Mental Health Think I need therapy

[oopsiedogirl]

Think I need some sort of therapy as I can just switch and get violent ready to slash someone up real quick and the funniest thing is im.spiritual as fucka new age manifest your own realty cosmic unity infinite consciousness type of dude but I get so vexed fuming if someone disrespect me or trys fucking with me that I just switch and want to ruin their life or stab them or brake all.there shit its almost demonic like I will give u an example I live in a shared house and somebody grassed me up for smoking a joint out my window even tho it was raining so I responded by taking the furniture they wanted in.the empty room which they wanted help moving after grassing me up then they stole my wine so I flipped broke all their plates threw all their food ahd cooking stuff into the abyss and pulled my rambo on them thats been a new thing for me gettintvso mad I wanna just shank someone daylight murder but like I say im spiritual and believe in compassion

Nailed it.
I will give my last dollar to a homeless person (last dollar and all my change if homeless person has a dog), yet I can entertain myself with glorious thoughts of running someone over (9 out of 10 times my boyfriend of 7 years) minutes later.
This is the third time I’ve ever shared here. The first time I deleted it because I think I did it wrong. I sit back and read a lot. Been a member for about a year(?) but lurked for at least 10 years before becoming one. Point is, what you said is very compelling to me.
Has there been any situational change in your life recently? When you feel rage, is it always at home? Toward the same person? What, if any, is the common denominator when feeling this way?
Underneath anger are usually two things: Fear and pain. I learned that in therapy. Which I need, but is not feasible right now...
When I am angry, I take into account how much dope (meth) I am going through as well. I am a seasoned, fairly disciplined (I choose to not IV anymore, I always eat, hydrate, usually sleep every night, etc.) user who tries my damndest to keep my shit together but who is only human...There are so many facets to anger and rage. Take some time to sit with yourself and find what is triggering your rage. Not for anyone but you, because I hate the self-loathing and confusion that goes along with it. I also hate how my heart seemingly palpitates and how tense my body gets and I am fully aware of how bad it is for my health (like I’m not putting my body through enough already ). Feel free to pm me for support.

 

[oopsiedogirl]

be careful with the rebound anger of xannax use aswell.

Oh hell to the yeah on that. The two do not mix. A small amount of each most definitely potentiate. Least I feel is liquid courage times 5. Most is total blackout.