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Boyfriend addicted to cocaine I need help

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Dingo8MyBaby

Greenlighter
Joined
Jan 22, 2020
Messages
8
Hey guys, this is my first time ever posting on a forum, but I honestly don’t know what to do. My boyfriend is a heavy cocaine user, he is usually high 4-5 days a week, most of them are nonstop binges. He has been able to go up to 10 grams in 2 days by himself. When he finally decides to stop, (either the drugs are gone or he’s done so much it doesn’t have any affect anymore), he crashes for days, sometimes 3 days at a time. He sweats through all his clothes and bedding, so much so that he has to change tshirts multiple times and the bed is so wet that I can’t sleep in it. During this, he is completely bedridden; tossing and turning, crying out in his sleep as if he’s in pain, hallucinating, all the while trying to mend his already destroyed nose. This time, I have told him that I will not take care of this self inflicted pain anymore. I sit for days to wait for him to sober up only to have to care for him beck and call as he is recovering. However this time, in addition to the following symptoms I have listed above, he also has a slight fever of 101 and diarrhea. I have looked online and saw fever and diarrhea aren’t listed as characteristics of cocaine withdrawal. He is claiming that he has the flu. I would feel horrible if I completely ignored his pain and he was genuinely ill. Can anyone give their thoughts on this?
 
Im no expert but withdrawal from a stimulant should not induce a fever or diarrhea response. I would think the opposite constipation.
 
And by the way, you better not allow him to continue to use. My ex gf looked the other way and I ended up in rehab and almost dead due to opiates.
 
Thanks Greenlighter. I have never told anyone abt this problem so u responding has made me feel better. I have tried and tried to get him to stop but it’s pretty much impossible to reason with someone who is coked up all the time. This time I was actually very threatened and scared of his reaction. So this is it, if it’s a result of his binging then it’s over.
 
Dingo8MyBaby said:
I was actually very threatened and scared of his reaction
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Dingo8MyBaby said:
I have also offered to go to rehab with him but he vehemently refused. I am a pussy for staying with this guy bc he also uses my money to pay for the coke.
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Based on what you've said, there's no reason at all to be around him.
 
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Dingo8MyBaby said:
Hey guys, this is my first time ever posting on a forum, but I honestly don’t know what to do. My boyfriend is a heavy cocaine user, he is usually high 4-5 days a week, most of them are nonstop binges. He has been able to go up to 10 grams in 2 days by himself. When he finally decides to stop, (either the drugs are gone or he’s done so much it doesn’t have any affect anymore), he crashes for days, sometimes 3 days at a time. He sweats through all his clothes and bedding, so much so that he has to change tshirts multiple times and the bed is so wet that I can’t sleep in it. During this, he is completely bedridden; tossing and turning, crying out in his sleep as if he’s in pain, hallucinating, all the while trying to mend his already destroyed nose. This time, I have told him that I will not take care of this self inflicted pain anymore. I sit for days to wait for him to sober up only to have to care for him beck and call as he is recovering. However this time, in addition to the following symptoms I have listed above, he also has a slight fever of 101 and diarrhea. I have looked online and saw fever and diarrhea aren’t listed as characteristics of cocaine withdrawal. He is claiming that he has the flu. I would feel horrible if I completely ignored his pain and he was genuinely ill. Can anyone give their thoughts on this?
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Sorry for your troubles. Your friend may require hospitalization.

- Cocaine withdrawal symptoms may include night sweats, weakness, clammy skin, nausea and stomach pain.
- The side effects of chronic cocaine use can be similar to the symptoms of flu: runny nose, aches, pains, headache, fuzzy head, etc.
- Cocaine use can reduce blood flow to the major digestive organs, resulting in severe abdominal pain, chronic diarrhea, and systemic infection.

I urge you to seek immediate medical attention for your friend.
 
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Dingo8MyBaby said:
I have also offered to go to rehab with him but he vehemently refused. I am a pussy for staying with this guy bc he also uses my money to pay for the coke.
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If that isn't the epitome of enabling I don't know what is. Why would you allow this?
 
Mgold55 said:
And by the way, you better not allow him to continue to use. My ex gf looked the other way and I ended up in rehab and almost dead due to opiates.
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its not really up to her or your girlfriend for that matter. This post reeks of a lack of accountability. You wound up in rehab and almost dead because of choices you made.

OP: you need to put the impetus on your boyfriend to change. Remove the nursing. Be there for him emotionally, let him know you love and care for him but thatyou will no longer make the rollercoaster ride any easier.

my girl gave me an ultimatum after I was a heavy opiate addict for 14 years. She said she would care for our son for a week while I did what I needed to do to detox. If after that I pissed hot, she would leave. Sounds harsh but it worked. I’ve been clean for 2+ years now and I owe it to her “tough love”.

we may not all respond the same but it’s worth a shot.
 
