I can't tell if I'm suffering from Depersonalization. I was heavily emotionally abused as a child. I know I suffer from depression, anhedonia and anxiety, but i've been unable to tell if I have DP. That doesn't mean I don't though because I couldn't tell I was depressed when I was an early teen. The reason i'm not sure is because I match up perfectly with some symptoms, and others I don't even have slightly.
I feel as though i'm observing my thoughts and my life, almost like it's a game (feels like this more than a movie to me). Things that should worry me, like being in debt, just aren't. However, I do not feel detached from my body, just my mind. All of my body feels real to me, and this seems to be a major indication of DP, but I don't have this symptom. I do not feel in control of my speech or movements, and my words seem to be slurred a lot. My emotions are fairly numb, however I do feel them, its just not the same as it used to be. I feel like I'm on auto pilot every day, I try my best to make the day go by as fast as possible so I can just sleep. My memories feel distant and strange, and I have very few of them. My short term memory doesn't exist, and it didn't exist before I began smoking pot.
Another reason i'm unsure is because I do not feel as though the world isn't real, which is another major symptom (derealization). The world feels real, I just feel disconnected from it, and myself. I feel like i'm just existing, basically.
My doctor is shit and can't tell if i'm suffering from it. Either way it controls my life.
Another thing I should mention is that looking in the mirror scares me, I try not to do it because I feel like i'm looking at a dead body.
I feel as though i'm observing my thoughts and my life, almost like it's a game (feels like this more than a movie to me). Things that should worry me, like being in debt, just aren't. However, I do not feel detached from my body, just my mind. All of my body feels real to me, and this seems to be a major indication of DP, but I don't have this symptom. I do not feel in control of my speech or movements, and my words seem to be slurred a lot. My emotions are fairly numb, however I do feel them, its just not the same as it used to be. I feel like I'm on auto pilot every day, I try my best to make the day go by as fast as possible so I can just sleep. My memories feel distant and strange, and I have very few of them. My short term memory doesn't exist, and it didn't exist before I began smoking pot.
Another reason i'm unsure is because I do not feel as though the world isn't real, which is another major symptom (derealization). The world feels real, I just feel disconnected from it, and myself. I feel like i'm just existing, basically.
My doctor is shit and can't tell if i'm suffering from it. Either way it controls my life.
Another thing I should mention is that looking in the mirror scares me, I try not to do it because I feel like i'm looking at a dead body.