Tears of a clown

[lostNfound]

I'm still pretty much in the same headspace i was back here except I understand more about who I am now and try to think less about shit and act on things. if i think i too much it can hold me back.
i hesitate less these days and enjoy stuff so much more.

I think whatever influences we have around us on a daily basis filter themselves, or we do ourselves what bullshit we will accept into our way of thinking. That being our way of life and how we live.

Not knowing heaps of people doesnt really say alot about you, neither does the opposite, knowing heaps.

You could argue that people who are always around others purposely surround themselves in company so they dont have to think about their own problems.
You could also say they do this because they are content where they are simply enjoy company and want to share their good times.


Basically, I've leant to be comfortable in myself and by myself, mostly by not overanalysing things anymore.
So now I' generally fairly comfortable in any situation.

 

[dialated665]

Great thread !

i fit right into this category.....

SAD CLOWN thing is defiantly tru, i make all my close friends laugh (with me and at me) I feel as if i accomplished something by bringing laughter to others

also i hate getting complimented for things i've done/made

Im a perfectionist.... I hate having the idea in my head that i have to strive for perfection.

i've also been told i have a mild case of obsessive compulsive disorder

I like to think of these as Qualitys. and they make me unique and just ME

 

[onetwothreefour]

^^^ except you sound just like me

 

[chrissy]

^ AND me 8)

 

[endlesseulogy]

muzby, I know exactly how you feel mate.. i have had to put up with this same thing day in day out for years. I am still quite insecure about how i am.. People tell me im this and that.. im not ungreatful them.. they may be right.. but unless you FEEL it.. people can say all the nice things in the world and it wont make a difference. But this is what ive come to understand.. Its about finding out who you really are. Life is a continual journey of self-discovery. You gotta search deep within yourself and find out what your life means and where you want it to head. If you have to change your environment, friends, job whatever.. do it.. People are normally sad and depressed and feel insecure because they get up in the morning and feel their life has no meaning or significance in the grand scheme of things. Once you start to clear your head and things start to make more sense, the world automatically becomes a happier place. The sun shines brighter.. you look at yourself in the mirror and u look better, music sounds better.... You are the world.. If your mind is like a trash can it will project itself onto the world and your whole existance will suck. But if you search hard enough, you will clear away all the mess and be faced with your true self, whoever that may be... I suggest taking up a hobby.. find something that really really interests you.. find some significance.