Gator H Dizzle510/415/602
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Dec 6, 2021
- Messages
- 10
Hello, I would like to Introduce myself, I am new, but have been a lurker here harder or as hard as anyone has ever lorked for the last twenty plus years...finally decided to join in 
. I don't do well on reddit, allot of hate and ridicule there, not so nice people. I have belonged to a site called "pharmacy reviewer" for YEARS, but it was only to get help with finding online pharmacies and also earlier in my life real life doctors whereas there was a service I found through them that took my medical file including an MRI of my back (the "golden ticket" at the time) and sent it all to a "compassionate" doctor and set up the apoitment for me, with a pre understood unspoken gurantee you would leave on your first apoitment with an Rx for 90 or 120 norcos, 90 xanax/ diazepam, depending on the doctor whichever works best for you or you ask for..
Anyway Im 35 now, and have been through and seen it all at this point I feel like. My main focus now is practice spiritualy and mentally to live my life to its fullest without stress, anger or any negative emotions. I do property management, which can be boring work, but have learned to take everything each moment and live it to its fullest potential, clearing my mind of the past, or worries about the future, and just accomplishing the tax at hand, and THOROUGHLY enjoying my deserved peace and relaxation when I am done, and even doing simple tasks such as Laundry which I actually love to do! I am a guy but got really good at it when I invested ALLOT of money in nice cloths, lost allot of weight, started taking better care of myself and pride myself in being able to get out ANY stain, keep my cloths like new, good brands, no Gucci or Loui, not even burbery, but have a wonderful collection of Polo Ralph Lauren, Lacoste, and a ceople pieces by Hugo Boss, maybe one good True Religion outfit with amazing matching/ perfect hat for the outfit. I enjoy simple things and take notice of the feeling of water on my skin in the shower, I clear my mind and live in that moment, I have learned with the help of the teachings of Eckhart Tolle that you only have the oresent moment to live, if you have a "noisy" mind, and or always thinking and living int he future or the past, you never actually are living, you need work on silencing the mind and essentually "taking time to smell the roses", yall get the gist im sure...
My Hobbies are, well I do not do much shopping anymore, kinda went over my limit already last year and this year combined to what I have achieved now, just a caretaker of it. If I have any spare money i like to save it for something big, like a whatch, have worked myself up to a Rolex I always wanted to own, nthing "flashy" its a year 2000 Explorer II, a "spelunkers" whatch..(Cave Explorer). It is in rembrence of my youth and the two years specifically I spent in Brazil durring some of my most transformative years, 12, 13 and saw 14...It was an amazing experience, my dad worked and continues to work for a bank, and he had a opportunity to take a job down there to help further his career, and make more money of course, you don't up and move to brazil withoit some reason or incentive, thats what it was at the time...There were MANY MANY cave systems in Brazil, and guides would take you for next to nothing and rent you out the gear needed to explore the cave systems, sometimes having to dive underwater and swim for some distance to a flashlight they would put down for you to swim toward to pop up on the other end and catch your breath, it was the kind of stuff we even did at school a couple of times for field trips, that would NEVER fly in the united states...way too many risks...kids are bubble wrapped now adays if not being injected with experimental drugs that their strong as a rock immune systems simply do not need (sorry, not looking to get political here, please just go look at the science and you will see what I mean by that, kids are not at risk from any current virus just look at the numbers they are the lowest risk group and have essentially a slim to no risk of dying of covid, I meen nothing more nothing less"...
