sadasaulna
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Apr 18, 2017
- Messages
- 38
TLDR: Long term SSRI use is hell to get off. I have had success cutting my dose using Lithium Orotate and occasional Fabomotizole for anxiety. 5-HTP had limited success and I wouldn't really recommend it.
Main Post
I drank every day for 15 years and have been on SSRI for anxiety and depression around 8 years. Since giving up alcohol the last 2 years have been hellish. I thought stopping drinking would solve most of my problems, and while it has improved my life immeasurably in some areas, in terms of Anxiety and Depression it has almost killed me.
The thing is, while SSRIs work, I have come to hate how dependent I am on them, and how they actually create and magnify symptoms when trying to kick them.
In the early years of SSRI use I could take them or leave them and often did, being rather bad at keeping up a steady schedule I would take them for 3 months, be off them a few months, back on. I would get the "electric shocks" sensation coming off them but this never bothered me and I don't class it as a withdrawal. After the years went on I noticed a trend toward mania when I came off them too. My main SSRI for many years was Citalopram 20mg. I was taken off it and moved to sertraline after Citalopram started giving up on me a bit. That was a mistake.
All SSRIs have a difficult hump you have to get over, Sertraline was no different and the first couple of months on it were awful. I went from 50mg (not enough) to 100mg, and finally settled down on that. But felt like a zombie and had no pleasure in life. I was existing and not trying to kill myself was about the best thing you could say.
So a few times I tried to get off Sertraline cold turkey like I had Citalopram. Big mistake. Each time I tried within 3 days I was a basket case - panic attacks, crying, crazy levels of anxiety and paranoia, and rapid cycle mania.
The next time I tried to come off it with 5-HTP. The 5-HTP cushioned the blow and I had no panic attacks but the mania was as bad as ever. After a few days I cracked again and was back on.
Then I tried dropping dose to 50mg, with no other drugs (didn't want to risk taking 5-HTP and Sert together) Not as harsh but within 1 week I was back up to 100mg, unable to cope.
So I'm sharing my first success with dropping the dose without going crazy - Lithium Orotate - I dropped to 50mg as before while taking a daily dose of 5mg elemental lithium in orotate form. That seems to have stopped the mania completely. First couple of weeks anxiety would get quite bad so I would take a 10mg Fabomotizole when it was too much to bear and that always helped.
Now on week 4 of 50mg and I seem to have my life back, feeling like a human being again. I don't miss the higher dose at all now, and the anxiety has nearly all gone away.
My plan is to get down to 25mg next, and maybe zero eventually. I will then try dosing down the lithium and hopefully won't have to take it long term.
Quick summary of drugs I have self medicated (not abused) and notes (with the caveat that we're all different in the way we respond):
Escitalopram - best SSRI I ever tried, if not having a soul is your goal. Zero anxiety or depression but then I didn't care about anything. Serial killers choice 10/10.
Citalopram - nicest ride of the SSRIs I tried, quite gentle on the withdrawal
Sertraline - horrid getting on, horrid getting off, not even that great at the job it does. For instance you will still have anxiety, you just won't care you have anxiety.
5-HTP - high apathy, not that amazing for dropping anxiety, bad for you in the long run, I'd give it a miss.
Valerian - a weird one for me, usually does nothing other than very mild sedation, but sometimes if taken at night I wake up the next day feeling amazing
Gotu Kola - might have been an improvement / might not, barely able to tell it apart from Placebo
Magnesium Chelate - best taken at night, makes you lethargic, worth taking as a background thing but I don't use much now
Licorice Root - this makes a delicious and very anxiolytic tea, recommended but not for every day, too much licorice is bad for you.
Phenibut - showed me there was a light at the end of the tunnel, and while it is certainly not sustainable I am very thankful to it for it opening to the door
to let the light in. I now use it very infrequently and only at low dose.
Fabomotizole - Weird at first then when I adjusted it is great. I now use only for acute anxiety and find I am using it less and less.
Main Post
I drank every day for 15 years and have been on SSRI for anxiety and depression around 8 years. Since giving up alcohol the last 2 years have been hellish. I thought stopping drinking would solve most of my problems, and while it has improved my life immeasurably in some areas, in terms of Anxiety and Depression it has almost killed me.
The thing is, while SSRIs work, I have come to hate how dependent I am on them, and how they actually create and magnify symptoms when trying to kick them.
In the early years of SSRI use I could take them or leave them and often did, being rather bad at keeping up a steady schedule I would take them for 3 months, be off them a few months, back on. I would get the "electric shocks" sensation coming off them but this never bothered me and I don't class it as a withdrawal. After the years went on I noticed a trend toward mania when I came off them too. My main SSRI for many years was Citalopram 20mg. I was taken off it and moved to sertraline after Citalopram started giving up on me a bit. That was a mistake.
All SSRIs have a difficult hump you have to get over, Sertraline was no different and the first couple of months on it were awful. I went from 50mg (not enough) to 100mg, and finally settled down on that. But felt like a zombie and had no pleasure in life. I was existing and not trying to kill myself was about the best thing you could say.
So a few times I tried to get off Sertraline cold turkey like I had Citalopram. Big mistake. Each time I tried within 3 days I was a basket case - panic attacks, crying, crazy levels of anxiety and paranoia, and rapid cycle mania.
The next time I tried to come off it with 5-HTP. The 5-HTP cushioned the blow and I had no panic attacks but the mania was as bad as ever. After a few days I cracked again and was back on.
Then I tried dropping dose to 50mg, with no other drugs (didn't want to risk taking 5-HTP and Sert together) Not as harsh but within 1 week I was back up to 100mg, unable to cope.
So I'm sharing my first success with dropping the dose without going crazy - Lithium Orotate - I dropped to 50mg as before while taking a daily dose of 5mg elemental lithium in orotate form. That seems to have stopped the mania completely. First couple of weeks anxiety would get quite bad so I would take a 10mg Fabomotizole when it was too much to bear and that always helped.
Now on week 4 of 50mg and I seem to have my life back, feeling like a human being again. I don't miss the higher dose at all now, and the anxiety has nearly all gone away.
My plan is to get down to 25mg next, and maybe zero eventually. I will then try dosing down the lithium and hopefully won't have to take it long term.
Quick summary of drugs I have self medicated (not abused) and notes (with the caveat that we're all different in the way we respond):
Escitalopram - best SSRI I ever tried, if not having a soul is your goal. Zero anxiety or depression but then I didn't care about anything. Serial killers choice 10/10.
Citalopram - nicest ride of the SSRIs I tried, quite gentle on the withdrawal
Sertraline - horrid getting on, horrid getting off, not even that great at the job it does. For instance you will still have anxiety, you just won't care you have anxiety.
5-HTP - high apathy, not that amazing for dropping anxiety, bad for you in the long run, I'd give it a miss.
Valerian - a weird one for me, usually does nothing other than very mild sedation, but sometimes if taken at night I wake up the next day feeling amazing
Gotu Kola - might have been an improvement / might not, barely able to tell it apart from Placebo
Magnesium Chelate - best taken at night, makes you lethargic, worth taking as a background thing but I don't use much now
Licorice Root - this makes a delicious and very anxiolytic tea, recommended but not for every day, too much licorice is bad for you.
Phenibut - showed me there was a light at the end of the tunnel, and while it is certainly not sustainable I am very thankful to it for it opening to the door
to let the light in. I now use it very infrequently and only at low dose.
Fabomotizole - Weird at first then when I adjusted it is great. I now use only for acute anxiety and find I am using it less and less.