pseudonymph
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Aug 22, 2017
- Messages
- 5
Hello fellow Bluelighters!
As many say, longtime lurker, first time poster. I was happy to become a member of this site because I've witnessed the overwhelming support and sencerity from all members and, although I'm quite nervous, I figured I'd share my experience and ask a few questions. I'd like to apologize beforehand if I am posting in the wrong section and/or breaking any rules.
NOTE: I am aware of The Loperamide Megathread however, I was unable to find the answers to my questions. Sorry if this post is redundant.
I'm twenty-five, recently engaged and a long time opiate user. It all started when I was a senior in high school. A friend of mine was addicted to numerous substances, I was naive and it wasn't until almost 5 years later whenever I was on a weekend trip and I'd run out of hydrocodone that I realized I was addicted.
At the first sign of addiction, I wanted to be done. I did everything that week to get clean and was determined to never use again. I was at work when I felt my first rush of sobriety, a smile smeared across my face due to the overwhelming joy of knowing my happiness was coming from a place of purity instead of a pill.
However, as luck would have it, on my 7th day sober I went to a local show and hugged a friend when my ear suctioned to his sweaty chest...I woke up my ex boyfriend at 4 AM the next morning screaming in pain and we went to the emergency room. After waiting 3 days to see my PCP and nearly losing my hearing (doctor said if I'd waited any longer I would've been deaf in said ear), I was put on anti-inflammatories, a steroid, antibiotics and...you guessed it – hydrocodone for my pain.
Needless to say, I relapsed. Went on Subutex for around 1 1/2 years and decided to stop a couple of months ago. Again, just my luck, I'd run out of my klonopin at the same time and I began praying for death. The withdrawals were unbearable. I wound up getting some klonopin from a friend who also had hydrocodone. That weekend, I was heading out of town to float the river with my fiancé and his family so, I bought a few.
It's been about a month or two now that I've been taking the hydrocodone again. My dose never went back to where it was. When I was at my worst, I was taking 80-130 mg per day of 10mg Hydrocodone. Now, I'm somewhere around 40 mg a day, sometimes less, sometimes more.
What I'd like to know is:
1.) being that I was on Subutex for all of that time and suffered through those w/ds only to cowardly fall back on my original DOC, how severe do you think the w/d will be?
2.) I've read about the wonders of Loperamide but I am a bit skeptical, is it possible that they will only prolong the w/d?
3.) If they will NOT prolong the w/d and this is a good route to take, how should I dose the Lope?
All input, personal experiences and opinions are appreciated. Again, I'm sorry if I didn't meet the guidelines and it was not done intentionally as this is my first post. I am more determined than ever to get off of opiates and be myself again. Thank you for reading. I am very eager to begin this journey. I only have a few Hydrocodone pills left and I am tempted to just toss them out and begin the w/d process. I hope to build some relationships on here to help the process along, have someone to talk to and potentially help others in similar positions.
As many say, longtime lurker, first time poster. I was happy to become a member of this site because I've witnessed the overwhelming support and sencerity from all members and, although I'm quite nervous, I figured I'd share my experience and ask a few questions. I'd like to apologize beforehand if I am posting in the wrong section and/or breaking any rules.
NOTE: I am aware of The Loperamide Megathread however, I was unable to find the answers to my questions. Sorry if this post is redundant.
I'm twenty-five, recently engaged and a long time opiate user. It all started when I was a senior in high school. A friend of mine was addicted to numerous substances, I was naive and it wasn't until almost 5 years later whenever I was on a weekend trip and I'd run out of hydrocodone that I realized I was addicted.
At the first sign of addiction, I wanted to be done. I did everything that week to get clean and was determined to never use again. I was at work when I felt my first rush of sobriety, a smile smeared across my face due to the overwhelming joy of knowing my happiness was coming from a place of purity instead of a pill.
However, as luck would have it, on my 7th day sober I went to a local show and hugged a friend when my ear suctioned to his sweaty chest...I woke up my ex boyfriend at 4 AM the next morning screaming in pain and we went to the emergency room. After waiting 3 days to see my PCP and nearly losing my hearing (doctor said if I'd waited any longer I would've been deaf in said ear), I was put on anti-inflammatories, a steroid, antibiotics and...you guessed it – hydrocodone for my pain.
Needless to say, I relapsed. Went on Subutex for around 1 1/2 years and decided to stop a couple of months ago. Again, just my luck, I'd run out of my klonopin at the same time and I began praying for death. The withdrawals were unbearable. I wound up getting some klonopin from a friend who also had hydrocodone. That weekend, I was heading out of town to float the river with my fiancé and his family so, I bought a few.
It's been about a month or two now that I've been taking the hydrocodone again. My dose never went back to where it was. When I was at my worst, I was taking 80-130 mg per day of 10mg Hydrocodone. Now, I'm somewhere around 40 mg a day, sometimes less, sometimes more.
What I'd like to know is:
1.) being that I was on Subutex for all of that time and suffered through those w/ds only to cowardly fall back on my original DOC, how severe do you think the w/d will be?
2.) I've read about the wonders of Loperamide but I am a bit skeptical, is it possible that they will only prolong the w/d?
3.) If they will NOT prolong the w/d and this is a good route to take, how should I dose the Lope?
All input, personal experiences and opinions are appreciated. Again, I'm sorry if I didn't meet the guidelines and it was not done intentionally as this is my first post. I am more determined than ever to get off of opiates and be myself again. Thank you for reading. I am very eager to begin this journey. I only have a few Hydrocodone pills left and I am tempted to just toss them out and begin the w/d process. I hope to build some relationships on here to help the process along, have someone to talk to and potentially help others in similar positions.