BDSM and stimulants

[MoreAlkaloidsPLZ]

Keep those cards and letters coming kinky people. I know you are out there and I promise not to judge.

Nothing spectacular or entertaining really, and most of it not even kinky. More "real life" personal issues. Stuff like passionately french kissing my lover right after he smoked a cigarette for instance (grew up among chain smokers and have a bit of a trauma in that regard). Or completely stopping to worry about my looks when playing.

I can definitely relate. When already extremely uninhibited as a base line, losing the majority of the remaining inhibitions seems more profound somehow. Hard to roll up your sleeves when they are tattooed on.

Yeah, I'm always treading carefully there. Which is a shame because nobody daring to talk about it makes it so much harder to expand the circle of friends you can play with that way. There are a couple of groups on fetlife dedicated to the subject of drugs and kink which is great, but then again most of those people aren't anywhere near us. Still dreaming about holding a "Party'n'Play" workshop at one of our local gatherings, but I'm way too worried about my reputation (I'm a pro domme but don't use substances with clients), let alone legal consequences.

This speaks to the crux of why prohibition is problematic in general and the core philosophy of bluelight itself. The idea that if we make basic animal behaviors that are unavoidable in humans forbidden (seeking to alter one's consciousness for example) there can be no grand discussion. There is no way to regulate forbidden behavior and therefore reduce harm. The freedom to discuss such openly offers a tremendous opportunity for exploration and understanding. I have noticed a number of reports indicating the propensity for people who otherwise might not have an interest in kink at all to start cross-dressing and doing anal play etc behind stimulant use. I suspect that despite the lack of information available online and despite the fact that in bdsm community circles this basically isn't being discussed other then as a thing "you just don't do" this type of thing happens quite a bit with seasoned kinksters. (Oh to be a fly on those walls.) Anecdotal evidence to confirm my suspicion continues to mount. (If I were an academic, I'd likely do my thesis on it.) I'm always eager to hear and learn more. Thank you for being so forthright. Please allow me to pick your brain further if you don't mind:

Does any particular experience with a drug combo stand out? Did it have a tactile effect as well as psychological? You spoke of GHB and coke. I've never combined the two and only seen ghb a couple of times a decade ago or so. Having had some interesting experiences myself with n20 and k that I suspect are similar, I am curious to know more.

So Domina by trade eh? Sounds like fun. How long have you been at that? Is it a satisfying career? Lucrative? How do you overcome the lack of intimacy that surely must arise when playing with someone you don't find attractive? I'd just love to hear more anecdote from you about your experiences in that trade. As well as this topic in general regardless of how it relates to chemically induced altered states of consciousness..

 

[SpaceSquirrel]

I have noticed a number of reports indicating the propensity for people who otherwise might not have an interest in kink at all to start cross-dressing and doing anal play etc behind stimulant use. I suspect that despite the lack of information available online and despite the fact that in bdsm community circles this basically isn't being discussed other then as a thing "you just don't do" this type of thing happens quite a bit with seasoned kinksters. (Oh to be a fly on those walls.) Anecdotal evidence to confirm my suspicion continues to mount.

Well, I do know a couple of cross-dressers who like to combine stims and anal play, but I wouldn't know if that's a trend (or much of their personal history for that matter).

Does any particular experience with a drug combo stand out? Did it have a tactile effect as well as psychological? You spoke of GHB and coke. I've never combined the two and only seen ghb a couple of times a decade ago or so. Having had some interesting experiences myself with n20 and k that I suspect are similar, I am curious to know more.

It's not like I tried each and everything. LSD or shrooms make me feel too weird to be sexual most of the time. Weed is hit or miss. 2CB reliably turns me vanilla which always confuses the hell out of me (I know friends who have the same problem and other's who definitely don't). Coke and speed do for me what you described. GHB is dose dependent, the more I take the more I just want to be used in every which way. Top space isn't impossible, but harder than usual. Both GHB and MDMA are super tactile for me. Also very oral, can't get enough of kissing, licking, biting, rimming, oral sex. A combo of GHB and coke or speed is the most versatile kink enhancer for me so far, with GHB and coke being the most euphoric. Also easier to get some sleep later, speed keeps me awake forever.

