no, what will actually happen is, you will ruin the one chance your kid has for life
breakup then pregnant help
- Thread starter Axefaxer7
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no, what will actually happen is, you will ruin the one chance your kid has for life
Trying to coerce someone into staying into a relationship they do not want and having a child they do not want is disgusting. And bribing her with sweets, really? It's plain that you know little about life and less about women. Go troll somewhere else.
OP, you have your whole life ahead of you. You will have other loves, and you have plenty of time to have children if you do decide that's what you want.
Ds
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Hey I see a lot of homeless teenagers eat here, and disapear into the night. We kind of hear rumors that the teens here are unwanted pregnancies, and both their parents are either to fucked up here at the shelter to even relise their kids exist or their parents are in jail. A lot of them could possibly be dead. They hardly talk to any of us except want a cigarette, and leave as quickly as they got there.
Its sad, I wouldn't put the shit i witness and have to go through each day on anybody, because it truly is a life changing experience what i'm going through.
Well, what the OP can do is this. Ask your self 'what can i do to be a better father for my child'? There can be a million answers to that, only you know what needs to be done, and if you forget just ask yourself that same very question again.
Its sad, I wouldn't put the shit i witness and have to go through each day on anybody, because it truly is a life changing experience what i'm going through.
Well, what the OP can do is this. Ask your self 'what can i do to be a better father for my child'? There can be a million answers to that, only you know what needs to be done, and if you forget just ask yourself that same very question again.
Apathiest , im not trolling , im try to save a childs life,,, so back of,,, and picking on the sweets is ridiculous, its convenient how you leave out the rest of the make up plan, So do me a favour and dont get me started on anything "ghoulish"
OP
So to sum up, you have to understand what she feels you have done wrong and then change your behavior so she doesnt feel this way ever again
But as there is a life or death time limit going on here, your going to have to truly promise to change.
If you dont feel she or your child is worth changing for, then sod it,, just take the advise of most of the people on this thread,
But do let us know how you get on, I truly wish the three of you the best of all possible luck in the world,
OP
Her not being able to make up her mind ,shows she still sees the Good side of the relationship
Here we see she has finished the relaionship while in a rage, and we all know we say and do things we regret while over come with Anger
Heres the reason for finishing it,, and its somthing that CAN be fixed,
This is obviously not the best way to interpret , what she feels you have done wrongAxefaxer7;13368318 said:
So to sum up, you have to understand what she feels you have done wrong and then change your behavior so she doesnt feel this way ever again
But as there is a life or death time limit going on here, your going to have to truly promise to change.
If you dont feel she or your child is worth changing for, then sod it,, just take the advise of most of the people on this thread,
But do let us know how you get on, I truly wish the three of you the best of all possible luck in the world,
Raising kids is hard, even when you're well into adulthood and have a partner who's committed to you and to the child 100%. If you're just starting out in life yourself and the relationship is over, it's going to be exponentially harder. And sweet talk and promises won't fix a relationship that's stopped working. OP's ex has told him how she feels and it's neither respectful nor realistic to try and talk her out of that.
spacejunk
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Stu, this person is asking for serious perspective and advice.
You've made your obsessive prejudice against women's right to choose well known already.
As this forum is about harm reduction, most of us are interested in providing compassionate, open-minded information - based on our experiences and knowledge.
Your lecturing diatribes have no place here, i would suggest you learn how to show some respect in discussing these sensitive matters of keep them to your self.
How dare you tell people what they should do in this situation?
You don't know the OP - none of us do.
As for the pregnant ex-girlfriend? She's got autonomy over her own body, as she damn well should have in a civilised society.
Trolls don't last very long around here.
You've made your obsessive prejudice against women's right to choose well known already.
As this forum is about harm reduction, most of us are interested in providing compassionate, open-minded information - based on our experiences and knowledge.
Your lecturing diatribes have no place here, i would suggest you learn how to show some respect in discussing these sensitive matters of keep them to your self.
