I have too much to type about my relationship with my mother but it is very troubled. Its basically a love/hate relationship. I can't stand being around her, she ruins my life but at the same time we talk 3 times a day on the phone. I'm currently on vacation with her and she has decided she wants to go home early because she thinks I'm ungrateful. She came to enjoy time with my two young boys but my 4 year old son has lost interest in her (thats the best way I can describe it however it is more complicated than that). She is the most impatient, naive, ignorant, annoying, unbearable person you have ever met (many people would agree with me). Anyone out there dealing with a family member that has a low IQ or is emotionally incompetent but doesn't know it?
Dealing with mother issues and need advice
- Thread starter ajcook
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stanleyoak
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Yes, i can totally relate, i have a sister that fits that description even as vague as it is. No matter how many times i try to put her on the right path it ends up being another failure because of her stubbornness. I have tried everything from counseling to just putting myself in her shoes at time(not literally). Nothing has seemed to work though. Honestly for your kids id try and stay the whole vacation that you have planned, but after that i think distancing yourself from your mother would help for sure. Youll learn to appreciate her more and she will do the same. Time heals everything, sometimes the best thing to do is nothing. CHeers
belligerent drunk
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My mother is schizophrenic among other mental disorders. She's intelligent, however, but sometimes she deludes herself to a sad extent. Sometimes it's very hard to deal with her, which is why I consider me moving out of my parents' house one of the best decisions I've made in my life. Still, she's my mother, and I know that it is not her fault that she is that way. When I was younger, I would get angry with her for the way she behaved or what she said, but then I realized that it doesn't help the situation, and the best approach is to be respectful and supportive. It may be hard at times, but life ain't always a piece of cake.
You're a grown person, and you have your own family. You don't have to deal with your mother all the time, so take your time, and try not to take it too seriously. It may go a long way. You can't change your mother, so why stress over it so much?
Respect your mother.
You're a grown person, and you have your own family. You don't have to deal with your mother all the time, so take your time, and try not to take it too seriously. It may go a long way. You can't change your mother, so why stress over it so much?
Respect your mother.
iridescentblack
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My mother's a Pisces. I feel you.
pofacedhoe
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what has she done or you said?
socko
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You are free to cut off contact.
Maybe your mother has an undiagnosed mental illness and/or personality disorder. Maybe she is also a hatelful and toxic personality. One characteristic of these people is that they think they are golden, and everybody else is out to get them or stupid. They lack self-awareness. Every interaction with her is damaging to you. Cut off all contact, and your life will be better.
Such was my own mother. I had to cut off contact. She had been dead to me long before, and she eventually died. I did not go to the funeral and i don't know where her corpse or ashes are located. I wish I had had a real mother who was not a wire monkey who administered electric shocks. I don't miss the one I got stuck with.
It's a mistake that our society allows just anybody to breed, even unfit, violently insane, abusive and criminal people . STrangely, people who wish to adopt must go through an intense screening process.
Maybe your mother has an undiagnosed mental illness and/or personality disorder. Maybe she is also a hatelful and toxic personality. One characteristic of these people is that they think they are golden, and everybody else is out to get them or stupid. They lack self-awareness. Every interaction with her is damaging to you. Cut off all contact, and your life will be better.
Such was my own mother. I had to cut off contact. She had been dead to me long before, and she eventually died. I did not go to the funeral and i don't know where her corpse or ashes are located. I wish I had had a real mother who was not a wire monkey who administered electric shocks. I don't miss the one I got stuck with.
It's a mistake that our society allows just anybody to breed, even unfit, violently insane, abusive and criminal people . STrangely, people who wish to adopt must go through an intense screening process.
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Pretty_Diamonds
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Mhmm, what did you need advice on? My advice, love is acceptance. My mother is asian and SUCH a bitch. Like she's super mean, but I deal with her since I love her. Honestly, the trick is finding a man who will love and accept her... lmao.. my current bf despises her... so it's rough.
But if you're looking for empathy, I got ya. ;D
But if you're looking for empathy, I got ya. ;D
Thanks peeps, it helps to vent and hear about others dealing with difficult family members. I basically always have to take the blame for everything and then it gets better. I guess I just wish I could get her to see a real psychiatrist who could evaluate her so its not just me thinking she serious problems but a professional. I have been to a therapist to deal with her and what to do to improve our relationship and it helped for awhile but I need her to be analyzed for personality disorders and even her IQ checked, it would just verify somethings for me and help me deal with her with more sympathy than anger.I do agree belligerent drunk and I need to respect her. Thanks everyone.