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Esoteric [Ego-Death Subthread] Permanent / Irrecoverable Ego Loss

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patte4dm

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Jan 23, 2006
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Has anyone ever heard of anyone losing their ego completely from a psychadelic trip and never getting it back. I'v had some ego losses so bad that I thought that i'd never get back to reality and that my ego would be destroyed and it would be like starting life again. Anyone here ever hear of anyone getting stuck like this? Or anyother story's of people never returning from a bad trip.
 
If you didn't get your ego back you wouldn't be able to function at all. I think even those who become casualties from psychedelics still have their egos, just damaged ones.
 
^ i would not say damaged. there are ways to heal the ego, it may be a long process and you may need help. but some who have gone through this are in doubt because they think they are permanently damaged. this is an illusion.
 
Ha. If only I could anihilate my ego permanently...
 
You'd be catatonic, staring blankly at your surroundings.... right?

My ego loss experience was of the Salvian kind. I didn't know who I was, what people were, what planet earth was, etc.

I completely phased out and lost touch. It was horrifying, beautiful, and educational. It's been 10 months, and if I was still like that, I'd be in a mental ward all doped up right now. Hmm.. That don't sound TOO bad. =-)
 
Jefftildeath said:
You'd be catatonic, staring blankly at your surroundings.... right?
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no, because to be catatonic is to exist within the ego, because it is through the ego we experience catatonic states. full on ego loss would be when your mind and body are completely still and almost non-funcioning.
 
I am forevor paranoid and cannot stand going to the store where it is crowded. i get nervous around people i dont know and i shake sometimes due to nervousness. Fuckin hallucinogens man.
 
Medatripper Tates said:
no, because to be catatonic is to exist within the ego, because it is through the ego we experience catatonic states.
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i don't see catatonia and ego loss as mutually exclusive - care to elaborate on why you think they are?

Medatripper Tates said:
...when your mind and body are completely still and almost non-funcioning.
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you mean like a catatonic state? :)

alasdair
 
Medatripper Tates said:
no, because to be catatonic is to exist within the ego, because it is through the ego we experience catatonic states. full on ego loss would be when your mind and body are completely still and almost non-funcioning.
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Isn't catatonia a state where the mind and body are completely still and almost non-functioning?

I'm not sure how we experience catatonic states through the ego. It's almost like saying through the ego, we experience ego loss. Haha, what? Do people physically disappear during ego loss? =D

Oddly enough, I wasn't catatonic when I experienced ego loss. I was actually frantically running around my landlord's back yard. When I came to, I was back in my apartment with ripped pajama pants and soaking wet socks. Despite the fact that my body was far from still and quite functional, trust me, it was ego loss. There was NOTHING.

So I'm not saying that being catatonic and experiencing ego loss are mutually exclusive, it's obviously possible to experience ego loss (inside) and still have your physical body in full motion. Shit, you can cut a chicken's head off and it still runs around.
 
I dont get it, why would ego loss be associated with catatonic states? Ego is not your means of functioning, it's just a way of perceiving your mind and your world.
 
If you lose your ego, can you use the word 'I?' Do you understand it? Having never experienced, I wonder, because there is a difference between not having an ego and not knowing who you are. To be sight without being a thing seeing, is to have lost your ego. Is that what it's like?
 
Liric said:
I dont get it, why would ego loss be associated with catatonic states? Ego is not your means of functioning, it's just a way of perceiving your mind and your world.
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Nah, I see what you're saying. I just mentioned being catatonic because of the loss of conscious function associated with ego loss.

When I experienced ego loss, it wasn't as if everything was normal except for the fact I had no idea who I was. I mean, I didn't know what ANYTHING was. I was mentally catapulted to a place light years away from my human existence. I was in the Land of Honsorcelo, upon the Smelf Grid, on the Time Dot.

I never thought of ego loss as a state where you simply forget who you are, yet can fully function. No one is making a tray of lasagne while in the fathomless depths of ego loss. I couldn't picture playing some Connect Four while without my sense of self, or ability to accept that I'm a human being on planet earth. I was GONE.

So, although catatonia is a state of being completely still and unresponsive (which is what becomes of ones sense of self during ego loss), I admit that one can experience ego loss and still autonomously rise and flail, or whatever. Ego loss certainly doesn't equal a catatonic state, but I have no problem accepting that many ego loss experiences often involve the ego loser staring blankly and unresponsively into space.

Why? Do any of you think you experienced ego loss, yet could still go about your normal affairs (only without any knowledge of who you are)?

I also had an experience on psilocybin mushrooms in which I lost track of who I was. I was still functional, so I just checked my driver's liscence. "Oh, THAT'S who I am.". So there was loss of self, but not complete loss of ego. If I was experiencing full on ego loss, I don't think I'd have care who I was, or known to check my liscence.

Perhaps one could say there are different degrees of ego loss, but I consider true ego loss to be what I experienced on Salvia. 100% Oblivious maximus.
 
Wheres trip.more that dude doesn't even have an ego anymore.
 
For me ego loss means the inability to relate "I" with the world (memories and sense input.) Wich means you could stare into a wall, but beeing unable to know that you are staring into a wall, you may believe youre the wall. (typical salvia ego-loss effect)
 
alasdairm said:
i don't see catatonia and ego loss as mutually exclusive - care to elaborate on why you think they are?




you mean like a catatonic state? :)
Click to expand...

the definition of catatonic i referring to was

catatonia

a syndrome seen most frequently in schizophrenia, characterized by muscular rigidity and mental stupor, sometimes alternating with great excitement and confusion.
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am i missing something?
 
i don't understand why that (necessarily) dictates that the person is not in a state of ego loss.

alasdair
 
Everything you experience on LSD can be recovered and repaired, as long as you don't have a pre-existing medical condition like schizophrenia or psychosis. You aren't crazy are you?

You'll be fine, just take a few days to max and relax and you'll be good as new.
 
alasdairm said:
i don't understand why that (necessarily) dictates that the person is not in a state of ego loss.
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ahh mix up.. during the process of ego loss catatonia exists, but i was speaking of complete ego loss, where you are separate from the ego, where it cannot exist because catatonia is a function of the ego.
 
Without your ego you would be FUCKED.

Losing it or parts of it make for interesting thinking/feeling and learning (at times) but to lose it permanently would be somewhat like emptying out all the things you use as a frame of reference. You wouldn't know yourself , it'd be fucking lonely as HELL !


I tell you this is scary shit !
 
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