Yeah, hate to say this but your an addict. I realize now that when I was at 60-90mg a day that was the point where it wasnt really recreational anymore for me. Maybe I wasnt the IV heroin addict I ended up becoming later but I was well on my way to arriving there.
These dreams are the first stage of addiction. It shows that you subconsciously think about them in some regard which is definitely a mental addiction and thats the first step. I submit to you that you are becoming an addict and if you do not stop you will eventually need to quit or switch due to cost... I switched to heroin and that was a 3 year thing that i am just now on the other side of. You are at the beginning i was in 2010-11, people will warn you to stop but I can say I was you and I wish I stopped. This wont stop you as no one stopped me but I now know what it is to hold my dead lover and beg her to not leave me alone in this world, she didnt but she almost did. It is a memory that is burned into my head and is one of the regrets that I have from doing heroin. And that is the only thing that bothers me today, its not the graphic injection scenes in movies or documentaries its the people who are grieving over loss of a loved one saying "it should have been me" I know what thats like, i almost killed someone i love, and part of me deeply regrets that I can understand what that is like.