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Social The Dark Side Social Thread v. Darksiders Forever

man for some reason the last few days has seen me in a dark disposition. wish i could put on that plastic smile more but alas not very good at it.
in a time when i would expect to feel at least a little elation at some recent accomplishments... i am feeling moody, irritable and just shitty. kinda like withdrawals. havent dropped anything substance so do not think that is it.
maybe too much going on and stepping back to get a broader perspective? feeling disconnected but definitely not irl ffs. broodish....
all these sneak assaults (cowardice) against asians is on my mind. wife is thai... wont matter they all look alike to trumpists. just another freakin gremlin to guard against. we all kinda feel a war on the horizon, i think. if i aint already gone yet maybe i can "advise".
just do not feel that positive at all.
like the dread a razor-cleaver juggler may feel?
could prolly use a slab to put shit in perspective.
peace
 
yeah guess it has always been dark to me just get a ray of light once in a while....
haha
payin off all fines tomorrow AM maybe i get a ride soon and we take a road trip....
long overdue
 
Met with a therapist today over the telehealth thing. Went pretty good. Felt weird though, was the first time I was doing something like that. The therapist couldn't help but to agree and smile and laugh at almost everything I said. So I'm not sure, I felt like they were just doing so to acknowledge. They said I have social anxiety and PTSD. So there is that.
I am set up to see a nurse practitioner on Monday. So might end up taking the day off to deal with that, and if need I can go pick up some medication.
In other news, my boss put in his 2 weeks today, so means I'll be getting another boss. So who knows, he might not even show up Monday for work (the day I want to take off).

I am hoping that things will get better for me. Living with anxiety fucking sucks.
 
D's said:
I am still in pain from a tooth the dentist extracted a week ago. It feels like a dull pain, nothing sharp. Really fucking sucks though. My immediate fear is it is getting infected and is going to get worse. Hopefully that is just me being overly paranoid.
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Be careful you don’t develop a dry socket as that needs attention. It will be very painful.
 

im 6mg subutex down, can i gwt some stimulNT LIKE KAT for thw rest of the day to keeep nw going​

 
Tonight i did it again. Swept someone of there feet, like literally. And caught him on the way down and told him in zulu to get the fuck out of here. Like wtf... Why is my live full of this shit atm
 
I am moving to a new state on Saturday. Wish me luck, mofos.
Ahhhhhh !!!
Tomorrow is my last day of work ! Then I practice my synth urine routine for the drug test. I do NOT miss this part of being on paper.
 
^ so we can talk about drugs here in TDS.
well i have a chance at pain management again. I am so worried. i am so stressed.

but i am filled with rheumatoid arthritis but am too sick to get outta bed to do anything about it and cook right. but have been lately. OUCH.

juvenile diabetes is definitely a condition and i didn't keep up with it and now i am sick as all f**k so i didn't keep up with it and no one wants to help now. now ot's just f**katoid arthritis.

AND i realised that medical marijuana was putting a dent in my pain but i have since quit because i am expecting a drug test at pain management ? Anybody ?

when i used to go they tested me for drugs ?
so i would only smoke a few and a half days after the appointments and drank lots of water. it worked out perfect !

the thing that makes this so dark to me is that i really am in pain. it hurts so f**k** bad that i want to cry. the thing is others can't always see pain. wow. you should see my ganglion cyst on my wrist NOW.

i know there is a doctor(s) on here. sorry forgot your avatar thing name. so i hope one of you's can see what we have to go through.

i hate it. hate it. hate it hate it. i could care less if i die too. that's how much they all care. ewwww gunna gets in trouble from the government for prescribings all the wrong stuffff. yeah.

i don't need anymore life anyway. i don't care let someone else have it. yeah just let me choke on benzo's. all the right stuff. N OOOOOOOOT.
 
Hylight said:
^ so we can talk about drugs here in TDS.
well i have a chance at pain management again. I am so worried. i am so stressed.

but i am filled with rheumatoid arthritis but am too sick to get outta bed to do anything about it and cook right. but have been lately. OUCH.

juvenile diabetes is definitely a condition and i didn't keep up with it and now i am sick as all f**k so i didn't keep up with it and no one wants to help now. now ot's just f**katoid arthritis.

AND i realised that medical marijuana was putting a dent in my pain but i have since quit because i am expecting a drug test at pain management ? Anybody ?

when i used to go they tested me for drugs ?
so i would only smoke a few and a half days after the appointments and drank lots of water. it worked out perfect !

the thing that makes this so dark to me is that i really am in pain. it hurts so f**k** bad that i want to cry. the thing is others can't always see pain. wow. you should see my ganglion cyst on my wrist NOW.

i know there is a doctor(s) on here. sorry forgot your avatar thing name. so i hope one of you's can see what we have to go through.

i hate it. hate it. hate it hate it. i could care less if i die too. that's how much they all care. ewwww gunna gets in trouble from the government for prescribings all the wrong stuffff. yeah.

i don't need anymore life anyway. i don't care let someone else have it. yeah just let me choke on benzo's. all the right stuff. N OOOOOOOOT.
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The rules are the same as they were for TDS, I didn't think his comment really broke the "no drug talk in social threads" rule. But I am also fairly lenient on those rules.
 
deficiT said:
The rules are the same as they were for TDS, I didn't think his comment really broke the "no drug talk in social threads" rule. But I am also fairly lenient on those rules.
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Yes. I have to find the right threads. All the right stuff. 👍🏼👍🏼

Feel good. (felt good though)

And thank you.
 
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