I got to the point where I hated the pv but was still buying it because it had gotten control over me. Worst thing is it was so fucking cheap aswell.
If it had been sold in 20mg doses and you could only order once a week then it might have been less of a problem. But basically I was on it all day every day for 2 years, vaping it, snorting it, eating it, all for a short lived rush and then days of paranoia and anxiety.
Another problem is it tastes really nice, like a sweetshop.
I would never advise anyone to dabble with it, even the most experienced stim heads had issues with it. It was a fucking rollercoaster ride, at first I was learning loads of chemistry up to first year organic chem level while using the pv for focus, but before long it ultimately completely destroyed my life, my sanity, my relationsbips with my family and friends, and almost caused my death. And it got me sectioned under the mental health act several times so I was detained in mental hospital in a secure ward and not allwoed to leave.
2 years of living ina constant state of heightening anxiety and paranoia, along with anorexia, when I finally cleaned up my act, it felt like I had come back from a war in afghanistan or something it was that terrifying annd fucked up. PTSD for years afterwards.
So yeah, you made the right choice leaving it alone man.