I already been through an extreme high dose benzo withdrawal. Cold turkeyed from 20 mg of Xanax, and it was psychotic terror anxiety, delirious hell on earth. But I would dare to say that high dose pregabalin withdrawal is almost as bad. Here is my story I posted on Lyrica survivors facebook page (a support group for people withdrawing from Lyrica / pregabalin)
"Hi guys. I come here to tell you my pregabalin abuse story.
I was heavily addicted to pregabalin for around 7 months. I started using the Pfizer capsules. I started with a dose of 600mg a day. I immediately fell in love with the calm buzz and deep sleep it gave me. I suffer from anxiety and insomnia so this drug was helping me greatly.
Soon I needed more and more because I have a pretty big body and build up tolerance to any drug very quickly. Buying the capsules became a bit expansive, so I ordered a 1 kilo bag from a Chinese laboratory that just sent it at my doorstep in The Netherlands. My dosages soon reached 3000mg per day. On the last days of my use i was taking up to 10 grams. I know it sounds insane. I ordered another 1 kilo bag from China because I almost finished the whole 1 kilo bag after a couple of months of use. But the 1kg bag was seized by customs so I ran out of pregabalin. I did not have any money to buy the capsules, so I was forced to quit cold turkey last year. I thought I would get away with it. But I was wrong..... really wrong.
For a week without pregabalin I felt kind of strange, but nothing too serious. The only real negative so far was the fact I was not able to sleep at all for that whole week. At one day things started to get dark. I got an extreme feeling of impending doom and a massive panic attack. My heart was pounding so fast, I thought I was about to die. Derealization and massive anxiety kicked in and I was unable to move or talk to people. I started getting extremely scared and confused and I wanted to kill myself by jumping out of the window. Luckily my dad was watching over me and stopped me, or else I would have been dead right now.
My dad called 911 and they took me to the hospital where they gave me 2,5 lorazepam to calm me a bit down. I was feeling more calm but became delirious and started feeling an evil doomed depressed feeling that left me feeling severely suicidal again. They took to me a detox center where they gave me 7,5 mg lorazepam and a 2mg dose Haldol for psychosis. I was somewhat stable but was SEVERELY depressed. I never been so depressed in my whole life. I could barely move. I was also not able to sleep at all. Even with the high dose of lorazepam. And even if I slept, I had the worst dark hellish nightmares you could ever imaging. Every time I woke up in a confused state thinking I had a demonic power in me. Anyways after 2 weeks detox they tapered me of the lorazepam and Haldol and sent me home. I still felt massive derealization, had massive agoraphobia, social anxiety, psychomotor retardation, dark negative thoughts, severe fatigue, brain fog, zero appetite, racing thoughts, rumination, heart palpitations, severe insomnia etc.
But the worst was yet to come. Psychosis came back full force. I had the most intense delusions I was the like the evil Jesus and son of Satan. I thought the whole world was about to sacrifice me for the sins of the world. I saw 666 in everything and heard the devil talking to me, he was telling me I would be going to go to hell and all of my loved ones too. We would be sent to the deepest, darkest and most painful part of hell specially reserved for us. The rest of the world would be forgiven and sent to heaven and even Satan himself would be forgiven by God as long I was sacrificed to the world. I also heard a voice telling me I should torture and murder my father in order to come in a place in hell with a little less suffering. The voice told me that if I would murder my father, my suffering would be reduced in hell. I was lucky I did not kill my dad. I heard the devil talking to me how powerful he was. Very scary auditory hallucinations. My dad called the crisis service and they sent be to the psych ward and stayed there for 6 weeks. They put me on 20 mg olanzapine, 7,5 mg lorazepam and 100 mg nortryptyline .
The psych ward did not really help me mentally because I was surrounded by insane people that also suffered psychosis. I have seen the weirdest kind of people in the psych ward, I didn't even know people like that exist in real life. It was like I was the main character in a horror movie.
Anyways it took about 3 months for pregabalin withdrawal to slowly get better. The psychosis was gone after 3 months of withdrawal, the depression got better after 6 months and now 1 year later say I can say I am completely healed from a severe 10 grams a day pregabalin cold turkey withdrawal. All the symptoms are gone. I am also off every medication they gave me. I successfully tapered off 7,5 mg lorazepam, 30 mg olanzapine and 100 mg nortryptyline without any problems.
If a stupid pill popping junky can heal from this massive abuse, SO CAN ALL YOU GUYS! For some it just takes a little longer. I feel sorry for the people who only took low doses prescribed by a doctor and still suffer till this day. Just don’t give up. The brain can and will heal from this nasty drug"
I want to warn you! Try not to get addicted to this drug if you're a pill poppin junky like me. It will fuck you up. It was a traumatizing experience.
