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Can’t stop, but want to

A

althea16

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 15, 2023
Messages
50
I have come to realize that I will never quit these opioid pills until they are not around. I need to throw them away but cannot bring myself to do it. It’s a battle between the spirit and the flesh…and the flesh is clearly winning.
 
Yeah that's the only way to quit for me: to not have them around.

I have quit some insane opioid habits (380mg/day of methadone, IV heroin and fentanyl, etc.), and am free of active opioid addiction these days. But as soon as I get any supply of opioids beyond a single dose worth, including mild opioids like kratom, I will take them until they are gone.
 
Im the other way round i need heroin and pod with me otherwise i get a mental head fuck and go get some then use.

If you want to quit there are a lot of comfert meds that help its staying of thats the hard part
 
althea16 said:
I have come to realize that I will never quit these opioid pills until they are not around. I need to throw them away but cannot bring myself to do it. It’s a battle between the spirit and the flesh…and the flesh is clearly winning.
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I had to drive myself thousands of miles away from all the heroin dealers I knew. Twice. But eventually it worked.

And yes, I came to the same realization many years ago. If there are drugs in my proximity, sure as the sun will rise the next day, I will do them until they are gone... and no force on earth or the heavens will stop that from happening, apart from death.

They call it a disease for a reason.
 
Snafu in the Void said:
I had to drive myself thousands of miles away from all the heroin dealers I knew. Twice. But eventually it worked.

And yes, I came to the same realization many years ago. If there are drugs in my proximity, sure as the sun will rise the next day, I will do them until they are gone... and no force on earth or the heavens will stop that from happening.

They call it a disease for a reason.
Click to expand...
So true i tried but my best mate my heroin dealer he wont sell to me by seeing him nod is so tempting
 
Pm me where you live I'll break in one day and do it for you "act of God style". I'll even take your TV, we good like that
 
I moved 1700 miles away and told my dealers I got popped so even when I came to visit they were to scared to deal with me.

Boom
 
yubacity said:
Im the other way round i need heroin and pod with me otherwise i get a mental head fuck and go get some then use.
Click to expand...

In a sense that is the real way to quit: while you still have some supply on you. Otherwise you really just ran out (rather than truly quiting by exercising willpower and self-control and stopping while you still have some). I did this once when I finally tapered off of methadone. I was at a clinic with a very generous take home policy and would only go once a month. I tapered down from 380mg a day (38 10mg pills) to zero over a year or so, but never told them I was tapering. So by the time i quit i wound up with thousands of pills. I didn't touch those pills for something like 5 years, and then eventually used them all.

I believe that is the only time I've quit like that. In all other cases I had to consume the entire supply before quiting. Even these days with opioids I don't intend on consuming quickly, I end consuming them daily till their gone. For instance, i might get something like a few grams of o-desmethyltramadol that I intend on just having around and using occasionally, but end up consuming it all on consecutive days till it's gone. Burns a hole in my pocket so to speak.
 
negrogesic said:
In a sense that is the real way to quit: while you still have some supply on you. Otherwise you really just ran out (rather than truly quiting by exercising willpower and self-control and stopping while you still have some). I did this once when I finally tapered off of methadone. I was at a clinic with a very generous take home policy and would only go once a month. I tapered down from 380mg a day (38 10mg pills) to zero over a year or so, but never told them I was tapering. So by the time i quit i wound up with thousands of pills. I didn't touch those pills for something like 5 years, and then eventually used them all.

I believe that is the only time I've quit like that. In all other cases I had to consume the entire supply before quiting. Even these days with opioids I don't intend on consuming quickly, I end consuming them daily till their gone. For instance, i might get something like a few grams of o-desmethyltramadol that I intend on just having around and using occasionally, but end up consuming it all on consecutive days till it's gone. Burns a hole in my pocket so to speak.
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WE ARE addicts we always have a plan how we be sane with it but dont happen i am prescribed 600 mg pregabs a day but i get a few thousand sent fr0om india i go through the so quick but the plan is a max 1200 mg a day .

I have to have heroin and pods with during wds even first try i had none i drove me mad on third day i got some then you use . But when i have drug suppy in my room it stops the head fuck to know they there calms me
 
I have to say I’m fully in the “if o haven’t quit it w some on me, I’ve just separated geographically, not truly made a decision not to use it” I ALWAYS keep whatever I am quitting on me.
I realized a while ago - no matter how far you go there is dope even in the smallest town.
 
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