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Health Am I just permanently tripping and suppressing it?

moonyham

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Joined
Feb 15, 2007
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2,809
I've done a fair bit of psychedelics. Some intense trips that are monstrous in size(mushrooms specifically for the crazy doses) but mescaline and lately acid has been in the mix.

Well I've had closed eye visuals for years. Like, it's hard to remember exactly when it started but if I had to guess it was probably my mega dose of shrooms. Unknown weight exactly but by volume, about a large grapefruit sized ball of dense very strong dried shrooms. Using lemon tek method. Was literally tripping within minutes of drinking it and time dilated what felt like centuries or thousands of years. It was extreme.

Anyway it doesn't really bother me as such but when I close my eyes in the dark I sometimes have full fractal hallucinations, spiraling staircases turning into fireworks sort of stuff. Sometimes it's quite faint. Sometimes it's quite intense and almost distracting. I can almost control its intensity if I focus which I find a bit odd.

This definitely didn't exist before I did psycheldics. I warn anyone I know who hasn't done them that this happened to me after a very large dose but I'm not aware of it being common so think the risk is minimal.

After this strong trip(And a couple other strong but not monstrous doses) I had rainbow halos around every street light for months. Friends I did trips with from the same tea - same dose and shrooms as me, told me they didn't have the rainbow halo effect when I asked them a few weeks after the trip.

This example is important because that friend, a close friend who is very honest with me, had done all the same doses as each other. We both got into psychedelics together around 16 years old. For the most part we both had similar drug consumption but I ended up with lasting rainbow halos and he didn't.

Anyway I was wondering what people thought about this. What are peoples experiences? Is this normal? Are the few people I've tripped with just an exception? How long have you had rainbow halos or other effects on lighting/vision after consuming psychedelics?


One possibility I've considered is that tripping unlocked my minds ability to create images in my head while sober. Not that I'm still tripping as such or have any remnants of drug in me but that my mind learned to do stuff and it now does it.

This would kind of add up with the fact that these drugs *surely* break down fast enough there is no way any is left after months or years(I've had multi year breaks, still got CEV). I don't know enough about this half life mumbo jumbo but on the surface it seems that the drugs cannot still be in me doing stuff after such a period of time.

I do smoke weed which certainly potentiates it. But I do have these visuals regardless. If I smoke some real strong weed after a few days or week long break, and lie in a dark room it's like taking a small dose of shrooms or acid basically. Is weed just psychedelic for me and none of this shit is related to mushrooms, cacti, lsd etc. I did smoke weed before that mega dose though and didn't get these visuals. I feel it's more potentiating it than anything but I could be wrong. I can't remember if I was having these visuals when I had a 3 month break a couple years ago.

Anyway look forward to your comments.
 
This is definitely normal, not necessarily common by percentage but common in the sense that it happens to lots of people all the time. They have a condition label for this, HPPD or Hallucinogen Persisting Perception Disorder, although that is usually saved for when the lasting visual effects are considered to be detrimental to one's life. If they don't bother you, it just is what it is basically. I haven't checked up on the research in recent times but based on anecdotal evidence, it definitely seems like some people are just sensitive to having this happen and others are not; you happen to be one of the ones who is, like me, so welcome to the club. I can't tell you with any certainty what your personal experience will be, but for me and most others I've known to have this happen, smoking cannabis definitely seems to potentiate the visual effects, a lot, as it does when smoking it while actually tripping. If it bothers you, I'd recommend looking up some resources online for HPPD and possibly talking to a doctor about it if you feel like you might want to take something to help bring the visuals down while sober, I know I've read about some people being prescribed different depressant medications trying to even out the lasting neural hyperactivity. If it doesn't bother you, just know it's really not abnormal, just something that happens to some of us. I've had it going on for many years and just learned to ignore it while not on drugs, and don't consider it to impact my sober life.
 
