G
Gonegoinggone
Guest
I have no idea where to go. What I'm doing. I hate that I can't even hide any longer that i have no idea where to go or what to do. i hate that it seems everyone around me is moving forward and moving up and i can't seem to get out of the quick sand. i hate that they hold it against me. they don't remember when i held them up. when i was strong. who is the hero for the hero? and here i sit. fallen and shattered. i'm tired of crying. i'm tired of being awake. i'm tired of being paralyzed. it's all in my head but there's no stopping it. i was on top. now i remain here on the bottom. years of a spiral that never ended. never got better. the self pity swallowed me. the self loathing surfaced and my arms are heavy. i have no hope and have not feared death for a very long time. i don't ask it to come. wait for it, rather.