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Weight gain that doesn't have to make me so upset.

xxsicknessxx

xxsicknessxx

Bluelighter
Joined
Jun 26, 2008
Messages
1,015
How do I go from 187 to 195 today. Isn't that too much weight to gain in one day? Like I went from 187 to 185 then to 195 today. It really depressed me and tomorrow probably won't be better. I used to be 455 so I have issues gaining weight I just want to weight 185-187.

Why can't I be happy why didn't getting sober fix anything. Not that it wasn't too do drugs anymore bit wouldn't mind killing myself with heroin today. Yes because I gained 8 pounds.

Im just really upset about this and what can I do but think about it until tomorrow when I weight myself again.

☹️

I just don't get it. That's so much weight to gain during the night. I don't know could I of eaten 5 pounds of food. I don't think so I have a five pound dumbbell it's seriously heavy to me.


I really think I should give up. I never get a answer that helps anyways. Hmmm.

I'm just getting my feelings out. Later. Whatever.
 
I love how my sister leaves her meth pipe out in the open. I even had to tell her to hide her meth. I want to tell her it's because I'm sober you bitch but I just said my parents might see. What's wrong with me? Why can't I take control of my life. Why can't I just get back to normal. Like normal normal.
 
I'm going for a walk. But I feel like I'm losing. Or doesn't feel healthy to be to see the scale move up so I start walking. I don't understand why I go up and down ten pounds and have for like the last year. It's strange to me. Plus I'd kill myself if I ever got fat again. 455 pounds was super hard to live with. I gained 50 pounds after the truck hit me. Because I was in the hospital, I spent almost a year in bed recovering eating pudding. I just get scared that like when I was fat I don't control my body it controls me. Oh well. I'm going for a walk! I just don't like this I wish I felt safe at this weight but i don't. I always freak when I gain a pound I'm so always happy when I go dowb sand the only time I felt control my weight was when I did meth. I lost that 50 pounds with meth . It worked really well. I'm sober a year half now. Dunno dunno what's wrong with my minds ATM . Things should be getting better for me. Oh well I appreciate the comments. Thanks.
 
I just am 37. And I want to get in shape for the rest of my life by 40. That's my goal what's normal mean to me. I just mean ready to join them military in shape. Like run a mile in shape. Because I want to enjoy life. Sobriety is alright but maybe getting in shape will fill that space that drugs left. Meth left. I dunno. Thanks. I dunno why I got so mad I go above 200 sometimes. It shouldn't shock me to be 195
But I can't change the way my brain feels. Thanks for the thoughts
 
@xxsicknessxx,

You’ve mentioned undergoing bariatric surgery in prior threads. Be assured that no matter the means by which you’ve achieved success, losing 57%-58% of your total body weight is a remarkable feat! Recognize and celebrate yourself as a success story!

Keeping a substantial portion of weight off is no easy endeavor. I imagine fears re: regain can be tremendously overwhelming, even when the scale goes up by just 5 or 10 pounds. You may even know people who’ve worked hard to lose weight, only to see it return, plus additional pounds, in some cases.

Was there originally a psychologist, LCSW or therapist whom you consulted with, prior to or during the time of your surgery? If so, I would seek help from them now, if they’re available to post op patients.

If you don’t have a therapist to return to, there are therapists who specialize in weight loss issues that are helpful for those who’ve successfully lost weight, but fear, or may be seeing, a few pounds creep back on.

Manage your post op expectations and address patterns of behavior that might jeopardize your success now, while any gains you’re seeing are still minimal.

A variety of things can affect your weight from day to day. It’s for this reason many healthcare providers discourage daily weigh-ins, instead encouraging patients to weigh in once weekly, on the same day at the same time.

Hypervigilance re: what you eat is OK; you want to stop any small weight gains now, before a few pounds becomes a seemingly insurmountable amount of weight to have to lose again.

Best of luck to you!
 
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