This is definitely normal, not necessarily common by percentage but common in the sense that it happens to lots of people all the time. They have a condition label for this, HPPD or Hallucinogen Persisting Perception Disorder, although that is usually saved for when the lasting visual effects are considered to be detrimental to one's life. If they don't bother you, it just is what it is basically. I haven't checked up on the research in recent times but based on anecdotal evidence, it definitely seems like some people are just sensitive to having this happen and others are not; you happen to be one of the ones who is, like me, so welcome to the club. I can't tell you with any certainty what your personal experience will be, but for me and most others I've known to have this happen, smoking cannabis definitely seems to potentiate the visual effects, a lot, as it does when smoking it while actually tripping. If it bothers you, I'd recommend looking up some resources online for HPPD and possibly talking to a doctor about it if you feel like you might want to take something to help bring the visuals down while sober, I know I've read about some people being prescribed different depressant medications trying to even out the lasting neural hyperactivity. If it doesn't bother you, just know it's really not abnormal, just something that happens to some of us. I've had it going on for many years and just learned to ignore it while not on drugs, and don't consider it to impact my sober life.
Thanks this is a great reply and explains a lot. I'll look into hppd, I remember seeing it mentioned here years ago but didn't make the connection.

Personally yeah it doesn't really bother me I just wanted to know more about it. Overall it's positive as it's never been a negative but I've certainly enjoyed it on occasion especially when it's quite intense like after a weed break etc.

I guess every time I've thought about this I kinda question if its not just the CEV but I am in fact having a mild trip all the time. I just don't even realize it because it's been literally 10 years or so. How would I even know. If the visuals are there why wouldn't the rest of the effects be happening too sort of thing. I've certainly been different since I did my hard trips. I like who I became, certainly more gentle and empathetic. But this could also the effect of a perpetual trip haha.
 
No problem, happy to help.

Yeah, when it first happened to me I just thought of it like free tripping. After a while I started to worry I had damaged my brain but it just seemed to be anxiety as I eventually worked beyond it and haven't considered it an issue since. That was like a decade ago now and I haven't thought about it in a problematic sense since then.

It's very possible that it's just something to do with the visual cortex or something and may be entirely disconnected from the non-visual aspects of tripping on a fundamental level, although I understand how it can at the least make you recall the headspace nonetheless. But I mean, I think we're all having a mild trip all the time, that's just the human condition and perhaps those of us who have taken lots of drugs become hyperaware of it. The pathways in your brain that are stimulated by psychedelics don't turn off when the drug leaves your body, they just drop down to baseline levels of activity, and presumably still contribute to consciousness in lesser but comparable ways at that point.

I'm fried too though so you probably can't determine anything conclusively from just my opinion lol.
 
I never actually had closed eye visuals when i stopped taking acid after 8 years...a slight highlighting of colour.What i did notice at nightime was when i moved my hand i would see trails..and fingers catching up to hand.At first it was really annoying until i kinda got used to it....probably lasted like 10 years and slowly dissapeared....these days nothing.Always wondered if it would escalate into a full blown trip ...but it never happened.
 
I have this as well for several years now. I consider it unlocked ability. It's pretty interesting, can be quite entertaining especially the CEVs.

Although distinct from psychosis, it also seems to share some similarities with it, although I'm not sure how much. I originally developed this during psychedelic induced psychosis. The psychosis faded but the CEVs stayed with me for years.

It does seem to be slowly fading with time for me. Sort of a bittersweet goodbye.
 
No problem, happy to help.

Yeah, when it first happened to me I just thought of it like free tripping. After a while I started to worry I had damaged my brain but it just seemed to be anxiety as I eventually worked beyond it and haven't considered it an issue since. That was like a decade ago now and I haven't thought about it in a problematic sense since then.

It's very possible that it's just something to do with the visual cortex or something and may be entirely disconnected from the non-visual aspects of tripping on a fundamental level, although I understand how it can at the least make you recall the headspace nonetheless. But I mean, I think we're all having a mild trip all the time, that's just the human condition and perhaps those of us who have taken lots of drugs become hyperaware of it. The pathways in your brain that are stimulated by psychedelics don't turn off when the drug leaves your body, they just drop down to baseline levels of activity, and presumably still contribute to consciousness in lesser but comparable ways at that point.

I'm fried too though so you probably can't determine anything conclusively from just my opinion lol.

Hah, 'im fried too though'. Love it. 'Look at these two perma tripping dudes trying to figure out if they are actually permatripping or not lol'.

I like the idea on the visual cortex, your right it could be unrelated to the rest of the effects. Im inclined to agree that we are all tripping anyway and your line of thinking there. But yeah like you say, we are.. effected. Hard to really say, and no way to prove I guess.
 
Greater than 50 years LSD use. Generally ~300 ug every 3 months or so. Daily cannabis and coffee, occasional alcohol.

