deal with them.

I could do it but unfortunately its me and my husband and he is too mentally weak and gives in to the craving so i still have all the pins and clonidines

 

[Jabberwocky]

Crap hahahaha we were in the almost exact same situation then, if you check out my thread and see the replies....