How dare you tell people what they should do in this situation?
You don't know the OP - none of us do.
As for the pregnant ex-girlfriend? She's got autonomy over her own body, as she damn well should have in a civilised society.
Trolls don't last very long around here.
My wife had our first Child at 17 and i was 18, he is 23 now and is still sitting right next to me ,I wouldnt have it any other way, when i look back on what was so hard about the baby / toddler years, and yes they are the hardest, Its purely the time that we have to give up for ourselfs and give to the child, This isnt a problem for the first few months because your filled with joy that you have this amazing new gift, and your willing to sacrafice anything for them, its only after the repetitiveness of 24 hour care kicks in that you realize, you dont have the freedom of choice you used to have, well tough shit, sure you cant go out and party as much, and you cant choose how long you have to sleep, one of you has to bust their arse and bring in the cash, there aint no time to spend together as a family, baby doesnt really do much apart from feed sleep cry and crap. but then you hit 3-4 months and you see that first smile, then 5-6 months and you get a laugh, 8-9 months your sure he just said his first word, before you know it hes walking around , picking things up and giving massive cuddles. , once you get over freaking out that you cant do any of the things you used to, you realize theres a millon better things to do right here.
Now could everybody stop being such baby haters, its really starting to piss me off
How many kids have you got Apathiest, if you dont mind me asking ?
Now could everybody stop being such baby haters, its really starting to piss me off
How many kids have you got Apathiest, if you dont mind me asking ?
Oh thats cute.. you pretty much told him to go pay to have his baby killed, un fuckin believable,
spacejunk
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It is not his body to make the decision about; he is referring to his former girlfriend.
And again, a foetus is not a baby.
Educate yourself if you wish to discuss this in a mature fashion.
If not, you're trolling and essentially harassing anyone that even mentions terminating a pregnancy.
And again, a foetus is not a baby.
Educate yourself if you wish to discuss this in a mature fashion.
If not, you're trolling and essentially harassing anyone that even mentions terminating a pregnancy.
Soulgasm
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It's just a little jizz that got on an egg dude chill the fuck out. It's obviously not a healthy relationship or a good environment to bring a kid into. Prospective parents should wait until they're fully ready and capable to bring life into the world or shit gets all fucked up.
Im chilled. infact i think this is my last post on this subject.
just a bit of jizz on an egg, did make me laugh, but you should really check out exactly what that jizz has to go through just to get to that egg, its pretty fuckin amazing,
Spacejunk
I do understand what your saying. I do see that calling a foetus a baby can cause offence.
Lets say i was to call a seed a seedling , or an Egg a Chick, with these comparisons your reasoning would be completely correct, A seed is not a seedling, and an Egg is not a Chick
But lets say that seed was Germinated and was in a pot of warm moist soil and was sprouting its first root. then could i call it a seedling? , yes I think i could.
Lets say the egg was in a nest with mother hen sitting on it, keeping it warm. and if i was to hold it up to the light and able to make out the shape of a tiny chick, then could i call it a chick,, well yes i think i could,
What i couldnt do is call a human female Egg or a Human male sperm a baby, we are in agreement there
But lets say the sperm had fertilized the egg and was growing in the womb and i was to take an ultrasound scanner and see a tiny shape resembling a baby.I think i could safely call that a baby, and since you are talking about foetuses well they do have arms legs bodys and heads, so yeah.. im calling that a baby.
you can call it what ever you want..
And sure. its not his body. but it is his baby.
ok ive nearly had enough of this now, im gona move onto , some type of creation over Evolution Argument .if anyones up for that ? or im going to attempt to Explain and achive Unconditional Love for all Humanity , thats gona be tricky one though, it starts of with never blaming anyone for anything, all experiances are lessons and when you strip away the bullshit, we are all exactly the same.
just a bit of jizz on an egg, did make me laugh, but you should really check out exactly what that jizz has to go through just to get to that egg, its pretty fuckin amazing,
Spacejunk
I do understand what your saying. I do see that calling a foetus a baby can cause offence.
