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-The- Heroin & Opioid Mega Discussion Thread (Volumes 1+2 Merged)

ocean

Bluelight Crew
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Mar 7, 2007
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I noticed our old Opioid MEGA was archived but a new one was not made. There have been quite a few folks discussing various types of Opiate addiction, w/d and all that comes with it- So thought I'd restart this......

This thread will focus on Supporting each other through the rough road you take in order to get off of Opiates.
Please Share your stories, what has helped you, your struggles......... <3


The Old thread can be found HERE.
 
been doin dope and ocs probably once a week sometimes twice since may. I started to feel really shitty in between using and I've been 13 days clean today. I'm really craving to use (bought a .5 of SUPER fire yesterday, just couldn't refuse) but I am holding out because I know how much the withdrawals suck. I need to wait at least a month before I do any more and i know I should wait longer....

I wish i hadn't started taking massive doses to nod towards the end of the summer....i can't believe how much those 3 days raised my tolerance
 
been on and off morphine last month and right now im taking a week off. slight WDs very persistent. sucks cuz i just came to college and im not too social like that
 
Been off dope and opiates for a year and 5 months now. Something strange happened this week though, I got really sick with a cold/strep throat. The fever and chills, aches and pains reminded me so much of what it felt like to be in withdrawal that I started fantasizing that I was withdrawling, and have consequently started craving dope hardcore :\ Haven't really had to fight any cravings in months until now.

Guess its just par for the course.
 
Been off dope and opiates for a year and 5 months now. Something strange happened this week though, I got really sick with a cold/strep throat. The fever and chills, aches and pains reminded me so much of what it felt like to be in withdrawal that I started fantasizing that I was withdrawling, and have consequently started craving dope hardcore :\ Haven't really had to fight any cravings in months until now.

Guess its just par for the course.


Wow ~ a withdrawal flashback caused by an actual medical illness caused cravings? That's fucked up and I feel for ya! Never heard/read of that before but may just be typical?!? :(

Feeling better though (hopefully)?

R*B
 
Been on and off opiates for over 15 years. Started with a script for Vicodin for pain when I was 18 and blossomed to Heroin over the past 2 years.

How quickly things go downhill. Once I realized just how much I loved the warm, euphoric blanket, it didn't take long for me to experiment to find the next strongest opiate high. Withdrawals were only an unfortunate side-effect of opiod experimentation.

Clean now ~ still crave.

R*B
 
dude, thats my exact experience with sickness. i was addicted to H for so long that when i got clean feeling ANYTHING uncomfortable would trick me into thinking i was sick. like sweating. i never felt the discomfort of sweating unless i was sick so my body was used to it going hand in hand. its pretty fucked up that heroin can pervade your psychosomatic system so thoroughly. my god, heroin. what a CUNT.
 
Pfft.... instead of getting blown-up and being remembered/earning more in death than I'll ever get otherwise; the dumbass who tried taking out my guntruck was definitely inept.... so i walked away with a telescoped-spine, mashed knees, and the ol' army sawbones promptly slung as much morphine at me as I could ever ask for.

hence, a previously awesome 8yr marriage disintigrated when it was caught between my army career and becoming a junky. i was too fucked up to stay in, so i got an "Impact Atta-boy" award and medically outted.

so my whole life disintegrated, i'm still physically fucked up, unable to work a normal job (much less find one), AND i came out of it with a raging morphine habit..... the solution?
morphine, heroin, meth, and pot. usually.
i signed almost nine years of my life away, and this is what i get left with?
lucky me.

deciding to quit junk wasn't really something I *wanted* to do.... as it's so much more effective than psych-med shit at blotting things out. really it was a financial decision....
plus I hate jail, and knowing my luck that's where i was gonna end up eventually.... rather than in the ground.

sometimes i get really pissed that my sense of self-preservation has been such a bitch, when i really get to thinking about the world of shit i live in.
terminal cancer? fuck all that.... i got given terminal-life.
 
^^^
Wow, that's quite a story man. I think I remember reading about it before, but mesmerizing nonetheless. It's a terrible thing that happened to you, I can relate only on a small scale. I had arthritis problems early on in my life and turned to opiates for pain relief. I'm a young guy only 22 but I had been using poppy pods for 2 years and was basically feeling like a hopeless addict.

