Avoiding disaster with Valium

[neandertroll]

Yep almost never, you got keep increasing the dose , there are better drugs for anxiety/depression but they take weeks work and don't give you the nice high , but high will stop soon and people left with an habit and even worse anxiety.

 

[Jnowhere]

Haha, I hate the caged rat feeling of cocaine and other stimulants so bad but occasionally forget and get my hands on some and then although it makes me feel like shit just keep doing it and doing it until it is gone and more often than not end up flushing my stash because I just can't trust myself not to do it if it's around.

Benzo's, on the other hand make me feel great, make me feel like myself, the one who has the power to put anybody at ease, to make anybody smile, etc, instead of the one that's to wrapped up inside my own head to even know how to talk to people.

I am a long time user of benzo's and may not be able to ever stop using. Almost 7 years. I take 10mg Valium 3 times a day
I feel nothing, it is to get off Ativan(lorazepam) which is what I was on until a few months ago, 2mg x 3 times a day. Ativan much stronger, shorter acting and supposedly less problem when mixed with opiods. Taking them long term is a nightmare if you run out. Could kill a long term user. My intake is limited by only using what is prescribed to me and the sheer terror of running out before I can refill the script keeps my use in check. The problem is that long term use of maximum normal dose has affected my brain and would take about a year to 18 months to get off them at this point. But the horrible anxiety, OCD, and constant sadness are controlled. They are a blessing and a curse. I maybe a lifer with benzos, I might be non functional without them, but taking them so long has me unable to safely quit unless, A very long slow, medically supervised taper.

 

[searchingforthesound]

Yep almost never, you got keep increasing the dose , there are better drugs for anxiety/depression but they take weeks work and don't give you the nice high , but high will stop soon and people left with an habit and even worse anxiety.

Yeah, That's what I figured. I could see that happening to myself. Seems like a miracle drug at first and then you just keep wanting more until you literally need it.

You knows it man. Starting to sound like it would just be better for you to flush your stash and forget the taper.

It will be a bit uncomfortable. The more benzo you take, the inevitable end-result discomfort will increase

Longterm benzo works well for an extremely small % of people, and is diasastrous for the rest

I know you're right. But I couldn't bring myself to flush them. I think any other drug I would have been able to flush.

I've gone 2 days now without taking any benzos. Got through yesterday and most of today with no problem. Some significant rebound anxiety and depression just hit me at the end of the work day. Discomfort and craving for sure, but I don't think any wds.

I've got almost 15 mg left reserved for emergency use. I'm anticipating an especially stressful day at work tomorrow. I'm prepared to take 2 mg tomorrow to get me through if I feel I need it. Then take Saturday on Sunday off, and maybe 1.5 mg to get through what will be an extremely stressful day on Monday.

Thank you all for the help and support you've given me so far. I would definitely have convinced myself to get more thinking I could continue taking 10 to 20 mg a day for another month and easily stop at that point, had I not heard from some of you.

 

[Jnowhere]

What are you taking?

 

[searchingforthesound]

What are you taking?

Kratom. I've had a problem with that in the past, but it was exponentially easier for me to stop than it was to stop taking Valium after only a few weeks of daily use. It's helping me get through for now while the benzos leave my system.

 

[middleman]

Kratom. I've had a problem with that in the past, but it was exponentially easier for me to stop than it was to stop taking Valium after only a few weeks of daily use. It's helping me get through for now while the benzos leave my system.

How are you doing? I hope all is well. Remember, I'm here for you if you need someone to talk to or help.

 

[searchingforthesound]

How are you doing? I hope all is well. Remember, I'm here for you if you need someone to talk to or help.

Thank you for checking up on me. I may send you a PM later when I get a chance.

If I make it through today without taking either Valium or kratom it will be the first since it's stupid experiment began.

It's been hard to stay away. But I am going to one way or another. This darkness got to give

 

[Opana313]

