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Positive The Tapering Supportive/Social Thread

Dundermifflin8699

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May 13, 2021
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Yeah, the long slow taper never worked for me either. Too impatient I guess.

There’s something called “Opioid Induced Hyperalgesia” where the painkillers are causing new pains. No doubt I was having that problem as well.

I actually have a Dr appt next week. I’m not ready to drop my prescription completely yet (long story), but I don’t need it anymore. I’m in a new head-space now and I’m actually annoyed that I have to deal with making time to have the appointment and go to the pharmacy. It’s such a new experience because I have spent the last few years planning my life around my refills and now it’s just a huge nuisance.
I used to have a sixth sense about the day of the month, how many pills left, how long to my next refill, etc. Yesterday I got a text message from the Dr’s office, a reminder about my appointment this week, and I was really surprised. It feels like a week since the last one.

Things are changing. It feels really slow until I look back and see how far I have come. It sounds like you have some experience in this arena. We’re going to get there, wherever ‘there’ might be. No question the journey won’t be as we had planned but we’ll make it to the other side eventually. It just sucks in the in-between parts of the trip.
Have had hyperalgia for at least five or six years..
Essentially totally screwing up your bodies receptors for pain..
Stubbing your toe feels like you're going to die
I would imagine this will take long long time the resolve back to normal
 

n3ophy7e

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Have had hyperalgia for at least five or six years..
Essentially totally screwing up your bodies receptors for pain..
Stubbing your toe feels like you're going to die
I would imagine this will take long long time the resolve back to normal
I had hyperalgesia for a long time after quitting opiates too. I was convinced I had some kind of neuropathy because I had nerve pain in my hands, feet, hips, back, shoulders, neck, all the time, and I had intense headaches too. I had CT scans and MRIs, there was nothing wrong with me of course. It was all just the pain receptors going haywire after prolonged opiate abuse.
 

Squeaky

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I had hyperalgesia for a long time after quitting opiates too. I was convinced I had some kind of neuropathy because I had nerve pain in my hands, feet, hips, back, shoulders, neck, all the time, and I had intense headaches too. I had CT scans and MRIs, there was nothing wrong with me of course. It was all just the pain receptors going haywire after prolonged opiate abuse.
I think that Kratom is keeping that under wraps for me. Sounds like it would really suck.
 

n3ophy7e

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I think that Kratom is keeping that under wraps for me. Sounds like it would really suck.
Oh yeah it would be. It was more perplexing and annoying than anything. I missed a fair few days off work due to the discomfort, specialist appointments etc, all to eventually realise that there was nothing wrong with my body, and it was just a part of opiate withdrawals.
 

Squeaky

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I went this whole month without cravings for my pills. It’s time for me to pick up my prescription again and as much as I want some relief..... I have soooo many recent memories of the multitude of ways those pills destroyed my life. I had a brief moment of thinking “just once” “it’s Friday” “I deserve a break”, but that instantly became “that would ruin my weekend, and probably the next two weeks”.
I spent a lot of time convincing myself that this month would be different, and it was always the same. It kept escalating until until a blind person could see there was a problem and somehow I was still in denial.
I’m not recommending anyone else do it my way, but it definitely is working now. I don’t have cravings, only memories of how much it sucked to go to work or try to hang out with my kid while I was making excuses for being in withdrawal. It has been a long difficult journey but I don’t think any other route would have worked. It’s sort of profound that I’m not sad or angry, and I do still remember the good times, but all of the horrible crap I have put myself through is the first thing that comes to mind when I start thinking that it would be OK to use my pills “just once”.

And it’s going to sound like an alcoholic renting an apartment above a liquor store, but I’m picking up my prescription again today. I haven’t touched it for about 6 weeks now and I have no interest in doing so.
 

Squeaky

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Edit.... I definitely had some interest in using my script. I was actually in quite a bit of pain from sitting in traffic for 3 hours. If my wife had said it was OK, I definitely would have went for the pain relief. I guess it’s good she got in my way. So I got drunk instead. Ha!!!!!
 

Dundermifflin8699

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Coming down to the end of the month tapering again down to one to two tabs Norco daily, but hit the tramadol hard in last few weeks..
Really need to rip the Band-Aid and be done with it...

So am I going to call in a refill request Tuesday and live groundhog Day all over again?
 

Squeaky

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Coming down to the end of the month tapering again down to one to two tabs Norco daily, but hit the tramadol hard in last few weeks..
Really need to rip the Band-Aid and be done with it...

