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  • BDD Moderators: Keif’ Richards | negrogesic

The bigger my stash, the less I use

jimdron

Bluelighter
Joined
Dec 28, 2017
Messages
300
Anyone experiencing this dynamic?

What I mean is very simple. If I purchase substantial quantity of my favorite drug, it's easier to stick to schedule (so that it won't get out of hand). Psychologically it probably can be explained in that I feel safer in not running out of my "medication" and it is one less factor stressing me.
 
Not really. I'd be figuring out different ways to use my medication; I think you're talking about cocaine. I'd also be IVing it which I haven't tried and don't recommend trying
 
It's the same with me. I smoke fentadope and i buy 3-4 grams at a time because it's cheaper but i have noticed i use less then say if i bought a gram.
 
I’m the opposite.. when I have a lot I’m like “oh yeah fuck it I got plenty gonna treat myself” . Then I get so pissed when I don’t have a lot left , like damn I didn’t need that extra those first couple days ..
 
It depends on the drug for me. If I had a lot of meth I could ration that no problem. A pound would last me a couple years. If I had a pound of marijuana, I'd probably use it all up in a year
 
Yeah. Especially when it's down to the last bit. Say, one gram meth. I'll blow through it way quicker than I would normally.
 
I've been thinking about this. If you feel disgusted with yourself and chuck it out, you just end up buying more shit and head first into a bender.
 
I'm the opposite with addictive drugs... if I have a lot, it's easy to convince myself that just a little more won't make much of a difference in what I have. Whereas if I have a small amount it's easy to see that I will run out soon so I can conserve better.

The only drugs I can keep a stash of are weed and psychedelics. My stash of psychedelics at this point could probably keep me tripping twice a week for the rest of my life and I wouldn't run out. But I don't desire to trip anywhere near that often. So it definitely won't ever run out. :D
 
I'm also the opposite. The more I have makes me care less about how much I have and always start using more than I ration for then realize I only have 10% left and freak out.

I'm also like that with money to an extent go figure.
 
Haha, yeah me too (re: money). Although trying to change that, I put most of my savings into some investments recently so I won't touch it and it will grow. I notice that I get excited to save some more and invest with it for the prospect of it growing over time, rather than spend it frivolously.

back when I used to be a daily pothead, I noticed when I started buying in quantity, I started smoking way more. When you have an ounce or two staring you in the face, smoking an extra few bowls a day doesn't seem like a big deal. Then when I'd start running low, I'd find all sorts of reasons to wait before packing another.
 
Thanks, it is interesting how different your answers are.

In contradiction to original post of mine, I am using much more lately. And I let myself do that, because I bought significant quantity of cocaine and it warms my heart.

What I think is happening is that, I would use less because stress of not having cocaine at hand is less. But in the same conditions I would use more cocaine, because whatever stress I am relieving with cocaine, could be relieved, since I have cocaine.

But relief from securing supply of cocaine for a while is real, obviously. But I get more aware of other stresses in me, since now I feel a bit more secure to acknowledge them, since I relieve them with cocaine.

Interesting stuff.
 
Drugs I can’t preserve regardless of amount: heroin and cocaine. The more I have the more I use -

But for whatever reason I can sit on meth adderall and mdma with no issue
 
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