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Addicted to partying on mdma

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Unregistered1111

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Every saturday nights I have the urge to go out and roll mdma at the rave club. it's like even when i smoke myself retarded with shit load of weed but I still want to go out and roll on mdma
I've tried to keep myself busy on saturday morning/noon but when night comes I just don't feel tired and sleepy and have the urge to go out to the rave club
I know it's bad for me to roll (2 caps) every saturday yet I can not stop... every time on sunday I regret doing this shit every saturday... i think about all the bad stuff that happened while rolling, and also the good times.
I don't know what to do anymore...
 
The only thing that will prevent you from abusing this anymore is you. No matter what we tell you, the decision to stop rolling so frequently is yours and no one else's. If you haven't tested it, you should, to make sure it's not some other amphetamine that you're actually physically addicted to (if it's MDMA you just have a psychological addiction, aka lack of will power). So 1. test your stuff 2. take a long break, at least 3 or 4 months (I'd do 9-12 but anything will help). After that, limit your rolling to once a month MAXIMUM, 3-4 months between rolls is ideal. Also, read through this thread, it will make you think twice about abusing this substance: http://www.bluelight.org/vb/threads/759049-MDMA-Recovery-(Stories-amp-Support-3)
 
Exactly what supersoup said.

MDMA isn't a very forgiving substance if you abuse it. It's not worth it man. Space your rolls, test your shit and you should be fine.

For now, I think a long, long break is needed. I would say at least 6-9 months. I know that must suck to hear but were here just to look out for your health buddy.

You say you get the urge to roll on the weekends. Perhaps you should focus that energy on something like a hobby e.g lifting weights or go out and use that energy to enjoy the night, but at this moment in time I don't think that is a viable option.

At the end of the day you will be the final judge. I just hope you make the right decision
 
This seems to be the case for alot of people, and unfortunatley the only thing to stop most is a very bad incident and/or a horrible or LTC comedown and doing some major damage to the brain. Yes it would be smartest to stop before this happens, but thats not the case for alot of people.. In other words, just dont do it and cut back, if not, you know where it will be going.
 
Ive been dealing with addiction to the whole rolling lifestyle myself for 9 years now. Ive learned the hard way with the most extreme mdma abuse driving myself truly psychotic on many occasions and after to many whirlwinds ive started exhibiting self control although i still go a little overboard on occasion but nothing like i used to. From my years of abuse i can be very overly emotional at times, im easily prone to episodes of depression and sometimes just have crazy thought processes.

Trust me i feel your struggle all to well my friend. All you can do is try to have self control or else rolling will take control of your soul and it will teach you the hard way.

Addiction to rolling and the lifestyle is not as common as some other drugs, but the addiction of rolling can be one of the DARKEST.

It took me several years to learn that with mdma less is more. To much of that magic will burn your soul out. I know the feeling is great and its so easy to crave the great events that come with that lifestyle but its too much for the mind and soul to handle.

I speak from true long term experience of up and down abuse on the rollercoaster that we all know as ecstasy.

Trust me get right before theres no more light, mdma is will turn reality into psychotic fantasy before you even know what happened. Im having horrid chills right now just from mentally reliving my darkest moments of mdma abuse.

This shits no joke, it will demolish even the strongest of people.
 
ive been doing conservative doses everyweekend for 2 month now. I don't go out though, i just do it at home alone or with a friend or two. i actually get no comedown or 3rd day depression like i had in the past, but i'm on heavy opiates everyday now so maybe that has something to do with it. Ive definitely experienced bad 3rd day blues in the past....but this time around I'm not, the ipiates is all I can think is making me not notice it. It sure is tempting though to do it and then not feel bad afterwards and then think its ok to do it the next weekend. reading this forum and my past 3rd day depression episodes are all that is keeping me respecting it.

its getting a little too easy to think i can get away with this behavior lately though.
 
You need to read the stories on the recovery thread to understand what you might be putting yourself in through...it just isn't worth it
 
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