So am I going to call in a refill request Tuesday and live groundhog Day all over again?
Temptation is a Bitch. I’d say don’t get it filled, but I’m no hypocrite so I won’t go there. Every bit of advice I can think of would be something I was given and ignored.
What I will say is that my experience has taught me that the monthly schedule of prescription refills is perfectly designed to keep us addicted. It takes me about 30 days of cold turkey to get to where I can see the other side and start to have hope. I’m a long way from being completely past the depression, but at 30 days I started to see the light at the end of the tunnel. The crappy part is that there will always be another refill day before I could get to that place of hope and it basically seems pointless to suffer. I have said it recently, “Just once” or “I deserve a break”, it all means you suffered through these weeks and you WILL be doing it again. Everyone can see how hard the first few days are but that is mainly physical wd’s. The PAWS is like childbirth: It doesn’t matter how much it sucked..... after a while you forget, or tell yourself it wasn’t so bad, then you fantasize about the good parts and decide it’s totally worth the pain.

If you get that script filled, you will most likely use it. If that happens you WILL find yourself back right here. You WILL go through everything all over again. You will hate yourself enough to get right back into using the pills every day and you will be a little older next time you withdrawl off the pills. I’m never going to preach and tell you to be strong but I will say that you should know that this is likely the future, and I think it might help you to face it before you go back down that road.

The best thing I ever did was to just find a way to pass time. Yard work, Netflix, etc. Time is a big problem in withdrawal. Even if I was hurting my day would go faster if I was busy, and fasterer is betterer. And believe it or not..... BlueLight sometimes made things worse just because it meant focusing on my problems for a few minutes instead of being busy doing anything else.

You have made more progress than you are giving yourself credit for. Somewhere in the loneliness and the depression there is a huge temptation to go back to the pills because they take it away. Just don’t go back unless you can be honest with yourself about the future.
 

Pumpkin2021

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Temptation is a Bitch. I’d say don’t get it filled, but I’m no hypocrite so I won’t go there. Every bit of advice I can think of would be something I was given and ignored.
What I will say is that my experience has taught me that the monthly schedule of prescription refills is perfectly designed to keep us addicted. It takes me about 30 days of cold turkey to get to where I can see the other side and start to have hope. I’m a long way from being completely past the depression, but at 30 days I started to see the light at the end of the tunnel. The crappy part is that there will always be another refill day before I could get to that place of hope and it basically seems pointless to suffer. I have said it recently, “Just once” or “I deserve a break”, it all means you suffered through these weeks and you WILL be doing it again. Everyone can see how hard the first few days are but that is mainly physical wd’s. The PAWS is like childbirth: It doesn’t matter how much it sucked..... after a while you forget, or tell yourself it wasn’t so bad, then you fantasize about the good parts and decide it’s totally worth the pain.

If you get that script filled, you will most likely use it. If that happens you WILL find yourself back right here. You WILL go through everything all over again. You will hate yourself enough to get right back into using the pills every day and you will be a little older next time you withdrawl off the pills. I’m never going to preach and tell you to be strong but I will say that you should know that this is likely the future, and I think it might help you to face it before you go back down that road.

The best thing I ever did was to just find a way to pass time. Yard work, Netflix, etc. Time is a big problem in withdrawal. Even if I was hurting my day would go faster if I was busy, and fasterer is betterer. And believe it or not..... BlueLight sometimes made things worse just because it meant focusing on my problems for a few minutes instead of being busy doing anything else.

You have made more progress than you are giving yourself credit for. Somewhere in the loneliness and the depression there is a huge temptation to go back to the pills because they take it away. Just don’t go back unless you can be honest with yourself about the future.
I am so happy that all that past behavior clicked with you and all the bells and whistles fell into place and the rose colored glasses came off. Like you said, you aren't 100% yet ( hell who is ) but you have come a LONG way from where you were 60 days ago. Congrats, Squeaky.
 

Squeaky

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I am so happy that all that past behavior clicked with you and all the bells and whistles fell into place and the rose colored glasses came off. Like you said, you aren't 100% yet ( hell who is ) but you have come a LONG way from where you were 60 days ago. Congrats, Squeaky.
Thanks Pumpkin 🎃
 

Dundermifflin8699

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I concur.....its a bitch..
The spinal and joint stuff come roaring back, of of course the behavior that i know is norco/Tramadol for so many years....
Yes, 100 reasons to not go there, yet the lion is pacing...
 

