I hate AA, but I've got 22 years without a drink.
I had an astronomical tolerance for beer and vodka, and have had all sorts of bad stuff happened.
My higher power is DEATH.
I workout with weights, and study jazz theory, for guitar. It's ok, but when I first quit booze for good I looked forward to a...ahem, NAP after work. Yeah, that's right, very boring but I was dying so that was my big thrill.
I had quit 3 times before for a year or 2, whatever while I'd be on was on probation, and always thought that I could control it now that I had gotten older.
But when I'd start again slowly, it always went right back to big time If you love it, your going to relapse, (or I should say most addicts and boozers do) and your best bet is hope you hit bottom without creating too much damage to yourself or others.
My old lady was into my love of alchohol and she adamantly wanted to stop, so I got hitched to her, and beign with someone who won't relapse is pretty helpful.
I find that any kind of minor vice, like Monsters or Red Bulls, Coffee Shops, smoking helps, (smoke only if your young) anything associated with "sinful" behavior helps.
You'll lose your partying friends because they'll think your a drag, but you can't be around them.
Don't associate with anyone if that's what it takes. (That goes triple for those AA weirdos.)
Reading a lot of Tony O'Neil books, he's a recovered addict who hates AA and doctors, and actually thinks you can do the occasional line or a few beers, sort of like what you'd like. But he's a recoverd junky, that was his thing. Plus he had a kid and a good old lady who kept him in line. That's a pretty risky life, but it's refreshing to see someone say it published books. They're great stories too, he's an incredible writer.
Find another interest, if you can, if not read Dan Fante, Burroughs, Bukowski and other unrepentent dopers and drinkers. Let them be your sacrificial bad self.
