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TDS The Tapering Supportive/Social Thread

Painful One

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 18, 2017
Messages
1,188
I do not really believe that I will feel better " Because that is what is Supposed to happen"
I am afraid that I am buying in to a whole bag of Bullshit. I feel better on my opiodes, and life is fine except for when I run out and withdrawls kick in. If this whole fucking Epidemic was not here I think life would be Grand?? Is that just my addiction talking ??
It sounds like you are living with chronic pain.
I found that the best I can do is to hold steady and keep stable.

For those with just the addiction problem, life is definitely better without medication and worth it to go through the hell. It will end one day. Life will improve and be so much better.

For those living with true chronic pain.... managing the symptoms and holding steady with the least amount of medication is the best one can do. That is what I have found after living with this problem for 13 years now. Trying to go without medication drove me to try and suicide myself.

Everyone must access their own personal situation and do what is best for them.

I hope everyone is doing well today. Sending you all lots of love and support!
 

Squeaky

Bluelighter
Joined
Feb 1, 2016
Messages
969
Location
USA
""It is a lot easier to taper than cold turkey or rapid taper. If you go slowly enough, the withdrawal is minimal and you are not putting yourself at risk for seizures and other problems. I also think that tapering helps with paws. Your body is slowly getting weaned down so it isn’t such a shock and you can slowly just get used to not needing or wanting the medication.
You will start to feel better without it.""

i don't like living in a paws world. and i don't like living in pain. so i really pretty much don't like living at all. except when i take a small dose of opiate, then i feel alot better.

i don't over use my opiate intake anymore, but i still have to depend on it for pain relief.

other than that i drink lot's of diet coke for stomach hurt. it works and sometimes i eat alot of sugar now.

it looks like it's getting ready to rain and the cool weather looks good somehow.

💜

so. . i always have a xanax for a party once in a while.
they are so addicting though, just thinking about it feels like such a good idea. i know better though. he hee.
Do a little research on Aspertame. Its the artificial sweetener in Diet Coke. Then go to McD’s and sit near the soda fountain for a bit. It’s the heaviest bunch of people drinking the most deit Coke.
The Diet Coke may be causing your stomach problems. It takes around 3 weeks of being off it completely to see a difference. Switch to club soda for a while. Maybe your stomach problems go away for ever.....
 

Squeaky

Bluelighter
Joined
Feb 1, 2016
Messages
969
Location
USA
I think you should do what you can and whatever is really best for your quality of life.
That is pretty much the main concern for you and I.
Keep as comfortable as possible.

I can’t do it without my medication’s. My symptoms are severe. It is the only way I can think to be honest.
I have no judgement on what your doing at all.

I guess you have two choices. Well three.
1- stay on just the oxy
2-stay on just the loperamide and Kratom
3- try to stop both.

I’m here.i know this is tough. Living in pain and having the neurological thing sucks.
I want you to be as comfortable as possible.
I did just stick it out until my body readjusted and it did.
It wasn’t great but not that bad and now it is done and reset tolerance.
It was hell for me going back and forth too much.
Thank you PO
I get yet another refill tomorrow. I’m already making the same excuses that I make every month. As I sit here hurting I plan to take half my prescribed dose for the month. Not so I can taper down but so I can save some pills. I won’t save any though. I never do
I guess I’m not ready to stop. The pain is making decisions for me.

On a side note. Kratom comes with mild wds after weeks of use. I take it all day, every day, now. I wake up in withdrawl every morning from the Kratom. Nothing like oxy, but similar. Enough to be uncomfortable.
 

