Benzos Help Please! Coming off of a benzo lapse, need advice urgently

[Bill.S]

Hi everyone, I have used this forum for advice for years and now need it personally.

FYI, I'm 31 and have been an addict of one form or another since 11. The usual weed to e, ket, trips etc.

I became a full blown alcoholic at 21 (usual parents with abuse issues, problematic childhood etc)

I went into hospital at rock bottom in 2017 with acute pancreatic issues, luckily I just survived and stayed alcohol free for 18 months. I did however heavily cross addict with benzos and had a huge seizure when coming off of huge doses of valium that put me out of action for a month.

I eventually ended up back on the booze, my brother tragically died just as I lapsed so I went into a spiral that ended with readmission for my pancreas, I had numerous seizures while on librium in hospital. Luckily I survived and went straight into rehab February this year.
I completed my 6 month programme and tried to find my way, I was unaware I have ptsd and adhd until recently.

On the 8th of October I started self medicating with ket and valium. I knew where I was headed so contacted my rehab and am now in supported housing.

I have reduced my valium intake to 10mgs in 2.5mg doses as of today, I wasn't taking it every day but did binge up to 40mgs. I know this is not huge but with my history of seizures I am concerned. I have also had two days of light drinking in the last week which I actually detested thank god.

How would you suggest I go about my mini detox as I can't risk seizure. I have access to valium and an old script of librium plus promethazine and anything else otc in the UK.

Any help would be greatly appreciated, I am so lucky to be here I can't loose it all or have a life changing seizure after everything I've been through.

Thank you for anyone reading and ready to help

 

[Jabberwocky]

I just wanna wish strength to you. You have been through a lot. Keep going, and don't give up.

Someone should be around soon, to give you some advice. I don't want to do that because i don't have enough knowledge to properly do so.

 

[Bill.S]

Thank you for your time

 

[Bill.S]

Thanks so much, I'll try my luck with a doctor ASAP.
I'm in supported housing as of Monday this week and we will get random drug testing. I can say I had my last dose the day I came in but not sure how long they will believe me if it keeps coming up later on. Suppose my health is more important.

 

[Bill.S]

I would hold that 10mg dose for the next 8 weeks. Then try 2.5mg 3x daily for another 8 weeks. Then 2.5mg 2x daily. You see where I'm going with this. Take your time. You never want to try and rush through benzo withdrawals unless you are being closely monitored in a hospital. You should see a doctor and try getting Gabapentin or Pregabalin. The latter is a much more powerful anticonvulsant and you should be on it since you've had multiple seizures. It can also reduce the anxiety benzo WD is notorious for causing as well as allow you to taper off faster without experiencing convulsions.

Good luck and stay safe

Would it not be counterproductive to extend my using as I've only been back on them relatively recently?

 

[Bill.S]

Oh. I must have missed that part. In this case you may be able to taper off rapidly if using Pregabalin. Just tell a doc about your seizure history and you shouldn't have much trouble getting a script. So you're down to 10mg daily, what were you taking before other than the day you took 40mg?

Like 10 some days 20 others, I was heavy on the ket as I now realise it was stabilising my adhd. It acts as a stimulant on myself.
Its kinda hazy obviously but most days ide say 10 to 20mg since the 8th of October with some days off

 

[Bill.S]

Also the promethazine, will it be ok to take? I'm so worked up i won't sleep and then my mental state will deteriorate further

 

[Bill.S]

Sincerely, thank you for helping me

 

[Robi]

youre fantastic Benzo, and welcome Bill, heartfelt wishes in the struggle

 

[Bill.S]

Thank you very much, feeling a bit more positive today.
Going to off my first 2.5mg till later and see how I go.
Any other seizure anti seizure advice would be much appreciated

 

[Robi]

hear stuff about cbd oil, but dont know much, think would def take some time, maybe look that up, my dogs seizing, and well i think im seeing a change tho she is on pheno, but as far as humans, some reports on kids doing better, being positive is everything for me, im so glad you are, im struggling with taking SSRI`s but honestly, having some connections and laughs here has made my out look better, tho im pretty empathic at times and my heart hurts for so many in pain WE ARE HERE FOR YOU!

 

[Bill.S]

hear stuff about cbd oil, but dont know much, think would def take some time, maybe look that up, my dogs seizing, and well i think im seeing a change tho she is on pheno, but as far as humans, some reports on kids doing better, being positive is everything for me, im so glad you are, im struggling with taking SSRI`s but honestly, having some connections and laughs here has made my out look better, tho im pretty empathic at times and my heart hurts for so many in pain WE ARE HERE FOR YOU!