I think you are on the right track and know subconsciously which direction you need to go.
This is sort of like my pill addiction(opioids, BUT I love ne some benzos). I get all high and figure this is what I need to be the best person in this time in my life. I can go back and forth with myself or at least for me, I just have to lay it all down straight to stop the mind games(either it being fuck it and fuck this these feelings, this drug will still be around in the future, so fuck it I'm done. As soon as I make this connection in my brain it instantly gets easier with day to day work & home life. Usually all in high til I die or fuck it I can't have it so I must allow myself to be free
(For example: a long binge (30s will only last a week or maybe only a weekend)on 30mg oxycodone(d.o.c.), 10-30 10mg Vicodin, a few 10mg/15mg oxy, possibly even 10-20 tramadol, a handful of alprazolam bars, klonopin, maybe a few stimulants(not my jam honestly, unless we talking ecstacy(my highschool sweetheart) a couple 10mg addy/vivanse or even snorting wellbutrin(total fiend move, not desirable at all; usually if I'm doing this or any stim it is because I am trying not to re-dose my opioids or get through a shit WD/taper day)----this is all a part of the bender..now, when I run out of the opies or getting low enough of course comes the impending doom but this back and forth addiction for 15+ years, I was scared to go to the deep end and try subs (although I've fucked with methadone for fun here and there many times) suboxone always terrified me bc of how long it takes to get through that withdrawal, but about 1.5/2 yrs roughly I have started taking 1mg to 4mg of subs and it definitely improved my well being and addiction over all but I just use it as a band aid until next re-up of whatever opioid. The subs make it 10000× easier as I have basically made my mind up about my addiction but also I continue to use, BUT when switching to the subs after a 30mg roxi binge up to 120mg daily is when my mind really starts to fuck with me, I'll be in a shit mood with mild WD or possibly zero WD but numbed out zombie from subs, this is where I have to say FUCK IT, STOP CHASING because although I am financially or maybe connect is tapped out, my mind will still chase, SO once I make that connection of fuck it.It's over, and it will come again soon enough..
This is addiction my friend. I have had my fun with bars and valium, nowadays they are strictly for the purpose of chilling out, melting away a migraine or stress from WD. If I only use benzos and use them strongly, I simply become a dizzy forgetful klutz and then even worse shit happens, like not being able to wake up for work on time(fuck not again) or a car accident..I realized fast that most of my real problems came from having/using too many benzos. So now I allow myself to use benzos for therapeutic purposes only.

I just feel that it's important for everyone to recognize that you have the ability to free your mind from the chains of something that not only helps you but on the other hand destroys you. To allow yourself to make this or that decision and to create a better balance for your own life and peace of mind.

These things(valium) are delicious and we are all human..but you know like I do, that if I had a monthly script(or more) they would be popped like chicklets..and this is not fun and the end result will be even more consequences.

I think you can go back to going without but if swim wants to swim then by all means do it with a high level of discretion. Which you already were back when you first made this thread, and this is good to see.

 

[searchingforthesound]

Made it through a day without any substances. Going for 2. Minor wds, but see light at the end of the tunnel.

 

[elgoucho9]

Made it through a day without any substances. Going for 2. Minor wds, but see light at the end of the tunnel.

You're doing absolutely brilliant with this man. Keep it up. Keep us all updated. We are all here for you.

I would expect a ropey couple of days now most likely. But in 3 days time it should begin to get better.

 

[Loquacious]

An acquaintance has struggled with social anxiety is entire life. As a result, has no clothes connections at the moment and deals with loneliness all the time.

A couple of weeks ago, he acquired 30 10 mg Valiums. I think he spent a few days being an idiot and taking 30 mg a day basically knocks out on the couch and not remember much.

At that point he realized that taking 10 mg was absolutely perfect and put him in the mindset where it was super easy to be himself, strike up. Interesting conversations with interesting people, become way more effective as a leader at work, get dates with attractive women, and basically get rid of whatever was blocking him from sharing his gifts with the world.

Homeboy has been taking the valium's daily, realizing that's not a good long-term strategy, and makes a plan to lay off the Valium except for one sore twice a week when he feels like he needs the extra help to perform in life.

That first day without after taking them daily for 2 weeks didn't go so well. Felt some withdrawals or whatever and took a 5 mg to make it go away. Now he's worried that He's going to be in for a hard time when the 60 mg he has left runs out, and common sense is telling him to taper what he has left and not get more.

What do you think homeboy is in for? He's only taken the damn things for a short period of time, though a larger dose than would have been prudent.

How much hell should he prepare himself for? And what's his best bet for getting through it? I guess it was stupid for him to think that a drug that made him think so clearly and communicate so easily was going to help him finally create a happy life

I had multiple 3 month clonazoLAM benders and was fine after a week of tiny doses every time.
Mind this was on top of booze and stims.

Felt fine jumping off.

I think youll be fine, benzos are serious, but not as serious as some other sites make it out to be. (Short term use at least)

 

[middleman]

I had multiple 3 month clonazoLAM benders and was fine after a week of tiny doses every time.
Mind this was on top of booze and stims.

Felt fine jumping off.

I think youll be fine, benzos are serious, but not as serious as some other sites make it out to be. (Short term use at least)

I think OP is still in the clear. He should go cold turkey, flush, sell the rest of his stash, or save them for a rainy day. In my opinion, he should not have too much of a physical dependency.

Is it going to suck when he stops taking them? Yes, it will; however, he should bite the bullet now. One month of humble benzo abuse should be a walk in the park. He will not regret stopping now; self-medicating can only last for so long until it feels like you're in a bottomless pit. Trust me, OP, it will only get darker from here.

Feel free to add me on Discord. I messaged you here a few days ago with my contact; if you don't have one, give me another form of contact or don't. Cheers, mate, you got this.

 

[searchingforthesound]

I think OP is still in the clear. He should go cold turkey, flush, sell the rest of his stash, or save them for a rainy day. In my opinion, he should not have too much of a physical dependency.

