So... I came home from running errands and almost immediately she says shes going to take a shower (#2 for today) which wasnt CRAZY for her so i thought nothing of it. Later, a while after she gets out i go in to use the bathroom. I look over and lone behold I find the small corner of a condom rapper. Immediately I called her into the bathroom and held it up and said "What the f*ck it this" she immediately folded and said she was using it on a hairbrush handle to masturbate. I turned around and right there on top of the dresser was a hairbrush with a small, slim handle. She begged that i not make a big deal of it and assured me she only did it because she was on her period and in a "mood" and never thought id find out. Being the good boyfriend i am, i immediately dropped the conversation, went back to the livingroom and continued watching tv.
Here i am 1:30am unable to sleep. My brain knows something subconsciously that my conscious mind has not yet put together. for some reason i was thinking back to a trip to the grocery store a few days back, she was picking out some field cucumbers when i walked up behind her and said "you wish i was that big eh" laughingly in a joking manner. She says "No, not that big and stop making those stupid sexual comments in public" and she wasnt joking she was pissed. i said "fine, f*ck i wont joke around anymore". that was the end of that, life goes on.
so i find myself at 1:00am with my head in the fridge, open up the crisper and theres 2 BIG cucumbers... im talking 9"-10" long and 6"-7" around. I couldnt remember how many she grabbed that day. but i did know we hadnt used cucumber for anything since. So i look over and bam!, theres the receipt clear as day on the counter top. i quickly scan it and there it is... Field cucumber x3.
we only have 2 cucumbers and havnt eaten any. so this is when my heart drops, my face goes into the frozen disgusted (just seen a dead body) look.
im thinking, where the hell could she hide this stuff? so i grab her backpack that she takes to work, unzip and there she is... a bigass cucumber that smells like condom and a handful of condoms.
im mortified. dont know what to do, or think. I almost threw up (not a joke) and i cant wipe this horrified look off my face. Ive never thought of myself as "small" but this cucumber, i mean... it makes me feel like im packing a baby carrot.
weve been together for almost 3 years, ive always thought of her as the one, future wife, the whole 9-yards but after this discovery, dont know... do i keep going with a girl that wants a giant dick, and lies to save face. i still dont know if the "little haaibrush" handle lie was to save my ego or save her from looking like a whore.
my brain hurts... how do i handle this?
Here i am 1:30am unable to sleep. My brain knows something subconsciously that my conscious mind has not yet put together. for some reason i was thinking back to a trip to the grocery store a few days back, she was picking out some field cucumbers when i walked up behind her and said "you wish i was that big eh" laughingly in a joking manner. She says "No, not that big and stop making those stupid sexual comments in public" and she wasnt joking she was pissed. i said "fine, f*ck i wont joke around anymore". that was the end of that, life goes on.
so i find myself at 1:00am with my head in the fridge, open up the crisper and theres 2 BIG cucumbers... im talking 9"-10" long and 6"-7" around. I couldnt remember how many she grabbed that day. but i did know we hadnt used cucumber for anything since. So i look over and bam!, theres the receipt clear as day on the counter top. i quickly scan it and there it is... Field cucumber x3.
we only have 2 cucumbers and havnt eaten any. so this is when my heart drops, my face goes into the frozen disgusted (just seen a dead body) look.
im thinking, where the hell could she hide this stuff? so i grab her backpack that she takes to work, unzip and there she is... a bigass cucumber that smells like condom and a handful of condoms.
im mortified. dont know what to do, or think. I almost threw up (not a joke) and i cant wipe this horrified look off my face. Ive never thought of myself as "small" but this cucumber, i mean... it makes me feel like im packing a baby carrot.
weve been together for almost 3 years, ive always thought of her as the one, future wife, the whole 9-yards but after this discovery, dont know... do i keep going with a girl that wants a giant dick, and lies to save face. i still dont know if the "little haaibrush" handle lie was to save my ego or save her from looking like a whore.
my brain hurts... how do i handle this?