I've been burned by ketamine the first time I tried it. Asked for edge play and got it - IV ketamine for almost an hour, resulting in a continuous k-hole, with some mindfuck added. I thought I was about to die the whole time and took months to recover. Haven't felt the need to repeat that since. Although I do know quite a few people who really seem to enjoy k and kink.

What are your favourites for play?

So Domina by trade eh? Sounds like fun. How long have you been at that? Is it a satisfying career? Lucrative?

About 15 years full time, although I've done other kinds of sex work prior (and still sometimes do). I can't complain really, I like my job and it pays the bills.

How do you overcome the lack of intimacy that surely must arise when playing with someone you don't find attractive?

Define intimacy, define attractiveness. I don't need to find a client physically attractive in order to play (or even sleep) with them, they just shouldn't annoy me too much. Often intimacy with a pro is one sided with the client opening up emotionally way more than I do. But I like people, I like making people happy, I take pride in my skills and I'm genuinely fascinated by the huge diversity of sexual quirks. With some clients I wonder if they really do pay me enough to put up with them, some I decide to not see again. Some are fun and sexy and I wonder who should pay whom. I know that a lot of people can't wrap their head around it and I understand that, but for me sex work is really a pretty ordinary job. And no, it's never changed my view on men, or women for that matter (I do have female clients, too) or hindered my capability to have deeply intimate, private romantic relationships. They need to be non-monogamous obviously, but then I've always been a swinger, too.

 

[MoreAlkaloidsPLZ]

It's not like I tried each and everything. LSD or shrooms make me feel too weird to be sexual most of the time. Weed is hit or miss. 2CB reliably turns me vanilla which always confuses the hell out of me (I know friends who have the same problem and other's who definitely don't). Coke and speed do for me what you described. GHB is dose dependent, the more I take the more I just want to be used in every which way. Top space isn't impossible, but harder than usual. Both GHB and MDMA are super tactile for me. Also very oral, can't get enough of kissing, licking, biting, rimming, oral sex. A combo of GHB and coke or speed is the most versatile kink enhancer for me so far, with GHB and coke being the most euphoric. Also easier to get some sleep later, speed keeps me awake forever.

Heh, the last time I did GHB I blacked out and woke up hours later, face down in my driveway. I think I may have took too much. Never really had a reliable source for it though and it never occurred to me to mix it with coke.

I've been burned by ketamine the first time I tried it. Asked for edge play and got it - IV ketamine for almost an hour, resulting in a continuous k-hole, with some mindfuck added. I thought I was about to die the whole time and took months to recover. Haven't felt the need to repeat that since. Although I do know quite a few people who really seem to enjoy k and kink.

Everytime I do enough k to fall in a hole I get the feeling of imminent demise. To be honest it's an odd kind of serenity to me and I enjoy it. My thought process being like "Yeah this is a good way to go out. I'm ready." Then I sober up enough to realize what's happening and have a sad at being out of the psychedelic doom tunnel. I'm not sure if that's unusual or what. But I seldom use k that way. Usually just bump enough to have moderate psychedelic effects which is a whole other ball of wax..

What are your favourites for play?

70% coke and 30% ketamine all mixed up is just lovely and I suspect is quite similar to what you describe from the ghb coke model. Also a big fan of Nitrous plus (whatever). Adderal + Sativa is a favorite. I love MDxx but can't do it very often or no love. I really dig that false euphoria and peaceful acceptance of others. I'm usually not super lovey dovey towards humans so I dig that alot and using it too often feels like a big waste. I'm that rare critter that can be neck deep in serotonin love dump and get more sadistic then I am sober. I haven't run across too many others who get that. Most seem to lose their taste for cruelty when the love kicks in. Acid and shrooms are also big favorites. I enjoy acid more but it just takes so long for my perception to become unjacked. Gotta keep a clear head. Got a lot of important calculations to make and whatnot. If someone asks me what my drug of choice is my answer is whaddayagot?

About 15 years full time, although I've done other kinds of sex work prior (and still sometimes do). I can't complain really, I like my job and it pays the bills.

