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  • EADD Moderators: axe battler | Pissed_and_messed

EADD Heroin Discussion v. XXII -- Brucey Bonus Beetles all round!

Just getting tuned up with the beetle first...ya never know... I'll probably have nothing left tomorrow which being Monday society might deem a good thing ;S
 
Sid said:
I envy your enthusiasm for the next binge. While mine for this one is dwindling...

1/4g and a bit of beetle left from 1.25. And about enough crack to blow the brains out just once more.

I notice the puking (and the rushes accompanying them) only seems to happen the first day. After 3 days I need to have a good few toots to catch a nod. This gear is fire aswell but I can see how expensive it must get for junkies, not quite as bad as coke/crack mind.
Click to expand...
The cost of a Smack habit is bitterly ironic - the first few months are cheap as piss, what's a ten bag of brown doing to your account?
It's only once the WD starts creeping into your soul that you realise how people lose everything to the shit, eventually you're dropping £50 on just enough to stop you projectile vomiting for 8 hours, it's costing you three quarters of your paycheck just to get well enough to work for that paycheck until that one fateful day where you overshoot and lose your job for being clearly smacked up or you take too little and go into full scale withdrawal in front of your boss.
Your habit is still just as expensive, but now you have no job, good luck getting a reference when you're fired for being a junkie bumfuck, then you descend into true unbreakable addiction - that spike looks oh so tempting when it halves the cost of the only bit of comfort and pleasure left in your shithole of a life. Then you rack up a record for petty convictions, explain those to your family, a prospective employer, the "friends" you once had. You can't. The only understanding, peace and escape is now tied up in a blunt, battered, and bloodied hypodermic on the floor of the temple of decadence and deceit your home has become. Your only way out is through the eye of the hollow Hell that landed you there in the first place.
 
6/7 years roughly, though I cycled through every Opioid available rather than purely H. Fentanyl was much more destructive.
 
Fair nuff, I've been using all n every opiate/oid since i was 20/21, I'm 29 now and have yet to have any of the issues you listed above, sure withdrawal is a bitch but never resorted to stealing or lost friends or jobs over it, I have a conviction but that was more to do with me actually selling things lol,

I think certain people are predisposed to that dark road you posted above

Edit: I am not saying for one second it WON'T happen, but so far so good
 
I think tbh FUBAR what bcf is saying holds some weight. If someone in their teens has depressive tendencies or is harbouring any other kind of demons it stands to reason they have a predisposition that makes them more likely to see the ugly side of things sooner than others.

I had a mate who was like that with other drugs, he was always from an early phase focusing on the negatives and questioning whether he had a problem, while everyone else was still in the phase of having fun getting high. Very quickly it became a self fulfilling prophecy for him.

Other people might use happily for long enough. Run into a problem non drug related which will lead to their use spiralling out of control. Some might never use to the point it's a problem, or stop immediately when it becomes one. Everyone is different. The danger applies to us all, but it applies to us all subjectively in different ways because of our unique characters, strengths and weaknesses.
 
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You've been lucky.

I used to be able to go to sleep with a wrap of gear in my bedside drawer and not think about it till the following evening. Then sometime -- most probably, when I had a relative glut of gear available, more in a single score than I knew how long it would take me to smoke, which of course I interpreted as "less of a need to be careful about stashing it" -- I let my resolve slip a bit. To the point where I ended up locking my stash in a strongbox and putting it in a far corner of the loft. Of course, before too long I was opening the trapdoor, and practically floated up there .....
 
Not at all Julie I had a pretty serious problem with coke/crack snorting, smoking and pinning. But eventually pulled myself back out of it after years of problematic use and outrageous spending. But this is what I'm saying, our very characters define what is attractive to us in terms of drugs, and how we will use them. I know drugs change people but usually the underlying reasons determining why they use or how they will use is all there beforehand IMO/IME.
 
Sid said:
I think tbh FUBAR what bcf is saying holds some weight. If someone in their teens has depressive tendencies or is harbouring any other kind of demons it stands to reason they have a predisposition that makes them more likely to see the ugly side of things sooner than others.

I had a mate who was like that with other drugs, he was always from an early phase focusing on the negatives and questioning whether he had a problem, while everyone else was still in the phase of having fun getting high. Very quickly it became a self fulfilling prophecy for him.