"Hi guys. I come here to tell you my pregabalin abuse story.
I was heavily addicted to pregabalin for around 7 months. I started using the Pfizer capsules. I started with a dose of 600mg a day. I immediately fell in love with the calm buzz and deep sleep it gave me. I suffer from anxiety and insomnia so this drug was helping me greatly.
Soon I needed more and more because I have a pretty big body and build up tolerance to any drug very quickly. Buying the capsules became a bit expansive, so I ordered a 1 kilo bag from a Chinese laboratory that just sent it at my doorstep in The Netherlands. My dosages soon reached 3000mg per day. On the last days of my use i was taking up to 10 grams. I know it sounds insane. I ordered another 1 kilo bag from China because I almost finished the whole 1 kilo bag after a couple of months of use. But the 1kg bag was seized by customs so I ran out of pregabalin. I did not have any money to buy the capsules, so I was forced to quit cold turkey last year. I thought I would get away with it. But I was wrong..... really wrong.
For a week without pregabalin I felt kind of strange, but nothing too serious. The only real negative so far was the fact I was not able to sleep at all for that whole week. At one day things started to get dark. I got an extreme feeling of impending doom and a massive panic attack. My heart was pounding so fast, I thought I was about to die. Derealization and massive anxiety kicked in and I was unable to move or talk to people. I started getting extremely scared and confused and I wanted to kill myself by jumping out of the window. Luckily my dad was watching over me and stopped me, or else I would have been dead right now.
My dad called 911 and they took me to the hospital where they gave me 2,5 lorazepam to calm me a bit down. I was feeling more calm but became delirious and started feeling an evil doomed depressed feeling that left me feeling severely suicidal again. They took to me a detox center where they gave me 7,5 mg lorazepam and a 2mg dose Haldol for psychosis. I was somewhat stable but was SEVERELY depressed. I never been so depressed in my whole life. I could barely move. I was also not able to sleep at all. Even with the high dose of lorazepam. And even if I slept, I had the worst dark hellish nightmares you could ever imaging. Every time I woke up in a confused state thinking I had a demonic power in me. Anyways after 2 weeks detox they tapered me of the lorazepam and Haldol and sent me home. I still felt massive derealization, had massive agoraphobia, social anxiety, psychomotor retardation, dark negative thoughts, severe fatigue, brain fog, zero appetite, racing thoughts, rumination, heart palpitations, severe insomnia etc.
But the worst was yet to come. Psychosis came back full force. I had the most intense delusions I was the like the evil Jesus and son of Satan. I thought the whole world was about to sacrifice me for the sins of the world. I saw 666 in everything and heard the devil talking to me, he was telling me I would be going to go to hell and all of my loved ones too. We would be sent to the deepest, darkest and most painful part of hell specially reserved for us. The rest of the world would be forgiven and sent to heaven and even Satan himself would be forgiven by God as long I was sacrificed to the world. I also heard a voice telling me I should torture and murder my father in order to come in a place in hell with a little less suffering. The voice told me that if I would murder my father, my suffering would be reduced in hell. I was lucky I did not kill my dad. I heard the devil talking to me how powerful he was. Very scary auditory hallucinations. My dad called the crisis service and they sent be to the psych ward and stayed there for 6 weeks. They put me on 20 mg olanzapine, 7,5 mg lorazepam and 100 mg nortryptyline .
The psych ward did not really help me mentally because I was surrounded by insane people that also suffered psychosis. I have seen the weirdest kind of people in the psych ward, I didn't even know people like that exist in real life. It was like I was the main character in a horror movie.
Anyways it took about 3 months for pregabalin withdrawal to slowly get better. The psychosis was gone after 3 months of withdrawal, the depression got better after 6 months and now 1 year later say I can say I am completely healed from a severe 10 grams a day pregabalin cold turkey withdrawal. All the symptoms are gone. I am also off every medication they gave me. I successfully tapered off 7,5 mg lorazepam, 30 mg olanzapine and 100 mg nortryptyline without any problems.
If a stupid pill popping junky can heal from this massive abuse, SO CAN ALL YOU GUYS! For some it just takes a little longer. I feel sorry for the people who only took low doses prescribed by a doctor and still suffer till this day. Just don’t give up. The brain can and will heal from this nasty drug"
I want to warn you! Try not to get addicted to this drug if you're a pill poppin junky like me. It will fuck you up. It was a traumatizing experience.
