While I don't think those comments were productive, some people have fairly negative self-talk and try to motivate themselves and others with that kind of speech. Maybe I'm wrong, but I don't think any harm was intended with those comments and it probably isn't worth getting hung up over either way.
OP, it's crazy how quickly life can change sometimes. The irony is that we can seem to exhaust ourselves in effort to change and nothing seems to move, yet some mistakes that happen in a matter of minutes or seconds will alter the rest of our lives.
I think these types of things are usually wake up calls after a number of missed warning signs. The first car I wrecked was because I was blacked out. We were out celebrating a friends birthday, someone was buying endless rounds, we were doing lines and I was popping bars and hitting a wax pen. Last thing I remember before the wreck is hearing my 2 passengers tell me to slow down. It should have been enough to majorly change my behavior but it didn't, I blamed it on alcohol and kept up everything else- just now I didn't go out to bars or drink. I had already been in the drunk tank a few times and blamed the blackouts on alcohol.
Less than a year later I rolled another car, managing to total 2 parked cars in the process. Again, so lucky I didn't manage to kill anyone or injure myself, but at this point I was too physically addicted and stubborn to change. I had been up all night on MDMA and took oxy and xans for the comedown, ended up nodding out at the wheel. It wasn't the pills this time in my mind, the problem was that I had decided to drive. I went to jail again and got a DUI this time. I think I knew I needed to change and wanted to change at this point but didn't know how.
Ended up going psychotic and getting arrested again, but this time for serious charges, not just an overnighter. I was completely delusional and hearing voices and seeing things. It took a while before I was able to tell the difference between what was real and what was imagined. Some of my delusions are more vivid that some memories, it's crazy. But after that I didn't really have a choice anymore, my life was dramatically altered and there was nothing I could do to reverse it. I've tried to make the most of it, and despite losing most everything and facing criminal charges, I think it has given me a lot of perspective. I wish I would have listened to the warning signs earlier, but even though I didn't it's not too late to change.
Mistakes can give us perspective and bring understanding. I know I learned a lot about myself thought all of this, and I think that is the important part. If you learned something from it then it is life experience. Beating yourself up doesn't lead to anything productive, in order to change we have to first accept the reality of the situation.
OP, it's crazy how quickly life can change sometimes. The irony is that we can seem to exhaust ourselves in effort to change and nothing seems to move, yet some mistakes that happen in a matter of minutes or seconds will alter the rest of our lives.
I think these types of things are usually wake up calls after a number of missed warning signs. The first car I wrecked was because I was blacked out. We were out celebrating a friends birthday, someone was buying endless rounds, we were doing lines and I was popping bars and hitting a wax pen. Last thing I remember before the wreck is hearing my 2 passengers tell me to slow down. It should have been enough to majorly change my behavior but it didn't, I blamed it on alcohol and kept up everything else- just now I didn't go out to bars or drink. I had already been in the drunk tank a few times and blamed the blackouts on alcohol.
Less than a year later I rolled another car, managing to total 2 parked cars in the process. Again, so lucky I didn't manage to kill anyone or injure myself, but at this point I was too physically addicted and stubborn to change. I had been up all night on MDMA and took oxy and xans for the comedown, ended up nodding out at the wheel. It wasn't the pills this time in my mind, the problem was that I had decided to drive. I went to jail again and got a DUI this time. I think I knew I needed to change and wanted to change at this point but didn't know how.
Ended up going psychotic and getting arrested again, but this time for serious charges, not just an overnighter. I was completely delusional and hearing voices and seeing things. It took a while before I was able to tell the difference between what was real and what was imagined. Some of my delusions are more vivid that some memories, it's crazy. But after that I didn't really have a choice anymore, my life was dramatically altered and there was nothing I could do to reverse it. I've tried to make the most of it, and despite losing most everything and facing criminal charges, I think it has given me a lot of perspective. I wish I would have listened to the warning signs earlier, but even though I didn't it's not too late to change.
Mistakes can give us perspective and bring understanding. I know I learned a lot about myself thought all of this, and I think that is the important part. If you learned something from it then it is life experience. Beating yourself up doesn't lead to anything productive, in order to change we have to first accept the reality of the situation.