gypsiejunkie
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Aug 17, 2013
- Messages
- 119
on a monday
we had been fighting.
i went outside
and rummaged around
the front porch until
i found a box
with some girl's clothes (too small for me)
and some clothes my size.
i grabbed a slightly oversized
sweater that said
"brunch squad"
and a debit card
with carrie's name on it
(not the carrie i know).
a nobody
(hannah roberts)
is from the small town
of auburn, kansas.
she was raised in a
chaotic household
with a mentally ill mother
and a drug addicted father
this teen mom
writes with shocking clarity
about the art
of balancing
being a deadbeat mother
unconscionable
selfish
junkie.
(her words)
i am not
a person
to these people
you are not a person
to them.
they watch you
the same way they watch
law and order
svu
and intervention.
they talk to you
as they keep an eye
on their keys
and their wallets
they don't ask
any of the right questions,
they nod at things
they couldn't possibly understand
and they write notes
with the experience
you gained
any given year of grade school.
so what can you do?
what does anyone do?
after a meth binge
that leaves you questioning
what you are capable of
exactly
and what is god-
is god even there?
and when they said
unconditional
did they
really
truly
mean
it?
i take a selfie
in mystery carries
slightly oversized
sweater
that says
"brunch squad”
and caption it
"mainlining wine coolers like"
and post it on instagram
because no one believes me
when i say it's bad
and no one believes me
until it's way too late
because
all the other mothers
at the halloween party
are in their forties,
people have abortions
instead of get married at seventeen,
people go through
their first divorce
before they have their first kid
and they all
have a cousin
with a problem
somewhere.
once i had a bad day
and i woke up
ten years later.
so follow me on instagram
hannahisnthereanymore
we had been fighting.
i went outside
and rummaged around
the front porch until
i found a box
with some girl's clothes (too small for me)
and some clothes my size.
i grabbed a slightly oversized
sweater that said
"brunch squad"
and a debit card
with carrie's name on it
(not the carrie i know).
a nobody
(hannah roberts)
is from the small town
of auburn, kansas.
she was raised in a
chaotic household
with a mentally ill mother
and a drug addicted father
this teen mom
writes with shocking clarity
about the art
of balancing
being a deadbeat mother
unconscionable
selfish
junkie.
(her words)
i am not
a person
to these people
you are not a person
to them.
they watch you
the same way they watch
law and order
svu
and intervention.
they talk to you
as they keep an eye
on their keys
and their wallets
they don't ask
any of the right questions,
they nod at things
they couldn't possibly understand
and they write notes
with the experience
you gained
any given year of grade school.
so what can you do?
what does anyone do?
after a meth binge
that leaves you questioning
what you are capable of
exactly
and what is god-
is god even there?
and when they said
unconditional
did they
really
truly
mean
it?
i take a selfie
in mystery carries
slightly oversized
sweater
that says
"brunch squad”
and caption it
"mainlining wine coolers like"
and post it on instagram
because no one believes me
when i say it's bad
and no one believes me
until it's way too late
because
all the other mothers
at the halloween party
are in their forties,
people have abortions
instead of get married at seventeen,
people go through
their first divorce
before they have their first kid
and they all
have a cousin
with a problem
somewhere.
once i had a bad day
and i woke up
ten years later.
so follow me on instagram
hannahisnthereanymore