I used to Golf, before the Covid weirdness struck, I live in Oaland, California, 10 minutes drive from the city..in the foothills, great location, quiet, peaceful, no I don't hear gunshots going off every night. I am a victim of the so called "war on Pain Patients." I was left in the cold is one way to put it when my long time pain management doctor, and great spiritual friend, Dr. Baldwin, passed away. I believe it was his decision, his wife had been going crazy and acting angry toward him, as if he were a burden. He lost his leg due to some complications and medical malpractice, and was involved in a lawsuit. Had a prosthetic, but was never able to pull it off to get himself walking again well, so he needed help, and I think the fighting with the qute Asian wife, he was an older black man who overcame many things in his life, fought for us and was one of the Tuskeegee airman, went into medicine and passed with awards and certificates, etc. all that stuff. anyway, once he was gone, finding another "him" was impossible of course, nothing close, still looking and have just been randomply had my communication stopped/ cut off by my last doctor who was Rx'ing me Morphine for my pain, the smallest amount the new "reccomendations" allow, really bad situation, I decided I wouldn't lie down like a dog though, and do whatever I needed to do to stay out of pain 24/7. I have a really bad back too much to list here, was in an accident and I shattered both my ankles (were reconstructed) and fractured my lower spine. I have a disease called Osteo Necrosis...the "death of the bone" disease due to lack of bloodflow, in my case, it is in my hips, had my first replacement at 26 or so? due to the disease (really early). My right one is at 25-30% function as of my last MRI time I checked it, which was 8 years ago by MRI, so I don't knwo for sure now, both hurt, but my right one is still my dominant and stronger one so I am hesitant to get it replaced until absolutely neccesary.
Alot of things going on in the world today, far to many to list, and so many so close to home, that are so very deeply upsetting to me, if I allowed myself to dwell on them. I am thankful for what I have, my ability to have peace of mind and live in the moment, as if the moment is infident and everything is so so beutiful, my little dogs, my cozy room, my nice new mattress, my puffy jacket (its winter now and cold here..finally..) but still some war, sunny days, its Bay Area whether you have to experience it to understand it, (lived here my whole life with stints in phoneix (birth place/ where my extened family lives and have "my condo" at), Brazil, and Chicago Illinois when I was really little, all moves related to my fathers Job. However, the bay area has been my home the longest. I grow cannibus, I am pretty good at it, got it down to a T by now pretty much, know everything there is to know nearly...or NEED to know to grow some good healthy plants and keep them that way until harvest. Use the new "LED" technology big time savings on Energy and amazing results with just WOW output on light...invested in a 1,000 professional light I gotr it for a little over $400 as it was from a new start up company at the time still on the market making amazing lights with the same spec as the 1,000 dollar ones for half...very high quality, samsung made "diodes" I gues is what they are called now, LED's/ Diodes, these technical things I am no expert on, just the stuff needed to have a happy thriving environment to grow any MJ you want and how to do it and tips and such...
Would love it if I could use MJ for pain, but it doesnt work...I find its GREAT for the times that pop up where I feel tension rising in me and can't get it down (freak outs, panic attacks) if I take just one lil hit off a blunt it screws my head right back on straight, two hits off the blunt and im HIGH and HIGH for me makes me notice everything more vividly, im a better driver believe it or not off one hit, feel like im in complete control and enhances whatever else I am taking, notice EVERYTHING on the road see things before they happen etc. mind works overtime/ overclocked. Two puffs and im high HIGH and I notice everything like all my aches in my body, my areas where I had surgery, metal, little pains, weird/ off feeling areas of my body, stuff my mind learned to put out to cope normally...so it does the opposite for me for my physical pain...totally wish that were not the case, wish nothing more than I could be a BOSSMAN like lil boosie and smoking on a fat blunt everytime you see me, but that was when I was a kid I was like that it doesntwork anymore, and I cant stand noticing all the things wrong with me, it opens up that door now with all my physical pain so it just got me stuck in a bad siituation, just a little bit and that doesnt happen and really enjoy it, one puff extra and im like "WHY" and have a bad time. SO rely on OPIOIDS pain medicaltion, anything I can get my hands on thats an opioid and does not have any anolgues in it (have tester strips, going to order more advanced tester for the shit as well as have seen perfect looking/ beutiful stuff test positive and worried about false positives...
