bunnymunro
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Sep 4, 2012
- Messages
- 480
I find it a double-edge sword...i am approaching 50, and single, although have a string of non-successful relationships. Although i remain friends with all, if not most of my exes. In fact last week one of them approached me about acquiring a substance to make her and a mate be sharper at a school reunion, lol. She had used speed, just once before, with me.
Now it seems like the women I date fall into two categories... ones that have used none or little drugs, they have lead "wholesome" lives, and have never considered dating a user, as they just havent been exposed to the lifestyle.
Or, ones that have been users or addicts in their past and dont want to go down that path again...kudos to them.
My last girlfriend was a long term meth user, and as it was a long distance relationship, and I am drug tested at work, I would go to my place and not use as i knew no dealers,and actively did not seek any. However, when we started seeing each other, it was party time for me, hitting the pipe big time, for several weeks and then leaving her to go back to work. I was earning big money and buying grams wasnt knocking my budget about at all.
She had been on what I call "the P-go-round" for years, doing the odd shady deal, looking after stuff, balancing dollars you know how it goes, but there is always a bag in the house, although there is never any cash...
I told her that I couldn't consider a future with her if she remains a full time user, as I wasn't prepared to blow my substantial income on fuelling our habits which is what I could see us doing if we were to look at a future.
So, she actually gave up the pipe, while i was away at work,and I didnt see her for a couple of months while she did so. I was very happy for her, and aware that a couple of months is only a short time to have given it away, she reckoned it wasn't for me, she was goingto one day anyway, and she just wanted to. So of course, the next time I went to stay with her, we drove past our dealer's house a couple of times, and she asked me if I wanted to go see Ted, to which I replied, no, its all good. I hadn't had a pipe for a couple of months, but I associate 'holidays' to this particular area with a binge. Long story short, she reckoned that she was able to use with me for the couple or three weeks while I was there, and then quit again. And she did.... the first time. I went back to my island state, she went back to motherhood and work and life, even though the usual pressures of a long term user lifestyle were still about her.
She came and visited me, after I had been over there, for an unexpected funeral for my bro who committed suicide, and of course to help me deal with this i used P, so its a cop out, but so what...maybe i used the death as an excuse... no,scrub that... i just like to use it. So she supported me during the unfortunate event, and then she came back to my island state where I don't use, except for speed sometimes, as the crew i hang with dont accept meth,as in pure or ice form... (we won't get into that...)
Lost my train of thought, other than to say that one night, she went totally feral on me, saying that she had given up for me,and I constantly re-lead her back to her addiction. Which is quite true... so yes, I do like a partner that uses, but not as a habit... I know that I will use until I run out, and then go get some more... but as i work several weeks on/off, I do stop before I go to work and clear the system. However I like to reward myself for the inconveniance of work with a bit of party...
So... sorry about the long rambling, and probably pointless post, but now I am single again, so ... any hot BL chicks who want to try their luck....?
Actually that was just a side thought...I am not saying that I thought it OK for me to use and not her, but what I am saying is that I wasn't prepared to fund her full time habit whilst she was on benefit and struggling, and I was at work and straight, i.e. if you can't afford the habit, expect to pay your way...
On the other hand, I have a mate who is a P meth addict as his lady, he is a main earner, and she works, but doesn't earn enough to fund her habit... he looks on it quite philosophically,(and perhaps chauvinistically) that having a girlfriend is going to cost you money...
Anyways, my 50c worth...
Now it seems like the women I date fall into two categories... ones that have used none or little drugs, they have lead "wholesome" lives, and have never considered dating a user, as they just havent been exposed to the lifestyle.
Or, ones that have been users or addicts in their past and dont want to go down that path again...kudos to them.
My last girlfriend was a long term meth user, and as it was a long distance relationship, and I am drug tested at work, I would go to my place and not use as i knew no dealers,and actively did not seek any. However, when we started seeing each other, it was party time for me, hitting the pipe big time, for several weeks and then leaving her to go back to work. I was earning big money and buying grams wasnt knocking my budget about at all.
She had been on what I call "the P-go-round" for years, doing the odd shady deal, looking after stuff, balancing dollars you know how it goes, but there is always a bag in the house, although there is never any cash...
I told her that I couldn't consider a future with her if she remains a full time user, as I wasn't prepared to blow my substantial income on fuelling our habits which is what I could see us doing if we were to look at a future.
So, she actually gave up the pipe, while i was away at work,and I didnt see her for a couple of months while she did so. I was very happy for her, and aware that a couple of months is only a short time to have given it away, she reckoned it wasn't for me, she was goingto one day anyway, and she just wanted to. So of course, the next time I went to stay with her, we drove past our dealer's house a couple of times, and she asked me if I wanted to go see Ted, to which I replied, no, its all good. I hadn't had a pipe for a couple of months, but I associate 'holidays' to this particular area with a binge. Long story short, she reckoned that she was able to use with me for the couple or three weeks while I was there, and then quit again. And she did.... the first time. I went back to my island state, she went back to motherhood and work and life, even though the usual pressures of a long term user lifestyle were still about her.
She came and visited me, after I had been over there, for an unexpected funeral for my bro who committed suicide, and of course to help me deal with this i used P, so its a cop out, but so what...maybe i used the death as an excuse... no,scrub that... i just like to use it. So she supported me during the unfortunate event, and then she came back to my island state where I don't use, except for speed sometimes, as the crew i hang with dont accept meth,as in pure or ice form... (we won't get into that...)
Lost my train of thought, other than to say that one night, she went totally feral on me, saying that she had given up for me,and I constantly re-lead her back to her addiction. Which is quite true... so yes, I do like a partner that uses, but not as a habit... I know that I will use until I run out, and then go get some more... but as i work several weeks on/off, I do stop before I go to work and clear the system. However I like to reward myself for the inconveniance of work with a bit of party...
So... sorry about the long rambling, and probably pointless post, but now I am single again, so ... any hot BL chicks who want to try their luck....?
Actually that was just a side thought...I am not saying that I thought it OK for me to use and not her, but what I am saying is that I wasn't prepared to fund her full time habit whilst she was on benefit and struggling, and I was at work and straight, i.e. if you can't afford the habit, expect to pay your way...
On the other hand, I have a mate who is a P meth addict as his lady, he is a main earner, and she works, but doesn't earn enough to fund her habit... he looks on it quite philosophically,(and perhaps chauvinistically) that having a girlfriend is going to cost you money...
Anyways, my 50c worth...
