Day 6 Poppy Seed Tea WD

[aphexia]

Afternoon all,

Please forgive me if I'm a little foggy but if you know you know.

So I've jumped off the dreaded brown elixer of pleasing, calming slow death (hopefully 3rd times the charm) and I'm looking for any tips to help with reducing Wd's / Replenishing nutrients.

My last break was Christmas last year and I made it around 2 weeks before my inabillity to function well enough in my own business pushed me back to the slop.

I've been using hard for the last 4-5 years and dabbling for 10+ current dose was around 1200g a day in 3 doses at the end (around 1500g a day last year though)

So-far the ride has been:

Day 1 - Tired, little snotty, pupils are getting huge - oh oh
Day 2 - BANG - Severe Diahoreha / Severe Vomiting / Hot Cold Sweats / Flashes / No sleep / Cramps / Restless legs
Day 3 - Rinse / Repeat
Day 4 - Vomiting down to 1 / Diahoreha slowing slightly / Forced myself to eat something / The WORST Stomach Acid / Gas
Day 5 - Vomit stop / Diahoreha slowing more / Antsy / Alien Skin feeling / Insomnia

Day 6 - Been forcing more food in than last 2 days, Bannanas, Corn Flakes, Up&Go Drinks

Any help would greatly be appreciated


Thanks,
Dumb (I'll only do em 1 every 2 weeks) Arse

 

[Nightraver]

You are past the worst point man good for you buddy. Ime the first three to five days are the worst now each day will get a little better as each one comes
Keep up the good work maté you have passed the hardest bit now it’s just keeping it up and looking forward to the day coming real soon when you are free of the dreaded chains of opioid addiction
You got this man

 

[aphexia]

Thanks very much for the kind words Nightraver, I've read your message a few times today for a bolster-up.

Got to say I'm much better again today apart from gastro & anxiousness.... I've actually managed to have a laugh here and there and teared up a bunch listening to some sad piano renditions.

Really hoping I've got this... have been craving a drink more than the dope though.

Much love your way

 

[Nightraver]

Thanks very much for the kind words Nightraver, I've read your message a few times today for a bolster-up.

Got to say I'm much better again today apart from gastro & anxiousness.... I've actually managed to have a laugh here and there and teared up a bunch listening to some sad piano renditions.

Really hoping I've got this... have been craving a drink more than the dope though.

Much love your way

Don’t fall into the pit of swapping one chain for another my friend it’s very easy to do especially with the drink being so socially acceptable
You are getting better every day bud

Just keep going you got this man. I kid you not man you’re getting past the worst. Even if it doesn’t feel like it you are getting better every day and you’re body is getting stronger each hour you abstain
You got this mate i promise you you’ll be better soon

 

[aphexia]

Thanks again Nightraver,

Very kind of you, I tried to respond a few days ago but missed my password a bunch of times and locked my account, seems to work now though...
2 weeks clean, feeling much better again, still an effort walking around and going out, motor skills feel shot to shit and emotions are amped up (mainly joy and love thankfully) but I'm doing much better

Don’t fall into the pit of swapping one chain for another my friend it’s very easy to do especially with the drink being so socially acceptable
You are getting better every day bud

I've had a few drinks the last few nights but no-where near as much pre-tea-kick, really takes the edge off but I'm keeping one eye on it for sure.

This one's the charm for sure, I ain't going back down that dark road (this is cold turkey no.3)

Back to work tomorrow but I've told myself this week, if I get buggered, I'm going home, fuckem'


Cheers for everything mate

 

[Nightraver]

Thanks again Nightraver,

Very kind of you, I tried to respond a few days ago but missed my password a bunch of times and locked my account, seems to work now though...
2 weeks clean, feeling much better again, still an effort walking around and going out, motor skills feel shot to shit and emotions are amped up (mainly joy and love thankfully) but I'm doing much better



I've had a few drinks the last few nights but no-where near as much pre-tea-kick, really takes the edge off but I'm keeping one eye on it for sure.

