So never really did meth before what was it a week or two ago? I quickly realized you HAVE to sleep and as of this morning HAVE to eat. It was all cool at first, felt good, no hunger, no fatigue. I quickly realized how the addiction starts, you're so worn down from sleeping maybe 5 or 6 hours after 2 benadryl and liquid melatonin, and no food, you HAVE to do meth again to keep your job or keep any schedule. Very quickly you don't get the same buzz and are doing a bump every so often even though it's just keeping you going.
Probably ate 5 or 6 times in last week. Ex kicked me out so my excuse to go get high was easy to find. Try working 2 jobs and living in your car while looking for a place. I fucked up and missed 1 day at one job and 1 at the other the 2nd and 3rd day was dosing. I already knew from old drug trials benadryl and melatonin will make anyone sleep. Still could barely eat, so with small snacks drank protein shakes. I'd sleep about 5 or 6 hours, wake up feeling that weird benny fog and do another line. At first even small bump got me high for a whole day, stupidly I keep doing more to the point I didn't eat, would be sweating for no reason, clenching jaw, and at that point barely able to sleep.
Yesterday had dude get me a 20 as I ran out. Did whole line at work, was big mistake. Was all over thinking and just way to focused on things to where I was checking things over and over. Made it thru the day luckily. 2nd mistake that day, smoked rest of shit I forgot I messed around with on a metal snus container. Didn't think it would do much, but about 20 minutes after I was like on that paranoid psychosis shit. If you've ever iv coke or smoke too much hard you know what I mean.
Went to take shower at gym, literally thought people in gym were talking about me or cop radios were going off. I knew was delusional but still made it very uncomfortable. I got back to my car somehow. Planned on driving but it was 10:30 and knew if I got pulled over in that state I'd be done, even tho wasn't riding dirty. By this point if it was quiet my mind imagined sirens, random shit etc periodically. Lights seemed super crazy to look at, looking in mirrors I thought cops were everywhere, people were coming to harm me.
Sat in my car until 6 am, people in the gym to my mind were like doing crazy violent shit even tho I knew it was contrivance. Drove to rest stop, my driving actually was decent ironically. Probably went under speed limit. Got to rest stop and same weird shit went on for another 6 hours, my mind creating crazy paranoid situations.
Tldr don't do meth, if I wasn't experienced from prior trips would have been far far worse
Probably ate 5 or 6 times in last week. Ex kicked me out so my excuse to go get high was easy to find. Try working 2 jobs and living in your car while looking for a place. I fucked up and missed 1 day at one job and 1 at the other the 2nd and 3rd day was dosing. I already knew from old drug trials benadryl and melatonin will make anyone sleep. Still could barely eat, so with small snacks drank protein shakes. I'd sleep about 5 or 6 hours, wake up feeling that weird benny fog and do another line. At first even small bump got me high for a whole day, stupidly I keep doing more to the point I didn't eat, would be sweating for no reason, clenching jaw, and at that point barely able to sleep.
Yesterday had dude get me a 20 as I ran out. Did whole line at work, was big mistake. Was all over thinking and just way to focused on things to where I was checking things over and over. Made it thru the day luckily. 2nd mistake that day, smoked rest of shit I forgot I messed around with on a metal snus container. Didn't think it would do much, but about 20 minutes after I was like on that paranoid psychosis shit. If you've ever iv coke or smoke too much hard you know what I mean.
Went to take shower at gym, literally thought people in gym were talking about me or cop radios were going off. I knew was delusional but still made it very uncomfortable. I got back to my car somehow. Planned on driving but it was 10:30 and knew if I got pulled over in that state I'd be done, even tho wasn't riding dirty. By this point if it was quiet my mind imagined sirens, random shit etc periodically. Lights seemed super crazy to look at, looking in mirrors I thought cops were everywhere, people were coming to harm me.
Sat in my car until 6 am, people in the gym to my mind were like doing crazy violent shit even tho I knew it was contrivance. Drove to rest stop, my driving actually was decent ironically. Probably went under speed limit. Got to rest stop and same weird shit went on for another 6 hours, my mind creating crazy paranoid situations.
Tldr don't do meth, if I wasn't experienced from prior trips would have been far far worse