Beautiful response, thank you.
Get sick of people saying 'just give up' ye if it was that easy none of us would be self medicating, I tried that angle uncountable times

 

[Robi]

EFFEXOR? that a snri aye, dont know name of medicine is that the risperidone?, heard that maybe snri`s a bit easier than the ssri*celexa i just started actually is making me feel anxious right away(3days on it) learning L then(SP) and magnesium are awesome but i eat so well, nuts nanas , avacado, tho no appetite on this crap im on, but curious of your anti depressant, so hopeful......oh wow cool data base and scale, ty ibtisam...dont be skert ,jk

 

[n3ophy7e]

Yep Effexor (venlafaxine) is an SNRI, and so is Cymbalta (duloxetine) which is the antidepressant I have been on for nearly a decade. It legitimately saved my life and has helped with my anxiety and PTSD immensely.
So I agree with @ibtisam midlet on that. In my opinion benzos should be reserved for acute/emergency anxiety situations such as panic attacks. SNRIs are more appropriate for a long term solution to anxiety.

 

[Bill.S]

Thanks for all your feedback.
I understand I need more long term solutions that I've only filled with short term fixes.
I'm on 5mg so far today feel OK so gonna take 2.5 at 7pm as I took 2.5 at 11am then 3pm, won't go over 10 will try 7.5 as of tomorrow.
Need to have a frank conversation with my doctor on Monday.
Big love to you all, will keep updates as I move forward ❤

 

[n3ophy7e]

Thanks for all your feedback.
I understand I need more long term solutions that I've only filled with short term fixes.
I'm on 5mg so far today feel OK so gonna take 2.5 at 7pm as I took 2.5 at 11am then 3pm, won't go over 10 will try 7.5 as of tomorrow.
Need to have a frank conversation with my doctor on Monday.
Big love to you all, will keep updates as I move forward ❤

Great work dude. You can do this!!

 

[Bill.S]

Hey guys, feel a lot more relaxed today.
I sourced some medical grade ketamine which I am microdosing which is working wonders with my adhd and mental health.
I took 2.5mg valium x 4 over the course of yesterday, I feel really good but I realise the benzos are defo causing my mood swings.
I'm reluctant to have any as I feel so good but I still know the threat of withdrawal.
Any feedback on how I should move now would be much appreciated while I wait on my doctor.
Big love to the community ❤

 

[Bill.S]

So I'm down to 7.5 mgs daily, feel steady at this and am going to go down to 5mg tomorrow. Is this too large a leap and how long should i stay on 5mgs? Its been about two months of using now.

I'm seeing the mental health team tomorrow afternoon so I'm hoping they prescribe me pregablin for my mood and withdrawal. I don't want to look like I'm fishing for meds by mentioning pregablin however I do know from close friends I was in recovery with that it has worked for them so going to go down that route. The mental health assessment I had on the phone came to a possible adhd and bi polar conclusion.

Again thanks for the help, when I had seizures before it was coming off of very high benzo and/or alcohol abuse. I'm still frightened however so being as safe as possible

 

[cdin]

you need to stop doing the ket. it creates a dangerous glutamate rebound if seizure threshold is already an issue.

 

[Snafu in the Void]

So I'm down to 7.5 mgs daily, feel steady at this and am going to go down to 5mg tomorrow. Is this too large a leap and how long should i stay on 5mgs? Its been about two months of using now.

You'll be fine, it's not that big of a change.

I'm seeing the mental health team tomorrow afternoon so I'm hoping they prescribe me pregablin for my mood and withdrawal. I don't want to look like I'm fishing for meds by mentioning pregablin however I do know from close friends I was in recovery with that it has worked for them so going to go down that route. The mental health assessment I had on the phone came to a possible adhd and bi polar conclusion.

give it some time, you don't want to come off as drug seeking, wait until next appointment

you need to stop doing the ket. it creates a dangerous glutamate rebound if seizure threshold is already an issue.

I'm not sure how ket can impact alcohol/benzo withdrawal related glutamate rebound, never looked into it myself, but yeah I have to agree even if OP is microdosing ketamine it's better to just not use it until clear of GABA withdrawal. It will probably only complicate matters.

I believe all the studies implicating ketamine treatment in alcohol use disorder were after the subjects were clear of acute dependence. I could be wrong.