Squeaky

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I concur.....its a bitch..
The spinal and joint stuff come roaring back, of of course the behavior that i know is norco/Tramadol for so many years....
Yes, 100 reasons to not go there, yet the lion is pacing...
No kidding. I got my script filled and spent the weekend wishing I hadn’t committed to quitting. I’m good now..... but I almost wasn’t
 

tweakette

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Dec 10, 2008
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I just looked this up because I was going to try and taper but it looks like no one is helping by telling him try Keaton or subs. I tried doing subs with microdosing but not one person on here had tried it and succeeded and when I took the .25 mg for a few days I felt the heroin wear off the first 2 days super quick and then as I went to .5 a day I felt it block my dose.

what I’m going to do is I’m going to take my scale and weigh out my h. Then cut it up into a half gram per day to start for a week. I’m gonna have trouble sleeping so I have Xanax and I take a 1/4 of a 2mg bar to sleep. I’ll weigh the 1/2 gram into baggies and that is all I get for the day.

Then I’m going to drop 5-15% per week. So I guess start with 15% the first week, and as I get to smaller amounts do 5% drop. I’m over getting high, so I guess we will see how it goes.

I hate subs because if you have a real habit Suboxone only helps with half the withdrawals for the first 3-4 days before it evens out. I don’t have time for that, and then methadone you can’t ever get off.

Once I get down to a super tiny habit, I’ll take about 5mg of naltrexone tablet and I have a bunch of comfort meds like chlonidine, Xanax, muscle relaxers, (everything I was given in my accelerated detox), and then wake up 2 days later detoxed (done it before). I’m hoping this method I won’t deal with withdrawals for 6 months. Last time I went cold Turkey I had withdrawals for 6 months, no not PAWS, physical withdrawals, and that’s why I relapsed…
 

n3ophy7e

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I concur.....its a bitch..
The spinal and joint stuff come roaring back, of of course the behavior that i know is norco/Tramadol for so many years....
Yes, 100 reasons to not go there, yet the lion is pacing...
How are you going now? Did you get through the week okay?
 

HatingThisLife

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Joined
Dec 6, 2020
Messages
154
I just looked this up because I was going to try and taper but it looks like no one is helping by telling him try Keaton or subs. I tried doing subs with microdosing but not one person on here had tried it and succeeded and when I took the .25 mg for a few days I felt the heroin wear off the first 2 days super quick and then as I went to .5 a day I felt it block my dose.

what I’m going to do is I’m going to take my scale and weigh out my h. Then cut it up into a half gram per day to start for a week. I’m gonna have trouble sleeping so I have Xanax and I take a 1/4 of a 2mg bar to sleep. I’ll weigh the 1/2 gram into baggies and that is all I get for the day.

Then I’m going to drop 5-15% per week. So I guess start with 15% the first week, and as I get to smaller amounts do 5% drop. I’m over getting high, so I guess we will see how it goes.

I hate subs because if you have a real habit Suboxone only helps with half the withdrawals for the first 3-4 days before it evens out. I don’t have time for that, and then methadone you can’t ever get off.

Once I get down to a super tiny habit, I’ll take about 5mg of naltrexone tablet and I have a bunch of comfort meds like chlonidine, Xanax, muscle relaxers, (everything I was given in my accelerated detox), and then wake up 2 days later detoxed (done it before). I’m hoping this method I won’t deal with withdrawals for 6 months. Last time I went cold Turkey I had withdrawals for 6 months, no not PAWS, physical withdrawals, and that’s why I relapsed…
You had acute physical withdrawals from H for 6 months??? Please come back and let us know of this works out for you. I want to do it too. Maybe even get a time lock safe...
 