Anyway, thats a little of my life story and my introduction, I am new so anyone who lives around me, or just a friendly people, if you have time, shoot me a message, would really appreciate if you contact me or add me as a friend or I will add you. Have a wonderful day and thankyou if you even took the time to skim this far.
sincerely yall friend- Holden/ "Gator"
. I don't do well on reddit, allot of hate and ridicule there, not so nice people. I have belonged to a site called "pharmacy reviewer" for YEARS, but it was only to get help with finding online pharmacies and also earlier in my life real life doctors whereas there was a service I found through them that took my medical file including an MRI of my back (the "golden ticket" at the time) and sent it all to a "compassionate" doctor and set up the apoitment for me, with a pre understood unspoken gurantee you would leave on your first apoitment with an Rx for 90 or 120 norcos, 90 xanax/ diazepam, depending on the doctor whichever works best for you or you ask for..Anyway Im 35 now, and have been through and seen it all at this point I feel like. My main focus now is practice spiritualy and mentally to live my life to its fullest without stress, anger or any negative emotions. I do property management, which can be boring work, but have learned to take everything each moment and live it to its fullest potential, clearing my mind of the past, or worries about the future, and just accomplishing the tax at hand, and THOROUGHLY enjoying my deserved peace and relaxation when I am done, and even doing simple tasks such as Laundry which I actually love to do! I am a guy but got really good at it when I invested ALLOT of money in nice cloths, lost allot of weight, started taking better care of myself and pride myself in being able to get out ANY stain, keep my cloths like new, good brands, no Gucci or Loui, not even burbery, but have a wonderful collection of Polo Ralph Lauren, Lacoste, and a ceople pieces by Hugo Boss, maybe one good True Religion outfit with amazing matching/ perfect hat for the outfit. I enjoy simple things and take notice of the feeling of water on my skin in the shower, I clear my mind and live in that moment, I have learned with the help of the teachings of Eckhart Tolle that you only have the oresent moment to live, if you have a "noisy" mind, and or always thinking and living int he future or the past, you never actually are living, you need work on silencing the mind and essentually "taking time to smell the roses", yall get the gist im sure...
My Hobbies are, well I do not do much shopping anymore, kinda went over my limit already last year and this year combined to what I have achieved now, just a caretaker of it. If I have any spare money i like to save it for something big, like a whatch, have worked myself up to a Rolex I always wanted to own, nthing "flashy" its a year 2000 Explorer II, a "spelunkers" whatch..(Cave Explorer). It is in rembrence of my youth and the two years specifically I spent in Brazil durring some of my most transformative years, 12, 13 and saw 14...It was an amazing experience, my dad worked and continues to work for a bank, and he had a opportunity to take a job down there to help further his career, and make more money of course, you don't up and move to brazil withoit some reason or incentive, thats what it was at the time...There were MANY MANY cave systems in Brazil, and guides would take you for next to nothing and rent you out the gear needed to explore the cave systems, sometimes having to dive underwater and swim for some distance to a flashlight they would put down for you to swim toward to pop up on the other end and catch your breath, it was the kind of stuff we even did at school a couple of times for field trips, that would NEVER fly in the united states...way too many risks...kids are bubble wrapped now adays if not being injected with experimental drugs that their strong as a rock immune systems simply do not need (sorry, not looking to get political here, please just go look at the science and you will see what I mean by that, kids are not at risk from any current virus just look at the numbers they are the lowest risk group and have essentially a slim to no risk of dying of covid, I meen nothing more nothing less"...
