False Inspiration: Results Still Just as Meaningful

[Metamphnethylamine]

My heart aches
Troubled by a numbness I can no longer hope to face
Chemical stimulation has become the structure of my foundation
Prescription payments rooted at the basis of my complacence
Some habits come around
But die hard as they leave
Others overwhelm
cloud what I try to see
I hover between bitter emptiness and daydreams so serene
But still I rationalize my every decision it seems
I'm lost like a family dog
wandered into a new place
My eager aptitude for life seems to have suddenly washed away
Fading footsteps in my memories
With no ability to scream "wait"
So the rain drops in my stormcloud help to wash away the name
The life that I once knew is anything but replaced
My life's a mess now judging from a bed that's never made
And everything I miss can never be the same
I can see her in my dreams though her image surely fades
Goodmorning
Yes!
I wake up to a pill or five
I think about success yet see a handful of failed tries
I made a kingdom from regrets
Seen standing tall atop my lies
Always protecting why I'm still so empty...I don't know who I am inside
But I do still sit here alone and wonder why
Why I'd still die for a chance to see her and taste heaven in her mind
Get lost inside her eyes
And find my home within her lies
And if that made any sense at all
I wouldn't be who she left behind
I lost myself in all my choices
Just to clear my head with a heavy sigh
What now?
I'm not sure how..
But I'm sure I can
I don't know a damned thing else
But I know that I sure can
I lost myself there
And had to struggle just to stand
But it's really just a chance to start over
And rebuild who I am
The nature of this life
When at a loss for what is right
Try again
Another day to live
Another chance to fight

 

[Erikmen]

^ Very good!

I like the part you try again.
Try again
Another day to live
Another chance to fight


Nicely put Metamphnethylamine! Hope I got you name right

 

[Metamphnethylamine]

I gave a bum my last dollar and a roach
I walked upstairs to unlock my door and spotted a butterfly on my window
As I drove my love away I no longer saw birds in sets of two
I always see just one now
That let's me know how far away she flew
Better to have loved and lost is far from truth
Each love takes its rightful piece
I wonder how many I broke off you
What do I do?
It's a question I ask myself too often
It's the looking around and wondering how many days I've really been lost in
How much worse can it really get?
Probably a lot worse
You just can't see past what you haven't seen yet
It's really hard to find self-worth when the people you love hurts
So just remember even the most beautiful of flowers
Has to pick up it's pretty petals and lift itself off the dirt
Anger is secondary to pain and sadness
Letting go is one thing
But coming so far just to start anew
That's madness
I try to look up and find a way
I never trust a hope
But don't aim to give up on today
I find what little bit of strength I have because I have to
Because now I spend most times alone
Because I'm lost in one too many ways
But sometimes all you need is another broken heart
like your own
Just to finally feel ok
Maybe I really am alone here
Maybe some things can never change
But even then
I'll just turn around
And walk back this same path the way I came
The saddest phrase you can ever really say is "I'm used to it"
I dropped every expectation I could have
so disappointment is no longer what I have to go through with
I knew our surfactant drug-fueled story would end so very badly but much too soon
Volatile as our nature our essence dissipates in vapors
Doomed
I lost myself in the process
Personality evaporated and the other phase changes
Sublimated and diffused
I gave up on everything as you left our room
Now I have nothing
Not even myself to turn back to
I guess all I'm saying is you never really know what you get yourself into
Until regret and hindsight's clarity becomes the tune you sing your every your song to
Sometimes it's the truth long sought after
Forever burning in our minds
Once known impossible to deny
For all I loved was the beautiful, heavenly way she lied
Forever lost in her eyes
Forever is nothing but a nonexistent
Useless
Painful measurement of time