This one's the charm for sure, I ain't going back down that dark road (this is cold turkey no.3)

Back to work tomorrow but I've told myself this week, if I get buggered, I'm going home, fuckem'


Cheers for everything mate

I jumped off opiates years ago before my accident and had to go back in them for actual pain but the addict in me was still there waiting over ten years later so just be careful my friend but from experience mate you have passed the worst definitely. You just have to keep your self busy or distracted from boredom as that is a dangerous thing for the first couple of months even try a small vape of weed rather than a drink to help you sleep as in my opinion is far less harmful to your body than a beer or wine/spirit and far easier to control or come off of completely than alcohol which is literally a killer for some people to come off.

But my friend you are definitely doing great and you’re effort is going to pay off better every day after a couple of months you will be able to function socially and work better than you feel now so keep up your excellent work you have proven yourself to have enough self control to get through the physical part now you just have to keep it up and you will beat this mate and well done for coming this far

 

[aphexia]

Thanks again Nightraver,

I hope you can manage to get off / stay off there's nothing worse than being a slave, not only do you feel like shit in the morning but it really restricts your freedom and it's like having a hammer floating over your head.... one little thing goes wrong and you're sick and non-functioning without any way to explain, not to mention the financial / emotional costs.

It'll be 3 weeks for me on Monday, I've been working all this week, starting out half days and slowly working myself to full days, I'm tired and shaky by the time I leave but I'm getting faster at recovering after a lie down.

Honestly my biggest fear was that I wouldn't be able to function socially with customers & family but I managing that well.... I had very severe social anxiety and some depression when I was younger due to severe bullying in high school... opiates dulled that and I was able to take more risks & learn how to communicate & relate to people better, I also learned that as people get older they are not there to tease and belittle you.... (not to mention feeling awesome the whole time while doing it lol)

I do honestly still think opiates helped me learn how to function socially but the price was very high, maybe I would have gotten out of that funk naturally but I'm grateful to only have mild anxiety here and there now, it would have killed me eventually.

I'm going to slowly taper down my drinking (it's not like I'm drinking obscene amounts but it's still way too much to be healthy, 6-8 drinks a afternoon/night, not good I know) but I'm taking it one step at a time.

EDIT - Just a side note for a laugh, I was looking through my old posts and I was wrong about the 5 year thing, I've been dabbling for damn near 20 years and a slave for around 7, if anybody thinks it's too late... have a think about that.

Thanks for being a good dude / dude-ette

 

[AlphaMethylPhenyl]

as people get older they are not there to tease and belittle you.... (not to mention feeling awesome the whole time while doing it lol)

EDIT - Just a side note for a laugh, I was looking through my old posts and I was wrong about the 5 year thing, I've been dabbling for damn near 20 years and a slave for around 7, if anybody thinks it's too late... have a think about that.

Not to derail, but I read that blurb and I was like "whoa, so true!" I got picked on a lot, too, but I'm trying to appreciate now more so that people do mature and become more humane to others. People in their teens or early 20's are still kind of vain, like they think with their reflexes and don't consider the bigger picture.

It's really cool that you're still getting clean despite how long you've been at it. Not many people decide to do that. Seven years a slave no more!

As for drinking, I'd just like to quip that substitute addiction can be a real risky game changer, so maybe consider this when you reach for a drink. I know it's already been said. Just want to express my agreement.

Also, I know you said that things are better wrt your mental health these days, if I read right, but maybe there are some unresolved issues that led you to pick up drugs in the first place. Talking to someone who listens to you about this can be good. Could be that you're clinically depressed and anxious beyond the withdrawal you're experiencing. Maybe medication would help, gotta say, maybe not.

 

[aphexia]

Not to derail, but I read that blurb and I was like "whoa, so true!" I got picked on a lot, too, but I'm trying to appreciate now more so that people do mature and become more humane to others. People in their teens or early 20's are still kind of vain, like they think with their reflexes and don't consider the bigger picture.

It really is true, real empathy seems to take longer in some people than others and hey, some never change but they are the very small minority... I've always logically known that most adults aren't full of malice and are trying to put people at ease but there was always that reptile brain screaming "I see that mask you've got on now, I know what you were like when we were teenagers, bet you haven't changed".... "you're just better at acting now".