Squeaky

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No, not great.. back on norco....im sorry to say...
Sciatic pain came severe, but i hope to do better.
Thank you for asking....
I had some severe pain when I ran out every month. Some was nerve pain from my accident, some is simply because I have hardware that my body is not happy about, and some was because of the withdrawals. I wanted to hit my surgeon because he insisted I needed to “get off the narcotics!!!”. I had tried quitting the pills, for a few weeks, and my pain seemed to stabilize after a few weeks but it never reached a point where I could say I might never need the pills again. And if I have to suffer then I might as well be happy right? Gimme my damn pills......
I don’t claim to know anything about anything, but after having been off the painkillers for about two months now I can say this: The pain killers we’re definitely squashing my pain during the hour or two while they were working, but withdrawals would kick in about 2 hours after each dose and my pain would return with some serious amplification. I still hurt right now, all day with little hope for relief, but my daily average of pain is definitely a bit less lately than it would be if I we’re taking my oxy as prescribed. AND... with the painkillers I would have my normal pain in between doses PLUS withdrawals PLUS whatever amplifier the wd’s we’re doing to my back pain.
None of this became obvious until I had been away from oxy for 4 or 5 weeks. And even at that time: if I think about the good times when I had pills I go down a rabbit hole of despair and dwell on how much it all sucks. Somehow that makes me hurt more and the only solution that could possibly exist is going back to the pills.

It’s a vicious cycle and the only solutions I have found is to get stoned and bing Netflix or just get up and keep myself really busy so I can’t think about it.
 

Dundermifflin8699

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Messages
75
I had some severe pain when I ran out every month. Some was nerve pain from my accident, some is simply because I have hardware that my body is not happy about, and some was because of the withdrawals. I wanted to hit my surgeon because he insisted I needed to “get off the narcotics!!!”. I had tried quitting the pills, for a few weeks, and my pain seemed to stabilize after a few weeks but it never reached a point where I could say I might never need the pills again. And if I have to suffer then I might as well be happy right? Gimme my damn pills......
I don’t claim to know anything about anything, but after having been off the painkillers for about two months now I can say this: The pain killers we’re definitely squashing my pain during the hour or two while they were working, but withdrawals would kick in about 2 hours after each dose and my pain would return with some serious amplification. I still hurt right now, all day with little hope for relief, but my daily average of pain is definitely a bit less lately than it would be if I we’re taking my oxy as prescribed. AND... with the painkillers I would have my normal pain in between doses PLUS withdrawals PLUS whatever amplifier the wd’s we’re doing to my back pain.
None of this became obvious until I had been away from oxy for 4 or 5 weeks. And even at that time: if I think about the good times when I had pills I go down a rabbit hole of despair and dwell on how much it all sucks. Somehow that makes me hurt more and the only solution that could possibly exist is going back to the pills.

It’s a vicious cycle and the only solutions I have found is to get stoned and bing Netflix or just get up and keep myself really busy so I can’t think about it.
Well said...
Im right there on all of it...
Those pills just own me lots of times..
I'll taper tomorrow, next week, and all that self talk.
Thank you for the kind words.. .

I really lean toward isolation and I was going to go visit my daughter with my wife today and part of my brain instead of sit on the couch and play rock music...
 

TheShadowKnows

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Jun 22, 2021
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I just did her/fent to subs last week. All H has fent in it these days unless you know who's making it. For the sale of argument I'll say "most" of the time at least. Either way, this makes going onto subs difficult as the fent sticks in your receptors and puts you into PWDs. I didn't have time to do the Bernese method, I had 5 days off work to get onto subs or look forward to another year of spending all my money/time on shitty fake dope.
On Sunday by midnight I did all of my stash. All of it, so I couldn't "find" some later. On Monday I slept as late as possible. By Monday night my COWS were pretty high but I still waited. Took a bnzo and slept a little. By 36 hours I figured I could try it. I took about 1mg sub. Sick as f*ck for the next 12 hours (PWS). However by Tuesday (about 48 hours in) i ate a tiny piece of sub strip (.75mg?). Didn't feel great but it got better. By Wednesday i'd slowly finished 8mg over time. I try to get relief with as little sub as possible and find that 2mg am & pm (4 mg total per day) work just fine for me.
Yes I have a considerable, long term (5+ years) habit, doctors overprescribe sub IMO and my goal is to jump off within the next month or two so no need to taper off more. By Thursday I could actually leave the house. 2mg AM & 2mg PM. Been there ever since. Hope to stay.
If you even suspect your drugs have fent in them you will need to wait 48-72 hours to avoid PWDs. To me this was so discouraging I almost didn't try at all. But it was literally 2 days of sickness and I am feeling really good and so glad to be off of the fent, which I had unintentionally become addicted to. I hope this inspires some of you guys to just do it, if you can get 3 days to climb the walls in your room (or a hotel, or friend's, or wherever) its so worth it. Good luck!
PS: I'd gone from Oxy to subs before in about 12 hours no problem. Fent is really sticky. The shit sucks. And it's in EVERYTHING.
 
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