I'm so sorry for you. I don't want to end up being this girlfriend. I've been seeing this guy for 5mos. He told me right out the gate that he does cocaine. I was kind of shocked that he was so open about it. Who would tell someone they just met & interested in dating that they do cocaine. That did explain alot of his weird behavior. When we went on our 1st date he stayed going to the restroom but he didn't seem high at the time just frequent bathroom trips. He did however look spooked. A few months passed he became like Dr.Jekyll and Mr.Hyde. His personality would be up and down.The mood swings! I thought he was crazy. He would be spazzing out,talking so much he wouldn't shut up & he had these weird ass movements in his legs & he couldn't sit still at times. Something always was moving. It got on my nerves. He couldn't remember anything. He would always complain about being sick. He sniffed CONSTANTLY like he had a cold. He would complain of stomach pains along with black runny stools. He claims he didn't have a problem but I told him he did. That weird ass jaw movement in his sleep like he was grinding his teeth was terrible to watch. Sex was nonexistent. He couldn't get it up half the time or it wouldn't stay up. I couldn't take seeing him like that anymore so I left. He has so much potential and alot going for himself. He has his own business,house, & cars doing well. He's self destructing & dosen't realize it. Well maybe he does. He did admit that he was doing too much of it. He would hallucinate often he said. I started observing him more. He would get high before work at work & after work every day. He would stay home on his off days and do dope by himself he didn't want me around because he picked up on me noticing things. I don't want to be with someone who does drugs. It's kind of scary. He drinks alot also and doing Xanax. I feel bad for leaving him I couldn't take it anymore!
 
i've been severely addicted to crack- would be up for days, then sleep for days. like so deeply my mum tried to wake me and couldn't and had to sit and watch in case is topped breathing cos she thought i was dying. i did not have a fever or diarrhea.

stop paying for his drugs!!! honestly there is not a point when he'll have had enough. his habit will get worse and worse, and with it his health. how would you feel if he had a heart attack or something on drugs you'd paid for? honestly i think you need to reevaluate your relationship with this guy. someone using the way you describe cares about no one at that time, fuck i didn't even care when my dad got cancer!
 
14YearsOfFlux said:
its not really up to her or your girlfriend for that matter. This post reeks of a lack of accountability. You wound up in rehab and almost dead because of choices you made.

OP: you need to put the impetus on your boyfriend to change. Remove the nursing. Be there for him emotionally, let him know you love and care for him but thatyou will no longer make the rollercoaster ride any easier.

my girl gave me an ultimatum after I was a heavy opiate addict for 14 years. She said she would care for our son for a week while I did what I needed to do to detox. If after that I pissed hot, she would leave. Sounds harsh but it worked. I’ve been clean for 2+ years now and I owe it to her “tough love”.

we may not all respond the same but it’s worth a shot.
[ll
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Traumatic said:
I'm so sorry for you. I don't want to end up being this girlfriend. I've been seeing this guy for 5mos. He told me right out the gate that he does cocaine. I was kind of shocked that he was so open about it. Who would tell someone they just met & interested in dating that they do cocaine. That did explain alot of his weird behavior. When we went on our 1st date he stayed going to the restroom but he didn't seem high at the time just frequent bathroom trips. He did however look spooked. A few months passed he became like Dr.Jekyll and Mr.Hyde. His personality would be up and down.The mood swings! I thought he was crazy. He would be spazzing out,talking so much he wouldn't shut up & he had these weird ass movements in his legs & he couldn't sit still at times. Something always was moving. It got on my nerves. He couldn't remember anything. He would always complain about being sick. He sniffed CONSTANTLY like he had a cold. He would complain of stomach pains along with black runny stools. He claims he didn't have a problem but I told him he did. That weird ass jaw movement in his sleep like he was grinding his teeth was terrible to watch. Sex was nonexistent. He couldn't get it up half the time or it wouldn't stay up. I couldn't take seeing him like that anymore so I left. He has so much potential and alot going for himself. He has his own business,house, & cars doing well. He's self destructing & dosen't realize it. Well maybe he does. He did admit that he was doing too much of it. He would hallucinate often he said. I started observing him more. He would get high before work at work & after work every day. He would stay home on his off days and do dope by himself he didn't want me around because he picked up on me noticing things. I don't want to be with someone who does drugs. It's kind of scary. He drinks alot also and doing Xanax. I feel bad for leaving him I couldn't take it anymore!
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hey so I feel like u are still in the position to leave him before he ruins ur life. I should have left when I saw the screaming warning signs u are seeing now. Pls girl. Don’t be dumb like me.
 
chinup said:
i've been severely addicted to crack- would be up for days, then sleep for days. like so deeply my mum tried to wake me and couldn't and had to sit and watch in case is topped breathing cos she thought i was dying. i did not have a fever or diarrhea.

stop paying for his drugs!!! honestly there is not a point when he'll have had enough. his habit will get worse and worse, and with it his health. how would you feel if he had a heart attack or something on drugs you'd paid for? honestly i think you need to reevaluate your relationship with this guy. someone using the way you describe cares about no one at that time, fuck i didn't even care when my dad got cancer!
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I don’t offer him the money of course. We share a bank account and he takes with out me knowing.
 
Dingo8MyBaby said:
hey so I feel like u are still in the position to leave him before he ruins ur life. I should have left when I saw the screaming warning signs u are seeing now. Pls girl. Don’t be dumb like me.
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Oo I see now that u did leave. Proud of u.
 
Black stools or black vomit is a really big alarm bell. His stomach could be bleeding. He should get checked out.
 
He is likely sick. He's been abusing high-potency stimulants for a long time and it is possible it has done organ damage, he should be checked out by a doctor if you can arrange that.
 
geekgrl said:
Black stools or black vomit is a really big alarm bell. His stomach could be bleeding. He should get checked out.
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Where did you guys read that? Must've been deleted or I'm just blind.

Either way yeah, that can be the sign of potentially serious things like internal bleeding and organ damage.
 
Girl you gotta leave and now go back to him till he gets out of rehab. Good luck. I am an attic too and I still say leave him Soon after he is well enough to hear you say good bye
 
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