Lets say i was to call a seed a seedling , or an Egg a Chick, with these comparisons your reasoning would be completely correct, A seed is not a seedling, and an Egg is not a Chick
But lets say that seed was Germinated and was in a pot of warm moist soil and was sprouting its first root. then could i call it a seedling? , yes I think i could.
Lets say the egg was in a nest with mother hen sitting on it, keeping it warm. and if i was to hold it up to the light and able to make out the shape of a tiny chick, then could i call it a chick,, well yes i think i could,
What i couldnt do is call a human female Egg or a Human male sperm a baby, we are in agreement there
But lets say the sperm had fertilized the egg and was growing in the womb and i was to take an ultrasound scanner and see a tiny shape resembling a baby.I think i could safely call that a baby, and since you are talking about foetuses well they do have arms legs bodys and heads, so yeah.. im calling that a baby.
you can call it what ever you want..
And sure. its not his body. but it is his baby.
ok ive nearly had enough of this now, im gona move onto , some type of creation over Evolution Argument .if anyones up for that ? or im going to attempt to Explain and achive Unconditional Love for all Humanity , thats gona be tricky one though, it starts of with never blaming anyone for anything, all experiances are lessons and when you strip away the bullshit, we are all exactly the same.
placid space
Bluelighter
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Its not that easy but I think think its easier for women to end the relationship(not abortion). Its funny since theyre generally more emotional but because of that theyre also stronger usually. While men, dont allow themselves to feel as much and generally dont want to get settled down. Just instinct. So when they do let themselves feel IMO its much more difficult and traumatic for a guy and why women usually seem to walk away easily from a relationship.
Regarding the abortion, its such a touchy subject. I had a friend who was about that age and they had an abortion with his gf. IT was very traumatic for her and hurt her, was depressed after. I havent talked to her about it after but I think she'll never be completely ok with it. I cannot imagine being in that position, must be awful. I would only suggest to be there for her, whatever is the decision, it doesnt matter whether you are together or not as a couple. Be mature, be there for her, she will need support.
much luv lilthumbs 
nekointheclouds
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People rent baby haters they just have the right to CHOOSE how and when that baby happens. Most pro choicers are thinking of whats honestly best for the babies as well as for themselves. There is no shortage of people of already born children with no families on this earth right now and the human population is climbing at rates that are frightening as it is. To not have the choice of when to bring a child into the world would ultimately be disastrous for the human race and the planet.
BigWolf
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Second. If you're on these forums there's already something wrong with you ?. Which is probably why everyone here has some input, because most of us have been through that. When you live YOUR life at a certain pace and speed, and you bring in certain aspects into YOUR life that arise for health problems, legal problems, and flat out moral fuckin' problems, you just need to realize you're bringing that into a defenseless third party's life.
Happened to me. I thought for years I was somehow going to get punished for being with this girl and the decision being she got an abortion. I thought I was going to be legitimately punished for this, probably because of some subconscious anti-planned-parenthood propaganda I heard somewhere.
Looking back, it was hard. However, I wasn't given punishment for not bringing a child into a world that I knew I would be wrong and selfish for doing. Knowing I'm capable of better, but settling for who I was at the time... And deciding not to settle? To instead better myself? Until the time came where I met someone I cared about enough to make sure I'm not hurting myself with my lifestyle, because it would hurt her more, and THEN having a child. No that's not punishment.
Punishment would have been a 36-year-old father, looking back sixteen years on the day of his daughters birth, and hating himself for being a coked-up juiced-up and piss poor excuse for a guardian, and protector of his child. That's punishment bud. I've seen enough of that shit that it's one mistake I didn't make.
Go live in south Florida, west palm beach, and see how many stories are exactly like you just described. Watch what happens to the people around you for no less than five years. And when at five years is done, you make a clear assessment of all those people....
99% chance you'll say "fuck, I'm really glad I didn't do that to a child. I would have been helpless."