Is it going to suck when he stops taking them? Yes, it will; however, he should bite the bullet now. One month of humble benzo abuse should be a walk in the park. He will not regret stopping now; self-medicating can only last for so long until it feels like you're in a bottomless pit. Trust me, OP, it will only get darker from here.

Feel free to add me on Discord. I messaged you here a few days ago with my contact; if you don't have one, give me another form of contact or don't. Cheers, mate, you got this.

Thank you. It's like you can tell what is in my head. I did medicate on Tuesday with 2 mg and then yesterday was the first day that I didn't really think about it. I'd considered medicating again today with a slightly smaller amount, but am going to hold off because you're right. I will not regret stopping now.

Side note: kratom sucks and was unhelpful in easing off the meds. Things are better now that the kratom has been eliminated.

 

[ageingpartyfiend]

keep going mate, getting off these benzo's now is the best decision you will ever make

 

[Loquacious]

Op im doing this together with you, i am not getting wd symptoms for whatever reason and feel fine. Im scared shitless for seizures but i honestly feel sober and recovered. My skin doesn’t even burn this time around and i havent had benzos since Monday night.

Ive had grams of rc benzos

 

[searchingforthesound]

Op im doing this together with you, i am not getting wd symptoms for whatever reason and feel fine. Im scared shitless for seizures but i honestly feel sober and recovered. My skin doesn’t even burn this time around and i havent had benzos since Monday night.

Ive had grams of rc benzos

Awesome to hear! Keep up the great work!

I thought I'd be able to make it through the day but got crippling (must be rebound ) anxiety at work. Took about 1.5 mg. At least it is less than I took the last time, and it's been over a week since I took it on 2 consecutive days. And have taken it only 3 of the past 8 days.

Tomorrow is a new day. I think I'll survive tomorrow with 0 mg, but damn these cravings. I wonder how many consecutive days without it is going to take until the satisfaction of being drug free outweighs the urge to relieve the symptoms that the drug itself has caused.

 

[Loquacious]

Same. My fpam arrived like 4 hrs after the first signs of muscle fuckery started kicking in.

Mentally i feel fine to drop it completely but fuck seizures i live alone and it’s far from seizure friendly.

I wonder if 2mg/day fPam will preload me for a smooth entrance back to complete sobriety.

This week was a good week, i havent felt like myself for years. Mfw the benzos are having paradoxical effects and making me depressed and lazy(past year or two tbh) but the memoryfuckery made me forget my taper plans constantly. Pyraz is go good for sobering up tho in retrospect.

So that’s what, like 4 days cold turkey after 2 weeks of pyraz. This means im so so close. Might need to get some non benzo anti epileptic so im not afraid to jump off.
Longest time off rc benzos since 2020, barely had Rx benzos, seeing how 25 1mg flualps cost lest than a pack of cigarettes.


I honestly don’t know if i did good or bad this week.


/rambling

 

[searchingforthesound]

Same. My fpam arrived like 4 hrs after the first signs of muscle fuckery started kicking in.

Mentally i feel fine to drop it completely but fuck seizures i live alone and it’s far from seizure friendly.

I wonder if 2mg/day fPam will preload me for a smooth entrance back to complete sobriety.

This week was a good week, i havent felt like myself for years. Mfw the benzos are having paradoxical effects and making me depressed and lazy(past year or two tbh) but the memoryfuckery made me forget my taper plans constantly. Pyraz is go good for sobering up tho in retrospect.

So that’s what, like 4 days cold turkey after 2 weeks of pyraz. This means im so so close. Might need to get some non benzo anti epileptic so im not afraid to jump off.
Longest time off rc benzos since 2020, barely had Rx benzos, seeing how 25 1mg flualps cost lest than a pack of cigarettes.


I honestly don’t know if i did good or bad this week.


/rambling

I know others here have a lot more knowledge about how to withdraw safely and what you should do to avoid seizures than I do. But making it into the 5th day cold turkey seems pretty good to me! How are you feeling now? Stay safe!

I had a bit of craving and anxiety earlier, but manageable. Drank some kava and it helped a lot more than I expected. I don't expect to break down and be tempted to take benzos again, but tomorrow is another day.

 

[Loquacious]

Took 24mg fpam and holy fuck my tolly was gone. Mfw it all kicked in during groceries and i was stumbling. Should’ve stuck to 8 tbh.

stuck my finger in a dusty 3-meo-pce bag without thinking. Comfy disso. A couple of beer and i stupidly forgot i took my dexamp.

Today was a shit day and i hate that apparently triggers fuck it mode.

funny how it isnt even reducing anxiety that much, more a very familiar dumb sloppy feeling.

I hope the fucked memory helps to suppress cravings, i would feel so bad if i eventually succeeded just to throw it all away again.

Sorry for my egocentric rant, i hope you’ll be in the clear soon no matter a small setback it’s still v minor. Bouncing back to myself after the first month long stints took like a week max and I could drink without issue right after.