They say if you can find a job you love then you will never work a day in your life. Of course whoever said that has probably never spent 2 hours cleaning off used dildos and trying to get blood stains out of their favorite leather hat eh? Safety first.

Define intimacy, define attractiveness. I don't need to find a client physically attractive in order to play (or even sleep) with them, they just shouldn't annoy me too much. Often intimacy with a pro is one sided with the client opening up emotionally way more than I do. But I like people, I like making people happy, I take pride in my skills and I'm genuinely fascinated by the huge diversity of sexual quirks. With some clients I wonder if they really do pay me enough to put up with them, some I decide to not see again. Some are fun and sexy and I wonder who should pay whom. I know that a lot of people can't wrap their head around it and I understand that, but for me sex work is really a pretty ordinary job. And no, it's never changed my view on men, or women for that matter (I do have female clients, too) or hindered my capability to have deeply intimate, private romantic relationships. They need to be non-monogamous obviously, but then I've always been a swinger, too.

I guess for me sadism and masochism are my primary interests and the way I do it in either case requires a relatively in depth understanding of and or from the subject I am interacting with. I only like to edge and it's dangerous business doing the stuff I do with someone unless you have some pretty deep understanding of how their psyche works and vice versa. Programming, deprogramming, hypnotism, pain threshold expansion, induced psychosis, dehumanization etc. I am not sure how I could do that sort of thing casually and I can't get into it if I am not sapiosexually attracted to that person. I could half ass it and spank them or whatever but there is no way I'm gonna get inside their head unless I have taken some time to understand the landscape who's door I am kicking in. That takes time, trust and attraction with some measure of depth. I'm not sure I could do what I do with any real gusto if it was for business purposes. But that's just me. Still sounds like a fun job.

 

[SpaceSquirrel]

Heh, the last time I did GHB I blacked out and woke up hours later, face down in my driveway. I think I may have took too much. Never really had a reliable source for it though and it never occurred to me to mix it with coke.

Sounds like too much indeed. I prefer pharma GHB for its consistency although it's hard to score and more expensive, and dosing with a syringe. Once you figured out your perfect dose and re-dosing regimen for different activities it stays fairly consistant. Stims will keep you awake and more alert even with an overdose, but once the stims wear off you can still fall asleep unexpectedly. I've been recommended to dose GHB by timer rather than feeling, stuck to that and so far never G-ed out unless I planned it that way.

Everytime I do enough k to fall in a hole I get the feeling of imminent demise. To be honest it's an odd kind of serenity to me and I enjoy it. My thought process being like "Yeah this is a good way to go out. I'm ready." Then I sober up enough to realize what's happening and have a sad at being out of the psychedelic doom tunnel. I'm not sure if that's unusual or what.

Dunno how common it is, but I've heard it before. And I really thought I'd enjoy that and was somewhat disappointed that I didn't.

I'm that rare critter that can be neck deep in serotonin love dump and get more sadistic then I am sober. I haven't run across too many others who get that. Most seem to lose their taste for cruelty when the love kicks in.

I know a few people who can be sadistic on MDMA if they will it but not more than usual I don't think? Hm, I guess there are more field studies in order.

If someone asks me what my drug of choice is my answer is whaddayagot?

I see ...

I'm not sure I could do what I do with any real gusto if it was for business purposes. But that's just me. Still sounds like a fun job.

I have a couple of clients I do pretty severe edge play with. Some I've known for years. I've also had some pretty deep and awesome encounters with clients the first time we met. But probably 95% of the stuff I do at work is well within the immediate comfort zones of my clients (and mine anyway), nothing to unhinge them and nothing for me to worry about. Which is a good thing because as much as I enjoy unhinging people that's nothing I could do every day five days a week. Then again most people who visit kink pros do so because it's a mild itch they only feel like scratching every couple of weeks or months. Those who prefer to delve in deep usually get involved in the private scene and find play partners there.

 

[MoreAlkaloidsPLZ]

Sounds like too much indeed. I prefer pharma GHB for its consistency although it's hard to score and more expensive, and dosing with a syringe. Once you figured out your perfect dose and re-dosing regimen for different activities it stays fairly consistant. Stims will keep you awake and more alert even with an overdose, but once the stims wear off you can still fall asleep unexpectedly. I've been recommended to dose GHB by timer rather than feeling, stuck to that and so far never G-ed out unless I planned it that way.