I knew it wasn't true but it was still back there hiding... the more you interact with others and have positive experiences the more that thorn slowly gets worn down to a nub... these day's I enjoy a good ribbing as I know that the absolute most of the time, it's for a laugh (bonding) & the very rare times that I can tell it's not, I feel pity for them more than myself.

*EDIT* I think one of the main reasons that I couldn't trust anyone for such a long time was that it all stemmed from my very unfortunate last name... it wasn't just the main group that latched onto me hard verbally & physically but it was seemingly everyone, people I don't know, people I had never met or people I had previously been nice to... every 30 minutes or however damned long a class went for, I would be reminded with roll-call what people think of me...

I've met many of the people that made my life torture back then, most have treated me like an old friend, some have apologized and a couple acted as a friend then went on to belittle everyone around them, people are people I just told the nasty ones firmly to get the fuck away from me.

Sorry for the long winded, whiney, bitching it just kinda flowed.

It's really cool that you're still getting clean despite how long you've been at it. Not many people decide to do that. Seven years a slave no more!

As for drinking, I'd just like to quip that substitute addiction can be a real risky game changer, so maybe consider this when you reach for a drink. I know it's already been said. Just want to express my agreement.

Thanks AMP, this is something I will focus on more, I know you and Nightraver are right, I was drinking 3 hard ciders that were nearly 8% and a couple of beers after detox but I've swapped over to 4.5% low carb beers and I'm going to slowly taper down, starting later in the night and have 1 less every few days or so.

When I was on the seed I would have 5-6 hard ciders, a few beers and 5-6 shots of Gin a night so at least I've got a head start.... brilliant idea on a strong CNS depressant I know but tolerance is a helluva thing

Thanks again AMP and please realize that anxiety & miss-trust will fade, it's hard to say what works, everyone is different, the best advice I can think to tell people is gentle exposure, don't let mates or family say, I know what we'll do, we'll take you to a loud club get you some drinks and start some conversations with people for you.... all I would do is disassociate, clam up, sweat bullets and count the minutes down... little steps are the best way, a place / person where you are only a little uncomfortable and can bail as soon as it become too intense.... that and time...

 

[TheUltimateFixx]

Plenty water, electrolytes, get your vitamins. Hot showers / baths to relax. If you're feeling restless a mild sedative.

You seem to be going ok; I went cold off opium once and that was a hellish experience. Xd

 

[aphexia]

Thanks UltimateFixx,

That's something I've been focusing on too, the bedroom looks like a pharmacy with all the vitamins lol
I've been avoiding anything pharmaceutical though.... so glad that I didn't crack and seek bupe or methadone... I'd hate to kick it down the road for another ride... I understand if some people need those though.

I got a little too involved in Klonopin, Valium & Xanax years ago, though I thankfully left it behind before it was too deep.


Some things that I think have maybe helped for others is:

(this is my experiences, might / probably will be wrong)

-First few days-
Nothing is really going to help but lots of water which you probably wont hold onto for more than 15 minutes at a time but gerrit inya!
Showers are going to feel like running 10 miles but it'll get the weird alien slime and stink off you.
I tried drinking electrolytes but I find the acid too much to bear.
ENO - (magic stuff) it's a bicarb drink that neutralizes stomach acid, try to limit it to maybe twice a day max as it messes with your natural ability to fix the acid, it'll also cause you to shit black sandy tar when things slow down which is pleasant.
The way I take ENO is pour a little less than a cup of water (make sure there is headroom as it'll fizz) then drop a heaped teaspoon in stir and as soon as it fizzes hard, skull! coats all the tubes

-When things slow down-
I found Bannanas to be the best thing to eat followed by Corn Flakes with Almond Milk (I hate the stuff but it digests easily)
Lots of other fruits when you can
Vegetables, raw if you can or boiled
Magnesium baths, hot as you can take (which is horrible but you feel much better when you are out), helps sweat out the poison too

-After the Vomitfest-
Multivitamins
Some sleep formula that includes Valerian Root Extract, could be a placebo but I think it helps
Small amounts of lean protein, grilled chicken (no spice) tuna things like that
Force yourself to get up and move around, it can be as simple as go outside, sit in the sun for 5 minutes then slump back on the bed.

