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Does anyone else like pursuing girls/guys at work?

IAmJacksUserName

IAmJacksUserName

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Sep 11, 2004
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I personally think it's the best, at least in my situation. At work, you can always find excuses to talk to people, so you can get to know someone and decide if you like them much more naturally and without being stalkerish. Plus, because people are naturally restrained when it comes to mixing work, sex and love, there's much less pressure to make a move quickly, so you can go at a slow pace and let tension build until it finally erupts in sex. I'm also lucky because I have a job where most people I work with are passionate about their jobs, and all we want to do outside of work is talk about work. Furthermore, we all work crazy hours and get every Friday off, so it's easy to call someone up on a Thursday and say "yo, all my other friends have to work tomorrow, wanna grab a drink?"

Obviously, getting with co-workers has its downsides. My rule is that I never try to fuck someone I work with unless I want to go for a relationship. But because turnover at my job is high (I live abroad and work mostly with expatriates, who often shuffle in and out), I go through this a lot. I know I'm probably in the minority here, but does anyone else see work as their primary prowling ground for relationships? Anyone have any tips to share?
 
^ what happens when it goes really badly wrong and you have to continue to work with that person?

alasdair
 
bad idea imo and in my experience

you should never shit where you eat
 
Last thing I want to do is talk about shop when I leave work. Even worse is having an argument with a partner then not having the space to cool my heels at work for a few hours then later surprising her with flowers.
 
^ totally agree.
Weird thing is when you're at work you can find a million things to talk about. Soon as you meet in the real world its kinda awkward and you just end slagging off the office snitch or moaning about the paperwork or whatever.

A bit of flirting does help pass the time tho. My personal favorite is to flirt away, really turn on the charm 'till they're frothing at the gash, then for no apparent reason stop talking to them and / or be hostile and rude.

Their little faces, always so hurt and confused. Bless 'em.

Not sure why I keep doing it.
 
Noodle said:
bad idea imo and in my experience

you should never shit where you eat
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This.

I dated a guy I worked with once and it was at a temp job but it was a bad idea since even though it was a large company and we worked in different departments we saw each other way too often. Five days a week all day at work, and then one day on the weekend. Also it was not a big deal to me that I was dating him or dating a man but he had issues with this and thought that nobody knew but of course it was not difficult to tell and yeah people did know.

I have had men and women who I worked with flirt with me but no matter how hot they are I won't ever date or get into a relationship with anyone who I work with.
 
soaring peace said:
A bit of flirting does help pass the time tho. My personal favorite is to flirt away, really turn on the charm 'till they're frothing at the gash, then for no apparent reason stop talking to them and / or be hostile and rude.

Their little faces, always so hurt and confused. Bless 'em.

Not sure why I keep doing it.
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I'm not sure why you keep doing it either. You are either a sociopath or an asshole. Which is it?
 
Had a sexual relationship with a guy at work once. It eventually turned sour and he quit because of it.

Won't do that again.
 
Absolutely not. I don't shit where I sleep. I wasn't born a trust fund baby so I need my job to suport myself and I would never put myself in a position where I needed to uproot because a social situation has gone bad and now work is a hostile place to be. It's not worth the risk, in my opinion.
 
I personally think this is a bad idea, but that's just me. you're an adult, and free to screw whomever

I just try to avoid problematic situations that mess up the flow of everything as much as possible, in life. and banging a co-worker, as I've found out, is a fucking Pandora's Box
 
Hmmm... interesting that no one agrees with me. I'm a newspaper reporter, and for some reason its pretty common in the industry to date other reporters. I think part of it is that journalists are an odd bunch, so it's easier to stay within your own kind, so to speak, both romantically and platonically. We all go to the same bars after work, are members of the same clubs, take drugs together, etc. As a result, our social lives and our professional lives are heavily mixed together. That also means that by the time you actually make a move, you're already friends with them outside the office.


alasdairm said:
^ what happens when it goes really badly wrong and you have to continue to work with that person?

alasdair
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That's the tricky part, and some people can handle it and others can't. You have to really be selective and choose someone who you feel that if things started going south, you'd be able to let things end with a modicum of respect remaining. That's why I never fuck around at work, because it's really not worth the risk just for a shag. But, when it comes to finding someone for a serious relationship, I've been more likely to find it in a fellow journalist than anyone else. Doesn't mean that I only date journalists, but I think that if/when I get married, she will likely be someone I met through work.

But yeah, everyone here is making me think that my line of work is very much an exception.
 
I worked in a corporate office and there was a lot of mingling work with socializing going on. Initially, I always tried to avoid the drama but quickly discovered that even if I didn't paint a target on my back a lot of my colleagues were still sharks with no qualms about sabotaging me if it looked like they'd profit from my loss. Having been through that, I just laugh heartily at anyone who tells me not to "shit where I eat". The lunchroom was already full of shit when I got there.
 
I don't think I could ever date someone from work. Not that they're not awesome people but things happens, people break up, it becomes awkward. Yeah.
 
Jerry Atrick said:
At least you're honest about it :D It's prolly easier to quit being an asshole than it is to quit being a sociopath. ymmv.
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Like ive already said, I honestly don't know why i do it.
In my defence I'm 30 something and the women Im flirting with are also 30 something, not vulnerable or impressionable young girls, knew all know i have a partner.
The flirting and sexual tension makes the days pass quicker, then one day I just can't stand to be in the same room as them.

Can cause some minor problems if they're in a more senior position.
People often ask what the hells happened and I never know what to say..
 
Definitly a no go.
I enjoy getting some nibbles on the ol flirt bait every once in awhile if their cute but I'm not really pursuing anything.
That even gets annoying.
 
I'd prefer people I work with to just stick with doing an awesome job @ getting their part of the job done.
I work for myself now, so that is even more important.
Back in the day.... whooo lol maybe another story... Still, was more people in the same-big-company that you only see in the morning or at employee parties/get togethers, than it was like co-workers that you have to rub shoulders with, where things could potentially get awkward.
 
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