Dunno how common it is, but I've heard it before. And I really thought I'd enjoy that and was somewhat disappointed that I didn't.



I know a few people who can be sadistic on MDMA if they will it but not more than usual I don't think? Hm, I guess there are more field studies in order.



I see ...



I have a couple of clients I do pretty severe edge play with. Some I've known for years. I've also had some pretty deep and awesome encounters with clients the first time we met. But probably 95% of the stuff I do at work is well within the immediate comfort zones of my clients (and mine anyway), nothing to unhinge them and nothing for me to worry about. Which is a good thing because as much as I enjoy unhinging people that's nothing I could do every day five days a week. Then again most people who visit kink pros do so because it's a mild itch they only feel like scratching every couple of weeks or months. Those who prefer to delve in deep usually get involved in the private scene and find play partners there.

Yes, field studies. For science!


Just an added thought. Ketamine is the only substance I have run across that toggles so easily back and forth from analgesic to psychedelic to anesthetic. (with some curious blurred lines along the way) It's a really weird drug. The doom tunnel/k-hole thing only happens in high doses for me (I've never used it iv) I typically prefer doing bumps intranasally in small doses taken rapidly. Say 3-4 bumps 15 to 20 mins apart totalling say .04ish mg per hour gives a VERY different experience then falling in a hole or the mild analgesic. It's definitely bdsm friendly as a bottom for me and as long as I don't do too much too fast it doesn't screw with my coordination badly enough to stop me from being able to top effectively either.

I have also noticed that when mixed with coke it pretty much completely eliminates the geeked out weirdness that I don't like about coke while leaving the euphoric yummy aspects intact. In fact I doubt I'll ever touch coke again unless it's mixed up with k.


Thank you for your detailed and thoughtful responses. This is EXACTLY the type of interaction I was looking for on the topic.

 

[SpaceSquirrel]

Thank you for your detailed and thoughtful responses. This is EXACTLY the type of interaction I was looking for on the topic.

My pleasure. I wouldn't mind a few more people chiming in either.

 

[MoreAlkaloidsPLZ]

Yes indeed, let's hope some others chime in with postcards from the edge..

 

[BornAgainYogi]

Never had a true bdsm experience but I did get into a train with this one chick. I had a warm tingly sensation I like the thought of a submissive little kitty at my beck and call maybe I'll get into one day

 

[PriestTheyCalledHim]

Never had a true bdsm experience but I did get into a train with this one chick. I had a warm tingly sensation I like the thought of a submissive little kitty at my beck and call maybe I'll get into one day

When you say you "got into a train with this one chick" what does that mean?

Does that mean the woman got gang banged by you and multiple men? Or did you and the woman get gang banged by other men?

Or does it mean you and a woman had sex while riding a train?

 

[BornAgainYogi]

The woman got gang banged.

 

[PriestTheyCalledHim]

The woman got gang banged.

Was this a GF? Or a random woman you met at a sex party or orgy?

 

[Clitnhawk]

Nothing like a good orgy to brighten the mood...

 

[take2rawcocksnass]

I watched 4 guys cum in Mt wife while 4 more shoved coke in my ass and on their cocks while they came in my ass and mouth

 

[take2rawcocksnass]

Awesome

 

[MoreAlkaloidsPLZ]

That's pretty hardcore. How did you manage to set that up? Do you think the cocaine enhanced the experience? What did it feel like mentally? What feedback did your wife give afterwards? Was she using cocaine as well?

 

[MuseEPDBluesRepeat]

Stimsand extreme sexual experiences go hand in hand wonderfully. I recall buying a 12 inch double ended dildo for me and my wife to fuck our asses at the same time while on a 3 ay Ethylphenidate binge. The same drug also facilitated me anal fisting my wife in a tent at a music festival.

Stims lend themselves very much to pushing holes to their limit using whatever object available at the time while your S.O is gagged

 

[motiv311]

this will all lead to no good