Hylight

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 4, 2019
Messages
705
I do not really believe that I will feel better " Because that is what is Supposed to happen"
I am afraid that I am buying in to a whole bag of Bullshit. I feel better on my opiodes, and life is fine except for when I run out and withdrawls kick in. If this whole fucking Epidemic was not here I think life would be Grand?? Is that just my addiction talking ??
no, imho i used to even eat healthier move around to the point i could function do things and stay optimally healthy and did'nt go over what was prescribed. now they just act like i am asking for trouble when i ask for what helps me to live well and was doing perfectly for me. now i feel like i'm going to get diabetes because all i do is sit around and eat sugar. all because of an opioid crisis. i really don't think everyone is in an opioid crisis, and if there are a lot that are indeed in an opioid crisis then they should get the proper help. it might even help the economy, you know create jobs out there. i am not sure what happened to all of the opioids and why there is fentanyl instead but maybe there is a poppy shortage. like we reached peak poppies and we are on the down slide. maybe i am just wrong maybe this is all just a bunch of lies. remember reefer madness and how marijuana is going to make you climb on the top of your roof and throw yourself off because it WAS so dangerous. ? well that was a LIE also. sori i am sick of not being able to ask for one just one prescription because a bunch of people that need help and aren't being helped somehow. i never even got constipated cause i fuckin ate healthy and had servings of fruits and vegetables EVERY day. i don't care if this doesnt get read because it TL .
if you drink too much water it'll kill you too. so its about wanting to be educated and moderate as best as possible. i want some pain medication and they all glare at me like the Gestapo will put them away. well at least the good govt. allows us the good medicinal marijuana that once was going to destroy the planet like the nukes on the edge. fukin priks can't give me a little piece of acetametphine with some codeine or 10 little frieking mg's of opioid in it. haha its all a LIE and nothing ever bad happened to me when i was getting my prescription.
could this be why. if it is then that's pretty dark.
 
Last edited:

Painful One

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 18, 2017
Messages
1,188
Good luck Squeaky.
Just do the best you can.
Don’t anticipate that you will not make the Oxy last.
Don’t put too much pressure on yourself to change things either.
I find the pressure makes it worse.

You are correct, the pain is making decisions for us.
Maybe you can work out a schedule between the three medications that allows you to always have some Oxy for the pain.
Hang in there brother.
 

Squeaky

Bluelighter
Joined
Feb 1, 2016
Messages
969
Location
USA
Good luck Squeaky.
Just do the best you can.
Don’t anticipate that you will not make the Oxy last.
Don’t put too much pressure on yourself to change things either.
I find the pressure makes it worse.

You are correct, the pain is making decisions for us.
Maybe you can work out a schedule between the three medications that allows you to always have some Oxy for the pain.
Hang in there brother.
I certainly need to do some work. And its more complicated than I thought. I see now why a good rehab program is 90 days.

It is amazing how our decisions can be driven by pain. I now plan every aspect of my life around what I cannot do anymore and whether or not I will have enough medication to do it. At this point I would turn down a free trip to Hawaii if it interfered with my pain management Dr appt.

P.O. I am so happy that you got back on track with your prescribed dose. Sometimes I get excited about being free from the pills, but I think you’re right and I need more attainable goals. Getting back to my prescribed dose is a more realistic target.

Still no word from Shroomi??
 

Squeaky

Bluelighter
Joined
Feb 1, 2016
Messages
969
Location
USA
I got my refill today. I had been out of pills for 18 days this time. Long enough that I had forgotten how nice it is to not hurt.
No doubt I’m addicted, just not in the way most people would think. I don’t get high. I’m not struggling with withdrawals. I’m not using the pills to tune out my kids or make my job more bearable.
I’m addicted to that moment when the pain in my pelvis and legs sort of drains away. The plan of taking my medication on an empty stomach, sitting down, and waiting for that moment of transition from miserable to comfortable. That’s my addiction.
And then I can get some work done without hurting.
Thank you again PainfulOne for your advice. I need to focus on sticking to my prescribed dose and NEVER go over. Even if I have saved a couple of pills. I can’t guarantee I won’t cheat. But I do see that cheating today means my regular dose won’t work at all tomorrow and I’ll have to cheat again tomorrow.
Baby steps........
 

