doofqueen
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Oct 27, 2002
- Messages
- 9,993
Santa Claus
How old were you when you discovered Santa wasn't real? How did you feel about it and how did you find out? Or were you not raised to believe in him?
As most of you would know i have a nine year old little boy that i raise on my own. I have raised him to believe in Santa because this is how i was raised and just passed the tradition on. It seemed like the normal thing to do because all of society does it.
Over the past two years though my thoughts and feelings have changed about it and i wish i hadn't of because i don't like what Santa represents and all that comes with it.
I have this book called "The boy you brought home : A single mother's guide to raising sons" by John Marsden
It's basically a light hearted, funny and common sense list of 101 things you should do as a single mother raising a boy. (It's not the be all and end all of parenting, just something interesting i picked up ages ago) It's really good actually because i didn't have any brothers and all of a sudden i'm a single mum trying to raise a boy into a man and i have no clue what boys do and what's "normal" or whatever. Not that there is a 'normal' but you know. He's taught ME alot though about what boys do and how they act.
No 3 in the book says "Don't tell him that santa claus, the tooth fairy and the easter bunny are true"
The reason it gives is this....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Ours is probably the only culture in the history of the world that condones the practice of parents lying to children. In other cultures, when adults told children about spirits, trlls and leprechauns, the adults themselves were believers. That's not the case in Western society in the 21st century.
The problem is that many children were shattered when they find out the truth. What shatters them is not that santa doesn't exsist, but their parents have been lying to them all these years.
That doesn't mean we have to get rid of santa altogether. Children love playing games with adults, and they understand perfectly well when you are in 'game mode' and when you are in 'reality mode'. So it's fine to present these mythical people as part of a game. Come December, you can play the "Santa game", and have heaps of fun with it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
^^ What do people think about that?
I have this overwelming desire to tell him but feel like shit that i have been lying to him and being dishonest because we have a very close, open and honest relationship and he highly trusts me
I don't want to take the magic out of xmas for him though because he still believes in it (although i have a funny feeling he doesn't and either just wants to keep believeing or is maybe still working it out) and i was the one tht planted the idea in his head in the first place *slaps herself*
*sighs*
How old were you when you discovered Santa wasn't real? How did you feel about it and how did you find out? Or were you not raised to believe in him?
As most of you would know i have a nine year old little boy that i raise on my own. I have raised him to believe in Santa because this is how i was raised and just passed the tradition on. It seemed like the normal thing to do because all of society does it.
Over the past two years though my thoughts and feelings have changed about it and i wish i hadn't of because i don't like what Santa represents and all that comes with it.
I have this book called "The boy you brought home : A single mother's guide to raising sons" by John Marsden
It's basically a light hearted, funny and common sense list of 101 things you should do as a single mother raising a boy. (It's not the be all and end all of parenting, just something interesting i picked up ages ago) It's really good actually because i didn't have any brothers and all of a sudden i'm a single mum trying to raise a boy into a man and i have no clue what boys do and what's "normal" or whatever. Not that there is a 'normal' but you know. He's taught ME alot though about what boys do and how they act.
No 3 in the book says "Don't tell him that santa claus, the tooth fairy and the easter bunny are true"
The reason it gives is this....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Ours is probably the only culture in the history of the world that condones the practice of parents lying to children. In other cultures, when adults told children about spirits, trlls and leprechauns, the adults themselves were believers. That's not the case in Western society in the 21st century.
The problem is that many children were shattered when they find out the truth. What shatters them is not that santa doesn't exsist, but their parents have been lying to them all these years.
That doesn't mean we have to get rid of santa altogether. Children love playing games with adults, and they understand perfectly well when you are in 'game mode' and when you are in 'reality mode'. So it's fine to present these mythical people as part of a game. Come December, you can play the "Santa game", and have heaps of fun with it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
^^ What do people think about that?
I have this overwelming desire to tell him but feel like shit that i have been lying to him and being dishonest because we have a very close, open and honest relationship and he highly trusts me
I don't want to take the magic out of xmas for him though because he still believes in it (although i have a funny feeling he doesn't and either just wants to keep believeing or is maybe still working it out) and i was the one tht planted the idea in his head in the first place *slaps herself*
*sighs*
