Hi everybody.
The first time I felt derealized was in 2009 after my third time of weed smoking. I was 16. There were classic symptoms like emotionless, living in a dream in a bad way, like watching a movie. It was scary but as I remember I also had panic attacks so all the derealization symptoms were cutted off because my whole mind was full of thoughts about panic attacks and so on. Somehow I cured it and everything was ok until February 2016 when I used to smoke once again. I felt alright but then in a couple of days I recognized that something wrong is happening like some bad thoughts are in my head against my will. Continuing for a week it turns to a panic attack. Then I felt very anxious for a month and after that I began to notice changes in perception. For example, I began to think is that all real, am I real when talking to somebody. It is difficult to describe, like you're riding on a bus and close your eyes and you can't be sure that when you open them you still be there or when you are in a toilette with the door closed you are in a doubt if it is still that place outside from which you came here. I also feel like something wrong with time perception like I don't feel "passing of time". Sometimes it is frightening me a lot. But the thing that frightens me most is like what if it is forever?
What do you think about it?
Sorry for my English, I live in Russia so English is not my native language.
I'm writing here because there is not a lot of information about this in Russian Internet.
Waiting for your reply,
Thanks.
The first time I felt derealized was in 2009 after my third time of weed smoking. I was 16. There were classic symptoms like emotionless, living in a dream in a bad way, like watching a movie. It was scary but as I remember I also had panic attacks so all the derealization symptoms were cutted off because my whole mind was full of thoughts about panic attacks and so on. Somehow I cured it and everything was ok until February 2016 when I used to smoke once again. I felt alright but then in a couple of days I recognized that something wrong is happening like some bad thoughts are in my head against my will. Continuing for a week it turns to a panic attack. Then I felt very anxious for a month and after that I began to notice changes in perception. For example, I began to think is that all real, am I real when talking to somebody. It is difficult to describe, like you're riding on a bus and close your eyes and you can't be sure that when you open them you still be there or when you are in a toilette with the door closed you are in a doubt if it is still that place outside from which you came here. I also feel like something wrong with time perception like I don't feel "passing of time". Sometimes it is frightening me a lot. But the thing that frightens me most is like what if it is forever?
What do you think about it?
Sorry for my English, I live in Russia so English is not my native language.
I'm writing here because there is not a lot of information about this in Russian Internet.
Waiting for your reply,
Thanks.