Other people might use happily for long enough. Run into a problem non drug related which will lead to their use spiralling out of control. Some might never use to the point it's a problem, or stop immediately when it becomes one. Everyone is different. The danger applies to us all, but it applies to us all subjectively in different ways because of our unique characters, strengths and weaknesses.
Click to expand...

Yes, granted. But what Sprout said carries a lot of weight as well. Heroin addiction doesn't rely upon a certain personality type, or a certain character weakness to become a self fulfilling prophecy, it IS a self fulfilling prophecy. The only difference personality, character, resolve, etc makes is the length of time it takes to get there. No one is immune.
 
Addiction doesn't discriminate, and the first sign it's got you by the balls is thinking it's the flaws and mistakes of others that caused their problem.
No one is immune. It will get you. Maybe not now. Not next year. But keep rolling that dice and you'll have burned your paddle before realising you jumped into the creek.
 
^ this is what gets me with what your saying though. You can't see the difference between yourself and others Sprout. Your one of the most depressed sounding posters of this forum. If you went into taking heroin with an outlook on life like you seem to hold to me it seems pretty obvious that would have lead to you winding up in the worst possible situation compared to others. You seem to have this "I'm just a junkie fuck up" (Sorry but I've actually seen you post things calling yourself things like that so I'm using it) mentality. It's a shame you shouldn't look at yourself or present yourself like that. If you put out vibes like that or have a preconceived idea of that about yourself then people pick up on it and treat you as such; a victim. The same as your views of yourself wind up becoming a self fullfilling prophecy. And you seem to tar everyone with the same brush.

Not everyone walks into new drugs like 3-FPM and decides to IV it. I'm hoping this post won't offend you but it's the way I see it. If your going to fuck with potent drugs you need to have a bit of will power and some other interests. By the sounds of it you started at a young age. There were many factors in your own circumstance that lead it to become such a problem for you. And while I applaud you for wanting to warn others from falling down the same path I sometimes feel like you tar everyone with the same brush. I'm 5 years older than you and been using since I was 11. Only drug I've been addicted to was cocaine this year after using it 10 years. It's the fact I got a stone with the H this time that worries me more than I used the H tbh. We are not all inexperienced new users mate, I know your trying to help but hopefully those of us playing with the dragon know what we're fucking with :)
 
I'm not going to justify that with a full response.
You keep fucking with that dragon, you clearly know what you're doing. :)
 
I've done 3.7grams of smack in my entire life Sprout. I don't think I'll be robbing my gran or looked upon with disgust by my family anytime soon. You are applying your own situation and saying it will happen to everyone. It will happen to some, it won't happen to us all. BCF has been using longer than you and never allowed himself to IV or order fentanyl.

We all are different characters, we do things differently, we have different levels of how far we will push it. Different levels of mental strength and different weaknesses. And how much we value ourselves. This makes for different results, some may be similar, some entirely different. It's individuality which makes us interesting :)
 
I'm not sure mess with opiates n one day they'll get you. Raasy I thought you didn't do drugs?

Evey
 
The junkie begins by lying to himself. In time, he lies and steals from both his loved ones and the general public. At this point, he can be said to have forfeited his humanity.
 
Smoking some of the strongest stone i've ever had, ended up sick lol, head feels like an apache helicopter is taking off inside it! thank fuck I got some lush brown to help with the landing, holy shit tho.. this is insane
 
yeah in terms of buying it as actual rock aswell that's the best I've ever had. but I've never seen anyone selling ammonia washed stuff before either like that and only even made it myself with ammonia a handful of times. Amazon seem to be cunts about shipping the right stuff for it these days so it was usually done with bicarb when i was busy on it.

That's me on a break now until the end of next month at least finished everything last night. Seemed to be alot of stuff gathered in the tooter compared to normal but then prob down to went through more gear/tooters than usual heh :S
 
I never really understood the physical effects of coke withdrawal???
for those that started out before 98 will have experienced a completely different kind of the drug.
one day,literally overnight,the dealers all had this new gear that was half the price and pale rather than the darker brown we were used to
being more affordable meant less crime initially,but it came with insane,kick you in the ass withdawal
so,things got back to normal(ish)
 
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