-After most of the physical hell-
Try to exercise
Try to get back to work but make sure that recovery comes before EVERYTHING - shit you might lose customers (too bad) - you might even get fired (better than killing yourself) - family / friends might get the shits with you (they will get over it and will like you a lot better when you can actually say DO THINGS)
If you play an instrument, pick it up and play, you might be surprised like me to find out that you can still do it sober! great for getting emotions out!
Music - WOW! feel like I did when I was a teenager listening, I can take so much more in and feel so much more (warning you may cry like a pussy )

I would love to get hold of some weed to be honest but it's only medically legal here and hard to get prescribed.
Probably would have some sources if I dug but I dunno.

If I think of or learn any more I'll add them too.

 

[TheUltimateFixx]

Valerian I've also used; no it's not a placebo, it's one of those plants that actually has been medically tested, and it does have sedative properties.

I second bananas. Will also add plain live yoghurt or better still kefir, it really helps balance out your upset guts, plus salt crackers / day-old white bread, plain boiled rice, grated apple and fresh pineapple. Ginger or peppermint tea helps with the nausea.

 

[aphexia]

I've been meaning to get some Yoghurt and I've heard great things about Ginger Tea too.

I found plain bread and things like rice a bit to hard to swallow without throwing up but that could just be me being a wimp too

 

[Nightraver]

See you aren’t alone in your struggle on here bud lots of positive helpful people on here who know the struggle

 

[TheUltimateFixx]

I found plain bread and things like rice a bit to hard to swallow without throwing up but that could just be me being a wimp too

Your body will let you know what you can (literally) stomach. The rice is more for when you feel ready for some more solid food, after the worst bouts of sickness are over but your insides are still sensitive. At that point some diced potatos and carrots cooked in clear broth are also easy to digest and gentle on the stomach.

PS sometimes I've found a spoonful of sugar (as odd as that sounds) to be a quick fix for nausea, because it gets exacerbated by the sugar (and salt) imbalance that happens when you lose too much fluid. When you can't get electrolyte powder, flat soda (flat because the fizz irritates) accompanied by salty crackers is a tried-and-tested combo.

 

[endlessnameless]

Thanks again Nightraver,

I hope you can manage to get off / stay off there's nothing worse than being a slave, not only do you feel like shit in the morning but it really restricts your freedom and it's like having a hammer floating over your head.... one little thing goes wrong and you're sick and non-functioning without any way to explain, not to mention the financial / emotional costs.

It'll be 3 weeks for me on Monday, I've been working all this week, starting out half days and slowly working myself to full days, I'm tired and shaky by the time I leave but I'm getting faster at recovering after a lie down.

Honestly my biggest fear was that I wouldn't be able to function socially with customers & family but I managing that well.... I had very severe social anxiety and some depression when I was younger due to severe bullying in high school... opiates dulled that and I was able to take more risks & learn how to communicate & relate to people better, I also learned that as people get older they are not there to tease and belittle you.... (not to mention feeling awesome the whole time while doing it lol)

I do honestly still think opiates helped me learn how to function socially but the price was very high, maybe I would have gotten out of that funk naturally but I'm grateful to only have mild anxiety here and there now, it would have killed me eventually.

I'm going to slowly taper down my drinking (it's not like I'm drinking obscene amounts but it's still way too much to be healthy, 6-8 drinks a afternoon/night, not good I know) but I'm taking it one step at a time.

EDIT - Just a side note for a laugh, I was looking through my old posts and I was wrong about the 5 year thing, I've been dabbling for damn near 20 years and a slave for around 7, if anybody thinks it's too late... have a think about that.

Thanks for being a good dude / dude-ette

Hey there, I just wanted to first say that I'm delighted to hear you're recovering and that the withdrawals have begun fading away. I also wanted to say that I can relate and empathize with everything you've said in your post that I've included in my reply. So too did Opioids serve me positively in the sense that Heroin initially treated both my severely debilitating general anxiety disorder and major depressive disorder to the point where I was functioning significantly better than I was before I tried smoking it. I was able to relearn how to socially interact incredibly well with people and I was able to work again and go back to college (and graduate twice in two separate colleges) along with various other educational and employment-related achievements.