I used to Golf, before the Covid weirdness struck, I live in Oaland, California, 10 minutes drive from the city..in the foothills, great location, quiet, peaceful, no I don't hear gunshots going off every night
. I am a victim of the so called "war on Pain Patients." I was left in the cold is one way to put it when my long time pain management doctor, and great spiritual friend, Dr. Baldwin, passed away. I believe it was his decision, his wife had been going crazy and acting angry toward him, as if he were a burden. He lost his leg due to some complications and medical malpractice, and was involved in a lawsuit. Had a prosthetic, but was never able to pull it off to get himself walking again well, so he needed help, and I think the fighting with the qute Asian wife, he was an older black man who overcame many things in his life, fought for us and was one of the Tuskeegee airman, went into medicine and passed with awards and certificates, etc. all that stuff. anyway, once he was gone, finding another "him" was impossible of course, nothing close, still looking and have just been randomply had my communication stopped/ cut off by my last doctor who was Rx'ing me Morphine for my pain, the smallest amount the new "reccomendations" allow, really bad situation, I decided I wouldn't lie down like a dog though, and do whatever I needed to do to stay out of pain 24/7. I have a really bad back too much to list here, was in an accident and I shattered both my ankles (were reconstructed) and fractured my lower spine. I have a disease called Osteo Necrosis...the "death of the bone" disease due to lack of bloodflow, in my case, it is in my hips, had my first replacement at 26 or so? due to the disease (really early). My right one is at 25-30% function as of my last MRI time I checked it, which was 8 years ago by MRI, so I don't knwo for sure now, both hurt, but my right one is still my dominant and stronger one so I am hesitant to get it replaced until absolutely neccesary.Alot of things going on in the world today, far to many to list, and so many so close to home, that are so very deeply upsetting to me, if I allowed myself to dwell on them. I am thankful for what I have, my ability to have peace of mind and live in the moment, as if the moment is infident and everything is so so beutiful, my little dogs, my cozy room, my nice new mattress, my puffy jacket (its winter now and cold here..finally..) but still some war, sunny days, its Bay Area whether you have to experience it to understand it, (lived here my whole life with stints in phoneix (birth place/ where my extened family lives and have "my condo" at), Brazil, and Chicago Illinois when I was really little, all moves related to my fathers Job. However, the bay area has been my home the longest. I grow cannibus, I am pretty good at it, got it down to a T by now pretty much, know everything there is to know nearly...or NEED to know to grow some good healthy plants and keep them that way until harvest. Use the new "LED" technology big time savings on Energy and amazing results with just WOW output on light...invested in a 1,000 professional light I gotr it for a little over $400 as it was from a new start up company at the time still on the market making amazing lights with the same spec as the 1,000 dollar ones for half...very high quality, samsung made "diodes" I gues is what they are called now, LED's/ Diodes, these technical things I am no expert on, just the stuff needed to have a happy thriving environment to grow any MJ you want and how to do it and tips and such...
Would love it if I could use MJ for pain, but it doesnt work...I find its GREAT for the times that pop up where I feel tension rising in me and can't get it down (freak outs, panic attacks) if I take just one lil hit off a blunt it screws my head right back on straight, two hits off the blunt and im HIGH and HIGH for me makes me notice everything more vividly, im a better driver believe it or not off one hit, feel like im in complete control and enhances whatever else I am taking, notice EVERYTHING on the road see things before they happen etc. mind works overtime/ overclocked. Two puffs and im high HIGH and I notice everything like all my aches in my body, my areas where I had surgery, metal, little pains, weird/ off feeling areas of my body, stuff my mind learned to put out to cope normally...so it does the opposite for me for my physical pain...totally wish that were not the case, wish nothing more than I could be a BOSSMAN like lil boosie and smoking on a fat blunt everytime you see me, but that was when I was a kid I was like that it doesntwork anymore, and I cant stand noticing all the things wrong with me, it opens up that door now with all my physical pain so it just got me stuck in a bad siituation, just a little bit and that doesnt happen and really enjoy it, one puff extra and im like "WHY" and have a bad time. SO rely on OPIOIDS pain medicaltion, anything I can get my hands on thats an opioid and does not have any anolgues in it (have tester strips, going to order more advanced tester for the shit as well as have seen perfect looking/ beutiful stuff test positive and worried about false positives...
Anyway, thats a little of my life story and my introduction, I am new so anyone who lives around me, or just a friendly people, if you have time, shoot me a message, would really appreciate if you contact me or add me as a friend or I will add you. Have a wonderful day and thankyou if you even took the time to skim this far.
sincerely yall friend- Holden/ "Gator"
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