I think that an opiate addiction, however insidious it might be for the normal individual, is probably even worse for someone who suffers from chronic pain. In addition to the enjoyment of it all, it actually relieves you physically from the terrible pain that you have. It makes it that much harder to ever stop - the pain comes back with a vengeance. During my struggles with sobriety, physical pain is something that I always had to deal with but it was so much worse after trying to get over a major opiate habit. And no matter how long I stay clean, I still think about how much I'd like to use the poppy pods just one more time. But it always leads to the same place when you go back.

The longer I remain clean, the better I feel. But I feel now that having tussled with opiates has really changed my life. However so far it has done me much more harm than good. I think I'm looking forward to a life without them.
 
oh yeah, that reminds me. I got RA too. Genetics straight $μXx0r$ sometimes. It's not too bad yet, but I'll be lucky if I'm not hobbled by the time I'm 40. NSAIDs are my friend. :/

I'm not really crying about it.... nobody forced me to raise my hand and volunteer to get shot at & blow'd up. I knew when I went in that most marriages don't make it through one enlistment, especially when 12mo+ deployments to the asshole of the world are thrown in for good measure.
I *DID* get to spend 4 years in Germany, had some pretty far-out fun, plus got to go cyclic on some insurgent fucktards & blow shit up besides. w00t

however, I do like drugs, and the drugs *definitely* do like me. so I done dug my own holes just fine.

(tonight's alliteration-nite. tomorrow I'm boycotting vowels, they're too expensive)
 
I'm glad I don't have any oxy's, I feel like popping two or three of them at the moment.

I'm just gonna take some Rx sedative instead and hopefully sleep off the moodiness
 
I haven't done opiates in 5 days. I have only been doing them about 1 to 2 times a week since early may, which I think is still too often. It helps that I have no steady connects and I don't go out looking for opiates. I know I'm playing with fire but I just can't accept the fact that I should never touch another opiate again. So I allow myself to use once in a while, when the paws start getting to me.
 
I just got started on suboxone about 2 weeks ago from a doctor. I am SO GLAD!
I quit cold turkey last time, but when I relapsed, I relapsed hard, and my tolerance got worse than it had ever gotten.
It's just so nice to be completely craving free, and it allows me to enjoy hanging out with my friends without thinking about copping drugs at all. I am getting into a healthier routine slowly, but this is finally the step in the right direction.
 
I've been a junkie for 8 years now as of late I'm on the longest hiatus yet going on 8 months. I still struggle everyday with thoughts of just giving it all up and shooting away my life savings but for some reason I don't. I finally wanted to live again and I truly believe that's all that that has kept me clean. I saw where I was heading which was the streets of Downtown Denver in October and decided I wanted more from life. I feel like certain people I have met along the way of recovery have had an astounding impact on my life. Because of that I reach out to other's just to talk. See no one person has a definitive answer to quitting opiates or anything really. For me it took trying everything in the book from NA, Cold Turkey, Subs. Psychs, and Rehab, to being locked in a basement for a month. After all of it I knew what I needed to fix in order to get better. Also, I made some of the best friends of my life through getting clean. i hope everyone is doing well and if you ever want to talk to someone PM me.
 
Tried rehab/psych/suboxone/just fucking quitting and now I'm back at the methadone clinic for the 3rd time. My biggest fear about quitting, though, is that life will never seem as fun as it was on opiates-- like my brain will never experience the right amount of pleasure in every seemingly fun thing I ever do for the rest of my life. Some people I've talked to say that eventually you get over it and can feel normal someday, while others say that the cravings are there forever and life is never as euphoric as it was during/before addiction. Unfortunately I've never been clean long enough to make my own observations.
 
Opiates are the goverments' way to keep the thinkers and the nonconformists down. Down with addiction!
 
I have been clean from heroin for 22 months now. I am on Suboxone, but am on a low dose, and I have effectively gotten much better. I know I am not going to relapse again, and I am really happy for my success.

Good luck to everyone who is trying to discontinue heroin/opiate use. It's not easy but you will come out of it a stronger person!
 
i was always the type of youngster that loved adrenaline rushes back in LA with my cousins..but then we moved and everything got boring and just turned wack basically..i basically stopped talking to people and stayed inside most of the time with the exception of going out but i HAD to do some sort of drug or else "it wouldnt be worth it"...so when i tried tramadol for the first time i felt "myself" again basically..i had a smile on and all of the problems that i had turned to positive ones so now im doing oxy like every day and i know im not going to be a able to stop ever cuz i just love living a "regular" or normal life like "everyone else"
 
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