I have occasional OEVs that are extremely vivid and that connot be ignored. Bright colors constructing geometric shapes that cover the center 1/3 of my field of vision. They generally last anywhere from 30 seconds to 15 minutes. CEV's are strong anytime I smoke cannabis. I take this as a gift and enjoy.
 
I have this as well for several years now. I consider it unlocked ability. It's pretty interesting, can be quite entertaining especially the CEVs.

Although distinct from psychosis, it also seems to share some similarities with it, although I'm not sure how much. I originally developed this during psychedelic induced psychosis. The psychosis faded but the CEVs stayed with me for years.

It does seem to be slowly fading with time for me. Sort of a bittersweet goodbye.
I never actually had closed eye visuals when i stopped taking acid after 8 years...a slight highlighting of colour.What i did notice at nightime was when i moved my hand i would see trails..and fingers catching up to hand.At first it was really annoying until i kinda got used to it....probably lasted like 10 years and slowly dissapeared....these days nothing.Always wondered if it would escalate into a full blown trip ...but it never happened.


Yeah I get pretty intense 'trails' on cigarette embers in the dark. Glowsticks at night etc.. they all look like I have low shutter speed. Doing psychedelics, even other types seems to reinvigorate this whole phenomena for me. Do you still trip?
 
Yeah I get pretty intense 'trails' on cigarette embers in the dark. Glowsticks at night etc.. they all look like I have low shutter speed. Doing psychedelics, even other types seems to reinvigorate this whole phenomena for me. Do you still trip?
Yep. I used to get the auras as well.

I tripped a couple dozen more times after that psychosis, but took a break. I haven't dosed in 1.5 years.

I don't want to say I'm retired, but have no plans to trip again any time soon.

I saw everything I wanted to see, I guess you could say.
 
I have minor "visuals" while sober. Overall the sober state has become a bit more psychedelic. It flows in a more natural, interactive way. Everything feels dynamic and alive and interconnected rather than a stale backdrop to my depressive ruminations. I think psychedelics can help and have helped me, but are not necessary for this process. It's like a veil being lifted, like being awake for real. Like being aligned properly somehow and not spending life in some weird accidental in-between state perpetuated by the pitfalls of modern lifestyles. I'm not sure if i can separate it from growing up and leaving adolescent angst behind, to be fair. Anyway the slight swirliness is all positive for me.
 
Greater than 50 years LSD use. Generally ~300 ug every 3 months or so. Daily cannabis and coffee, occasional alcohol.

I have occasional OEVs that are extremely vivid and that connot be ignored. Bright colors constructing geometric shapes that cover the center 1/3 of my field of vision. They generally last anywhere from 30 seconds to 15 minutes. CEV's are strong anytime I smoke cannabis. I take this as a gift and enjoy.

Gotta ask, do you use dose you’ve obtained many moons ago or you still got some connects after all these years? Either way I find it impressive. That’s one thing I’m striving for, to still be well connected in my scene even when I get much older.

-GC
 
I have feathered rainbow lights on micro+mini-dose days, but with cannabis daily lately, I shift into visual noise and patterns and pareidolia from coloured fluctuations quite often but I like it and am not at all upset about it. It feels like a bit extra, and not tiring me out.
 
I think it's pretty normal.

Many many years ago when I had my first STRONG acid daytrip at a music festival I looked at the blue sky and it seemed to be coated with bubbling plastic/ceran wrap. That effect easily lasted 10 years.

These days the effects has either become more minor or I am just so used to it that it's become my reality. I definitely still see colors, halos, geometric objects, especially in the dark or when looking at light, particularly closed eyes. I cant really call them full blown hallucinations though. Cannabis does seem to accentuate the effects.

I've had many mega doses and full on OBEs since on things like mescaline, 5 meo dmt, dmt, tma-2 etc and none have produced such long lasting and profound HPPD. I will say I've had a few 5 meo dmt "reactivations" that are mostly induced by other drug use or sex but it's been a few years.
 
I will say I've had a few 5 meo dmt "reactivations" that are mostly induced by other drug use or sex but it's been a few years.

You're the first person I've seen mention reactivations here. That's definitely a thing although I think different from just your run-of-the-mill HPPD. I get them from the time I smoked 15 mg of 5-MeO-EiPT. I'm pretty sure 5-methoxytryptamines trips that are strong enough last forever (in multiple ways).
 
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