Painful One

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 18, 2017
Messages
1,188
I certainly need to do some work. And its more complicated than I thought. I see now why a good rehab program is 90 days.

It is amazing how our decisions can be driven by pain. I now plan every aspect of my life around what I cannot do anymore and whether or not I will have enough medication to do it. At this point I would turn down a free trip to Hawaii if it interfered with my pain management Dr appt.

P.O. I am so happy that you got back on track with your prescribed dose. Sometimes I get excited about being free from the pills, but I think you’re right and I need more attainable goals. Getting back to my prescribed dose is a more realistic target.

Still no word from Shroomi??
You are welcome. I’m glad to help.

Yeah, it is amazing how badly pain can effect our lives. I wouldn’t even be able to go on a free trip to Hawaii. That is how bad things have gotten for me. I’m going to have to consider whether it is time to take Levodopa. Due to my movement problems.

I know exactly what you mean about having to plan out everything according to pain , symptoms, and medication.
It is a bummer. But I am grateful that the medication makes it possible for me to do as well as I am doing.
I really need it to work. As tempting as it gets to just take extra and have more relief, it just isn’t worth it for me.

Thank you Squeaky. I am glad I was able to get back on track with my dosage too. Had to be done. I get absolutely unable to think or function at all without my regular dosage.

Yup, Small steps my friend. You will get there. I have to remind myself that if I take extra today then I will need extra tomorrow also and will have to suffer some withdrawal from even one day of using extra. That is one thing that keeps me on track. I don’t get it perfect every month but have only had to resort to the Lope for a night or a day here and there. I have it pretty close to perfect now! WooHoo!

Still no word from Shroomy. I am really worried about him! I sure wish we would hear from him.

I’m glad you have pain relief today! Enjoy!
Take care.
 

Squeaky

Bluelighter
Joined
Feb 1, 2016
Messages
969
Location
USA
Yeah. Extra means less. I guess it’s really math:
I get 3 per day. For every day I take 4, there will be a day with only 2. I know I would suffer if I have to cut my dose in half, but somehow it sounds like an OK plan to take 6 for a while and leave myself with zero for a while.
Yesterday I took 6. It was so nice to not be in pain.
 

Squeaky

Bluelighter
Joined
Feb 1, 2016
Messages
969
Location
USA
Got another script yesterday. Already I can see I’m not sticking to my plan. I’m giving myself the weekend to straighten the f up and not take more than prescribed. Then I’m going to have to do something drastic this time, like giving my pills away. Better to not have any at all than dig this hole AGAIN. I know a pill junkie who would seriously love to get my bottle of oxy for free, a great friend who might be willing to hold them for me and just not let me have any at all, and maybe my lady who might get mad but still be willing to hold my pills for me.
Finny thing is right now I’m really only addicted to feeling like shit(in actual pain or in withdrawl) and sitting quietly so I can feel the moment when the pain drains away. Its like great sex — I want the room to be quiet and to be left alone. Only for about an hour. I enjoy the feeling of the pain leaving. I even look forward to being in pain so I can have that moment on the pills .

And it’s hitting me right now. Gotta go😌
 

Lost_Vet

Bluelighter
Joined
Aug 24, 2016
Messages
74
Location
The Heartland
Hi guys,

I'm just checking in and its been a while. I've been clean for almost two years now. I read in another sub that life is good with opiates but probably won't be without. That's just wrong. When I was using I was thinking dark thoughts all the time. Also I was treating the people in my life like crap because all I cared about was when I could take that next pill. It took me a long time to get back in my family's good graces. Life is just plain better because your mind is yours again. Its not clouded by anything bad. Are there hiccups? Definitely. Every time I walk into Walgreens my body goes nuts because that smell used to mean it was time for refills, my favorite time of the month. Especially since I over used and was probably two days into withdrawals. I'm nobody special and I did this, anyone else can. I wish you all great luck with your struggle.
 
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