Should you ever find yourself in that situation again, then I highly recommend suggesting to your doctor that they prescribe you a course of Lyrica (pregabalin) for the initial two-week period. I'm taking 400mgs daily and I can honestly say it takes away at least 70% of the actual physical withdrawal symptoms. Another positive about Lyrica is that it happens to work quite well in regards to treating anxiety and it's neither a Benzo nor an opioid.

Sending all my support to you brother/sister, I look forward to your updates concerning your continued recovery.

 

[aphexia]

It really is appreciated all the support, thanks guys.

I was able to relearn how to socially interact incredibly well with people and I was able to work again and go back to college (and graduate twice in two separate colleges) along with various other educational and employment-related achievements.

It really is a double edged sword but there are far healthier ways to achieve this I'm sure and ones that don't leave you broke & sick

I don't consider myself out of the woodwork yet as I know what can happen, I've even been having little thoughts pop out of no-where thinking "damn, it sure would be nice right now" but I shut them down quickly and say to myself "what the fuck is wrong with you, no"

It's funny, we have Lyrica in the house along with multiple boxes of Oxy for my parents aches and pains, it's been kind of motivating through the worst knowing that I could walk 15 steps and make everything AOK but didn't, says a lot about how much you want to get off when the ride is over, that and I've never been able to screw over good people.

If anybody reads this and is thinking of giving up I'm happy to give what little advice or support I can, I've planned 3 cold turkeys and failed twice, both after getting through the worst of the acute symptoms... never had the strength to taper significantly

 

[endlessnameless]

Oh, I completely get you as regards those thoughts you mentioned, but yes, shut them the absolute fuck down and remember that all this is temporary. In a very short time, you will feel so good that you'll forget how bad it ever was.
Of course that in itself can be dangerous too, when you forget how bad and dark the withdrawals were. Just keep on going as you are and that's how you'll get out of all this.

Interestingly enough I've also been in the situation where there were opioids around while I was in withdrawals and I managed to get through them out of sheer force of Will. I'm sure that action was born from being in the knowledge that I could at any time find some relief if the cold turkey withdrawals got too much for me to handle.

I can see a lot of myself in what you post Aphexia. I can't screw people over either - my conscience would annihilate me.
Also - I love the profile pic. Red Alert: Command and Conquer eh? Used to play the shit out of that game for hours on end. I want to try and download it again, one of the best games ever.

 

[aphexia]

Red Alert: Command and Conquer eh? Used to play the shit out of that game for hours on end. I want to try and download it again, one of the best games ever.

Yep played the shit out of all of the C&C's back in the day right from the first when it came out... luckily I can't claim to be part of the Brotherhood of NOD anymore lol, Bluelight was a much different platform back then, the poor old low res image doesn't hold up anymore.

Mainly played on PC but the best fun was linking up Playstations for Red Alert on 2 tv's, we'd have the sound off until we got a Tanya in base, nothing worse than a loud "I'm there" - "Let's Rock" blaring from the other TV haha

 

[endlessnameless]

Yep played the shit out of all of the C&C's back in the day right from the first when it came out... luckily I can't claim to be part of the Brotherhood of NOD anymore lol, Bluelight was a much different platform back then, the poor old low res image doesn't hold up anymore.

Mainly played on PC but the best fun was linking up Playstations for Red Alert on 2 tv's, we'd have the sound off until we got a Tanya in base, nothing worse than a loud "I'm there" - "Let's Rock" blaring from the other TV haha

THE BROTHERHOOD OF NOD!! I was racking my brain in the small hours of the morning trying to think of that name. Aw man, so many great memories.

Yeah, I also played it on PC, never got it on PlayStation though. Wonder if I can get it on PS5

Certainly worth a try. My other favorite was Grim Fandango by Lucas Arts. Had that on PS5 for a while and on PC for years. Ever played that one?