Hi everyone,
I’ve been meaning to post about this situation I’m in for a long time now...
I’d REALLY love to hear back from anyone who has experienced anything like this or is going through something similar - this situation has become one of substantial worry for me due to how long it has lasted... and in this length of time I have speculated wildly as to the potential implications of what it could be.
For nearly 5 months now (since early August) I have been experiencing persistent sensations in the back, left side of my head. They began initially after doing 4 pills over the course of three nights. At first I described the feeling as a headache - though it very rarely is intense enough to describe as a pain. More of a dull, pressure or simply a strange, slightly unpleasant feeling that can range from the top of my neck, up to the rear-top of my head, always on the left side. The feeling is almost always to some extent there, though it does range in intensity from something I can pretty well completely ignore - to periods when it is intense enough that it is hard to focus on anything else - these times are when my mind tends to despairingly think about potential long-term damage that has resulted from my E use, that these feelings will never go away, and that I will never be the same.
In terms of my Ecstasy use up until the point when this all began... I started using E one year prior to this (August of 1998). Since then it could be described as reasonably heavy compared to many mild users, I realize it was probably too much now and regret taking it so lightly at times. I’m not sure of an exact number, but during that year I probably took between 60 - 100 pills in total. Typically 2 - 3 pills over the course of a night on any particular occasion.
When the ‘headaches’ began in early August I stopped taking E and didn’t again until the middle of September when I took 2 pills at Citrus here in Toronto. I get hopeful at times that they are going away as sometimes they won’t be bad for a day or so... I think before this party I felt this way, and partly wanted to test out whether taking E again would cause any impact. They didn’t worsen or get any better after that and I have not done any Ecstasy since.
After they had persisted for about 2 months I went to the doctor and was completely honest about my drug use. He said to wait another month, so I did. I went back at the end of November as nothing had improved and now am scheduled to have a CAT scan performed on January 23. He doubts whether we will find anything and doesn’t seem to think there is damage. I have done fairly significant amounts of research about E, and if what I am experiencing is due to the type of damage many people hypothesize E causes (to serotonin axon terminals) I doubt the damage is physically large enough to detect with a CAT scan.
One question I have not been able to establish a clear answer for is whether or not damage to serotonin axon terminals would be felt in the form of a physical sensation such as this. Aside from the moments of worry relating to possible implications of these feelings, I am not and have not experienced any depression that could be a sign of damage to the serotonin system.
I have searched many times on bluelight.ru and elsewhere for any postings or reports of similar experiences to mine and have found very few. One points out something similar but describes it as ‘brain freeze’ - which I related to immediately. In a certain sense it feels as though that part of my head has been anaesthetized. But they said the longest this has lasted for them was 3 1/2 weeks. One other posting mentioned a headache in the rear of their head while tripping on acid. I have done shrooms a couple times since this all began and find I can’t enjoy it because this feeling becomes exaggerated to the point where I can’t enjoy the trip.
If anyone know anything about what this might be, or can offer ANY insight into my situation whatsoever, I’d really love to hear back from you. Five months is a really long time to put up with this, especially when left hanging with basically no knowledge of what’s going on...
Thanks so much,
and I apologize greatly for the length of this posting!
I just felt I had to include everything that might seem important.
Oli Goldsmith
[email protected]
I’ve been meaning to post about this situation I’m in for a long time now...
I’d REALLY love to hear back from anyone who has experienced anything like this or is going through something similar - this situation has become one of substantial worry for me due to how long it has lasted... and in this length of time I have speculated wildly as to the potential implications of what it could be.
For nearly 5 months now (since early August) I have been experiencing persistent sensations in the back, left side of my head. They began initially after doing 4 pills over the course of three nights. At first I described the feeling as a headache - though it very rarely is intense enough to describe as a pain. More of a dull, pressure or simply a strange, slightly unpleasant feeling that can range from the top of my neck, up to the rear-top of my head, always on the left side. The feeling is almost always to some extent there, though it does range in intensity from something I can pretty well completely ignore - to periods when it is intense enough that it is hard to focus on anything else - these times are when my mind tends to despairingly think about potential long-term damage that has resulted from my E use, that these feelings will never go away, and that I will never be the same.
In terms of my Ecstasy use up until the point when this all began... I started using E one year prior to this (August of 1998). Since then it could be described as reasonably heavy compared to many mild users, I realize it was probably too much now and regret taking it so lightly at times. I’m not sure of an exact number, but during that year I probably took between 60 - 100 pills in total. Typically 2 - 3 pills over the course of a night on any particular occasion.
When the ‘headaches’ began in early August I stopped taking E and didn’t again until the middle of September when I took 2 pills at Citrus here in Toronto. I get hopeful at times that they are going away as sometimes they won’t be bad for a day or so... I think before this party I felt this way, and partly wanted to test out whether taking E again would cause any impact. They didn’t worsen or get any better after that and I have not done any Ecstasy since.
After they had persisted for about 2 months I went to the doctor and was completely honest about my drug use. He said to wait another month, so I did. I went back at the end of November as nothing had improved and now am scheduled to have a CAT scan performed on January 23. He doubts whether we will find anything and doesn’t seem to think there is damage. I have done fairly significant amounts of research about E, and if what I am experiencing is due to the type of damage many people hypothesize E causes (to serotonin axon terminals) I doubt the damage is physically large enough to detect with a CAT scan.
One question I have not been able to establish a clear answer for is whether or not damage to serotonin axon terminals would be felt in the form of a physical sensation such as this. Aside from the moments of worry relating to possible implications of these feelings, I am not and have not experienced any depression that could be a sign of damage to the serotonin system.
I have searched many times on bluelight.ru and elsewhere for any postings or reports of similar experiences to mine and have found very few. One points out something similar but describes it as ‘brain freeze’ - which I related to immediately. In a certain sense it feels as though that part of my head has been anaesthetized. But they said the longest this has lasted for them was 3 1/2 weeks. One other posting mentioned a headache in the rear of their head while tripping on acid. I have done shrooms a couple times since this all began and find I can’t enjoy it because this feeling becomes exaggerated to the point where I can’t enjoy the trip.
If anyone know anything about what this might be, or can offer ANY insight into my situation whatsoever, I’d really love to hear back from you. Five months is a really long time to put up with this, especially when left hanging with basically no knowledge of what’s going on...
Thanks so much,
and I apologize greatly for the length of this posting!
I just felt I had to include everything that might seem important.
Oli Goldsmith
[email protected]